#AloneTogether

The one thing everyone has in common today with most people around the world is that we’re all at home. Unless you’re in the healthcare community, work at an “essential” business or one that has figured out how to do curbside pickup, you’re experiencing alone time.

Those who have children or family members at home might be laughing that you wish you had some alone time.

In recent years, there’s been infrequent unity across political and spiritual differences, but COVID-19 has leveled the playing field. Well, maybe not political divides—sadly, many are trying to make this crisis political.

The last significant unifying occurrence in America would probably be 911. While we all mourned together the horrific attack on our country, New York suffered the brunt of pain and loss.

COVID-19 is indiscriminate. It’s a pandemic. The entire world is experiencing pain and loss. We’re all in this together. Even though states and countries may be handling this crisis differently, the streets of most towns and cities are empty.

We’re #alonetogether!

Physical Distancing but Not Social Distancing

The first time I heard the term “social distancing,” it grated on me like fingernails on a chalkboard. I didn’t like it. People are saying it will be our new normal. That would be a tragic fallout of this experience.

We will probably need to stay at a physical distance from each other, maybe not hug or handshake for a while. Some say forever.

But socially isolating ourselves from each other permanently is dangerous and unsustainable. Social distancing can never become social disengagement!

We need each other. We need physical touch. We need to stay in touch!

Since the beginning of Creation, The Lord God said, “It is not good for the man to be alone. Genesis 2:18

God created us as social beings to interact and communicate with each other, not distance ourselves emotionally, spiritually, physically, socially, or mentally.

The ultimate punishment for someone in prison is solitary confinement, alone.

Even if you’re not typically a social person, social isolation leads to loneliness, which leads to poor physical and mental health.

How can I say that?

Well here are some statistics from a psychologist for those who suffer from loneliness:

29% are more likely to have coronary artery disease

32% are more likely to have a stroke or die

40% are more likely to have dementia, if they’re in that age group.

  • When we stop using our cognitive skills to interact, our brain starts deteriorating.
  • When we stop using our relational instincts to interact, our emotions start deteriorating.
  • When we stop using our physical impulses to interact, our body starts deteriorating.

In an article by Axel F. Sigurdsson, MD, PhD, Loneliness, Social Isolation, and Poor Health, He pointed out

“Studies show that loneliness and social isolation are associated with increased risk of early mortality. Being socially connected increases not only psychological and emotional well-being but also has a positive influence on physical health.”

“Although loneliness is usually associated with social isolation, it is important to discriminate between the two. Social isolation refers to a lack of contact with other people, while loneliness indicates a state of mind.”

Despite these different definitions, there is significant overlap between social isolation and loneliness. Hence, the terms are often used interchangeably.”

You might be actually living alone in isolation right now or you might be feeling isolated even though you’re not physically alone.

We’re out of our routines. Maybe you went to work every day and now you’re out of work or working from home.

How many times did we complain about having to grocery shop, but now it’s considered an “essential” reason to leave home. It’s a luxury even though we have to mask up and wear gloves and deal with empty shelves, at least we’re out of the house and among other people.

We’re #alonetogether!

We Can, and Must, Stay Socially Connected Even While Quarantined

#Alonetogether

Social media probably creates more virtual friends, than face-to-face friends. Yet aren’t those of us on social media glad we have these “friends” to communicate and commiserate with because we’re all going through something similar. It gives us a sense of social connectedness.

As our fresh food supply at home started dwindling, I looked in the refrigerator vegetable drawer and there was a big package of organic Romaine hearts and a bundle of avocadoes. That was all. So I put a post on Facebook, “I have Romaine lettuce but only avocadoes to make a salad. What else do you put in your salads? #nothingfresh #stayinghome.”

I started getting immediate responses and within hours, I had 100 comments and many new ideas for my salads. I heard from people I haven’t “talked to” on Facebook or in person for years from all walks of my life. We couldn’t share a meal together, but they were eager to help me plan mine.

My cousin read the post and commented, “These all sound so good!”

It almost felt like I had a group of friends helping me make dinner, while they probably were working on their dinner too.

If you’re not a social media fan, you can use SKYPE, ZOOM, or video chatting and messaging to talk while seeing each other. I mentioned in last week’s blog, #America Works Together Keeping the Faith, how my grandkids gave me a virtual birthday party.

We can use the tools we have to stay connected with each other. Churches who have video transmitting capability are reporting more online viewers and commitments to faith than they would ever have at church on Sunday. God is using the “screen” to reach people for Christ.

God uses inconvenient, unpleasant circumstances for good and so can we. It’s not the same as being together, that’s for sure, but it’s what we have right now.

We’re #alonetogether!

A note on social media. Stay away from negative input or people that bring you down emotionally. Avoid getting into political discussions or any that cause you anxiety.

“Call Your Mama!”

In one news report, the Surgeon General was discussing why older people were more susceptible to the coronavirus. He also addressed the loneliness that especially occurs if they’re living alone or unable to drive, be active physically, or get out of the house. Now they can’t even visit with their grandchildren and friends.

He closed his talk with “Call your mama!”

I would say my daughter and I have talked more since the pandemic started than we did before. It wasn’t like we didn’t talk a lot, we just talk more now—not texting or on Facebook, but on the phone. Hearing each other’s voice, laughs, and sometimes tears!

The story of the Rosetans may help to understand the importance of family relations and social surroundings for the risk of heart disease and other physical and mental illnesses.

In 1964 a study published in the Journal of the American Medical Association examined a population of recent Italian immigrants in Roseto, a small town in the state of Pennsylvania. The study was instigated because the town doctor was completely baffled by the Rosetans’ near immunity to heart disease. He reported his observation and an extensive statistical population study funded by the American State and Federal governments was conducted.

The study compared health statistics of Rosetans to neighbouring towns and the initial results were astonishing. During the seven year period of study from 1955-1961:

No-one in Roseto under the age of 47 died of a heart attack; there was a complete absence of heart disease in men under the age of 55

The rate of heart attacks in men over 65 was half the national average

The death rates from all causes was 35% lower than anywhere else

The study confirmed the town doctor’s findings and went on to examine the factors that gave the Rosetans such improved health. It became known as the ‘The Roseto Effect’.

While living in the town to conduct the study however, the researchers observed several major differences as to how the Rosetans related to others in their community. They noticed a remarkably close-knit social pattern that was cohesive and mutually supportive with strong family and community ties, where the elderly in particular were not marginalized, but revered. Put simply, the Rosetans lived in brotherhood with one another.

The Roseto effect is a term used to describe the phenomenon by which a close-knit community experiences a reduced rate of heart disease.

So call your Mama, Dad, Grandparents, or extended family! Your life and their life could depend on it right now.

#AloneTogether!

The Loneliness Epidemic

I’ve mentioned in previous blogs that God has been nudging me to write a book on loneliness. He planted the seed in my mind last fall as my latest book Everyday Brave: Living Courageously as A Woman of Faith was releasing. I kept putting God off. We spent six weeks after the release of this book in Southern California. Then we returned home to the holidays, and before we knew it, we were experiencing a pandemic where people are isolated! Alone! Lonely!

I said, “Lord, forgive me for not taking You seriously when You put the theme of loneliness on my heart.” I had been asking people to pray for me to start writing, but I often said I was afraid the Lord would ask me to personally experience loneliness before I could write about it.

Well here we are. I’m in the high-risk category for COVID-19. I’m isolated! I’m writing.

I know many of you are experiencing some type of loneliness now or you have in the past. Would you be willing to share your story to help someone else? I need to hear from you!

  • When have you experienced loneliness?
  • How are you dealing with staying home now?
  • How did it present itself to you?
  • How did you overcome it, or maybe you haven’t yet?
  • How did God help you through it or what helped you the most?

You don’t have to answer in the comments here if that’s uncomfortable, but I would so appreciate receiving your story. I’ve noticed more people want to share their stories these days to help others and to help themselves heal.

Remember we’re all #Alonetogether!

I wanted to remind you that Everyday Brave: Living Courageously As A Woman of Faith is at a reduced price on my website for the month of April. I’ll sign and personalize it for you. It might make a thoughtful Mother’s Day gift for someone or for you. We’re certainly living in times requiring us to Get Our Brave On.

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#America Works Together Keeping the Faith!

You’ve probably listened intently, as I have, to the daily Coronavirus Task Force briefings. In the beginning, we heard about the astronomical number of ventilators, ICU beds, and protective equipment that would be required when this virus hit America full force.

Scientists explained staggering graphs predicting horrific numbers of deaths. We became accustomed to hearing terms like “mitigation” “granular” “peaks” “flattening out the curve” “models.”

We were told, sometimes commanded, to practice “social distancing” “sheltering in place” quarantining, repeatedly washing our hands, not touching our faces, thoroughly sanitizing our homes. Don’t wear masks unless you’re sick morphed to everyone wear masks when you leave home. And don’t forget your disposable gloves.

We went from not gathering in groups of more than 50, than 30, than 10, and now only with those in your household.

The economy came to a complete halt as businesses closed their doors, workers laid off, schools, parks, restaurants, and beaches closed. Only what the local governments considered “essential” stayed open. Liquor stores are deemed essential but churches are “nonessential.” If a pastor thinks differently, he can be arrested or fined.

We followed “Presidential Guidelines for 15 Days” now extended to 30 days, as we anxiously await to hear what happens on May 1.

But alas the enormous number of ventilators thought to be required weren’t needed and we may now give our excess to other countries. Those contracting the disease and succumbing from it didn’t come close to the predicted dire statistics.

What Happened? We Kept the Faith!

The scientists explain the discrepancy in their predictions with what actually materialized was because they underestimated that the American people would follow the “mitigation” guidelines so closely. Grandparents would stop seeing their grandchildren. Everyone would stay 6 feet apart. Stop hugging. Stop shaking hands. Stop leaving home.

They also didn’t factor into their graphs and statistics, or even give credit to, the power of prayer.

Facts without faith are just numbers on a chart. With God, all things are possible. I wrote about this last month in my blog Family, Faith, and Science.

Yesterday, on Easter, we celebrated the fact that Jesus arose from the dead on the third day. Jesus was a real person who walked on this earth, was crucified on a cross, and was resurrected to walk on the earth again for 40 days before ascending to heaven to await those of us who believe in Him.

Facts substantiate our Christian faith.

Even though we couldn’t go to church, we could, and would, still pray from our homes for God to heal our land, comfort the sick, grieve with the grieving, give strength and protection to all the first-responders and hospital workers.

We plead with God to infuse our President with wisdom as he is forced to make decisions he could have never imagined would materialize on his watch.

As head of the task force, Vice President Pence, a devout Christian, often calls on the American people to pray and thanks them for their prayers “to heal our land.”

On Good Friday, our President addressed the American people from the Oval Office and thanked everyone praying for him and his family, “those prayers are felt” he said. Later that day at the press conference, as he discussed the importance of Easter which we would be celebrating from our homes, he publically said to the press and everyone watching, “I’m a Christian and Easter is important to me!”

#AmericaWorksTogether

Share each other’s burdens, and in this way obey the law of Christ. Galatians 6:2 NLT

Yes, what the scientists and statisticians didn’t calculate into their models was the fortitude and predisposition of the American people to pray and love their neighbor more than themselves.

I think they were blown away with the ingenuity, compassion, creativity, and selflessness of the majority of people to pitch in and help each other during a crisis. Especially, caring for those we repeatedly hear are the most vulnerable. Every time someone says, “those most at risk,” I get a lump in my throat and fight back tears because I’m in that group.

I’ve been on the receiving end of kindness, generosity, and love. Here are just a few ways I’ve experienced someone loving their neighbor more than themselves during this pandemic.

#Americans Working Together

1. Our daughter didn’t want us going into grocery stores. She took our grocery lists and went shopping for us at two different stores. Yes, she went to Trader Joe’s for me!!

2. We had been hibernating at home since the end of February and live over an hour away from shopping, so by the time things got serious, protective and sanitizing supplies weren’t available online. A dear friend gave me disinfecting wipes, which are truly like gold. Then the Holy Spirit woke her up at 6:00 am the next morning telling her she needed to protect me more and she gave us two masks and reusable gloves.

#Americans Working Together

3. A Facebook friend saw my picture on FB using a bandanna as a face mask and messaged me that a woman at her church was making face masks. What was my address and she would send us two. They arrived yesterday!

4. A neighbor had extra berries from a local vendor and called to see if we would like some.

5. Another friend and her husband picked up items for us at COSTCO when they went shopping. They took their pickup and also shopped for others in our rural community.

6. My birthday was last week and my hubby called the local restaurant a few days early to order takeout for a special meal. He asked if they could make my favorite entree, which wasn’t on their menu, and they said sorry not this time. But when the owner chef heard it was my birthday, his wife called to say he would order what he needed to make my request. I cried.

When hubby went to pick up our dinner, he saw other friends. They said they takeout once a week to support this restaurant.

7. We’re restricted from being around our grandchildren, so my 11-year-old granddaughter made my favorite chocolate cake and then the grandkids video messaged me to sing Happy Birthday and virtually give me a piece of cake while they enjoyed eating it.

I feel like I’m always on the receiving end of kindness, but then I receive emails and messages from readers telling me that a blog or Facebook post I wrote encouraged them or helped reduce their anxiety.

Then I’m reminded that God gave each of us gifts and when we surrender those gifts back to Him, He can use them where they’re needed most.

The blog that has recently generated the greatest response is Five Powerful Prayers for Peace Amidst Pandemic Fear. Maybe it will bless you too.

I know it would be encouraging to all of us, and especially me, if you shared what you’re doing, or what someone has done for you, during this pandemic.

We’re truly better when #Americaworkstogetherkeepingthefaith!

36 “Teacher, which is the most important commandment in the law of Moses?”

37 Jesus replied, “‘You must love the Lord your God with all your heart, all your soul, and all your mind.’[a] 38 This is the first and greatest commandment. 39 A second is equally important: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’ 40 The entire law and all the demands of the prophets are based on these two commandments.”

Matthew 22:36-40

Opening picture is at a Samaritan’s Purse Coronavirus Hospital.

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What Is God’s Response to ‘Ok Boomer’?

What Does God Say About #OK Bommer

“Mom, are you a boomer?” my eleven-year old granddaughter asked my daughter.

I have to admit that none of the adults at the dinner table understood the significance of that question and so I naively answered, “No, Grammie and Grampa are boomers.” She seemed satisfied, but I continued to ponder her question. So a few days later, I texted her that boomers were born between 1946-1964. She said “thanks,” but still I wondered the genesis of her question. Something else was going on.

Then I began to see articles degrading boomers almost to the point of using ‘boomer’ as a slang or curse word, and then I REALLY wanted to know about my granddaughter’s interest in ‘boomer.’ So I asked her and she said, “Sometimes when I say something, my friends say, ‘Ok boomer,’ when I’m talking like an old person.” And that’s bad? I thought.

But it turns out it is very bad if an eleven-year old might have the perspective of something her grandmother or grandfather taught her, even if that wisdom came from a 2020 year-old person, Jesus Christ.

Being a Boomer Was Special!

I’m a boomer and I must admit most of my life it’s been a rather prestigious position. We were the largest generation in history at that time, born in the two decades after World War II when the surviving soldiers returned home after defeating the enemy. They were ready to bring normalcy back to life, get jobs, raise a family, and enjoy the American dream and ideals they fought so bravely to defend.

Because boomers represented such a vast number of consumers and voters, we influenced fashion and trends, politics, economics, business, entertainment, religion . . . the culture.

We felt respected and appreciated. And then we weren’t. Like every generation, we’ve aged, and as the “old fogies” before us, we suddenly don’t know anything and no one cares about what we want anymore. We’ve become the generation that younger people facetiously and dismissively respond to with an “Ok Boomer,” while rolling their eyes. Not in an admiring or gotcha’ manner, but you’re an old person with views and values we no longer appreciate. In fact, we’re going to blame all the world’s problems on your generation that you left for us to inherit. You’re out of touch with our problems and we don’t want to hear what you think about it.

Ouch!

Aja Romano wrote in her article “OK boomer” isn’t just about the past. It’s about our apocalyptic future.

OK boomer is meant to be cutting and dismissive. It suggests that the conversation around the anxieties and concerns of younger generations has become so exhausting and unproductive that the younger generations are collectively over it. OK boomer implies that the older generation misunderstands millennial and Gen Z culture and politics so fundamentally that years of condescension and misrepresentation have led to this pointedly terse rebuttal and rejection. Rather than endlessly defend decisions stemming from deep economic strife, to save money instead of investing in stocks and retirement funds, to buy avocados instead of cereal — teens and younger adults are simply through.”

How Can Christians Bridge the OK Boomer Generation Gaps?

Now that I am old and gray,
    do not abandon me, O God.
Let me proclaim your power to this new generation,
    your mighty miracles to all who come after me. Psalm 71:18 NLT

Where there are differences, Satan will use them to divide.

[Tweet “Where there are differences, Satan will use them to divide. We see that division in politics, religion, and culture but now more than ever, it rears it’s ugly head in generational antagonism. “]

We see that division in politics, religion, and culture but now more than ever, it rears it’s ugly head in generational antagonism. Yes, we can say that’s always existed, but did it in your family. Did you think your grandparents were completely out of touch with the real world or did you respect and admire their wisdom?

I learned to appreciate Scripture from Granny Reed, who always read from her Bible to my cousins and me as we literally sat at her feet. Granny Hazel taught me how to care for my complexion and played games with me when she came to visit. They were a wealth of experience and I looked forward to spending time with them.

I challenge you that #OKBoomer” is not biblical!

[Tweet “God knew that Satan could use our age differences to divide us so God gave us many Scriptures to help bridge these inevitable generation gaps, and He commands us to live by them.”]

God knew that Satan could use our age differences to divide us so God gave us many Scriptures to help bridge these inevitable generation gaps, and He commands us to live by them. 

Generation after generation stands in awe of your work;
each one tells stories of your mighty acts
. Psalm 145:4 The Message

_________________________________

Let me share a few excerpts from the chapter “Generation Gaps Are Not In God’s Plan” from my book Mentoring for All Seasons.

Why Do We Have Generation Gaps?

[Tweet “It was never God’s plan to have generation gaps in the church: God commanded one generation to pass down his truths to the next generation.”]

It was never God’s plan to have generation gaps in the church: God commanded one generation to pass down his truths to the next generation. But in most churches today, the gap between generations is so wide the only thing passed between the two is mistrust and misunderstanding—all in the name of Jesus.

I believe the older generation often perpetuates the gap by wanting everything to stay the same—same music, same way of doing things, same church service, same church activities. . . . Many churches relegate the young people to their own groups, and their input—whether in music or new ideas or using their talents and gifts—isn’t welcome in the main sanctuary. Then the church wonders why the youth and young adults are leaving in droves.

If we want to stay relevant in the lives of the next generation, we need to learn how to embrace their style of worship . . . their way of communicating . . . their world. If we want to have an impact in their lives—to help guide them in the ways of righteousness—we need to speak their language, care about the things they care about, and reach out to them in love with a desire to understand what’s important to them.

Mentoring: A Privilege Not a Burden

[Tweet “Do you remember when you were the next generation full of hope and ideas and ready to leave your mark on the world? I do. I also remember feeling misunderstood and unappreciated when sharing thoughts and ideas with older adults”]

Do you remember when you were the next generation full of hope and ideas and ready to leave your mark on the world? I do. I also remember feeling misunderstood and unappreciated when sharing thoughts and ideas with older adults. Yet thirty-six times in the New Living Translation of the Bible, the Lord uses the term “generation to generation.” Many more verses instruct us to pour into those who are coming up behind us in the church and in our homes. It was God’s plan for the continuation of his church throughout the generations.

Believers are to teach and train the next generation. Praise God, over the centuries believers have followed this mandate. You and I are benefactors of the sacrifices of believers who have gone before us. Over the years, followers of God and his Son, Jesus Christ, have felt compelled to ensure the next generation:

  • Has access to and knowledge of the Bible.
  • Knows how to communicate with God through the Holy Spirit and prayer.
  • Receives guidance in leading a godly life.

[Tweet “Sharing with the next generation some of what God and life has taught us is truly an honor and a privilege.”]

Sharing with the next generation some of what God and life has taught us is truly an honor and a privilege. “I will bring honor to your name in every generation. Therefore, the nations will praise you forever and ever.” (Ps. 45:17 NLT)

A Plea from the Younger Generation

[Tweet “I often hear from the older generation that the reason they don’t mentor is because the younger generations aren’t interested in being mentored, but his is a misconception and lie of the enemy.”]

I often hear from the older generation that the reason they don’t mentor is because the younger generations aren’t interested in being mentored, but his is a misconception and lie of the enemy. A young woman named Tracy, [and there were many more like her in Mentoring for All Seasons] pleads, “I beg the older generations to please be the mentor God called you to be—take up your cross and invest in the future. It takes patience, perseverance, and Christianity. The woman you invest in today may turn around and invest in tomorrow’s generation.”

_______________________________

[Tweet “If you’re a boomer like me, let’s continue the trend of being the largest influential generation for God!”]

If you’re a boomer like me, let’s continue the trend of being the largest influential generation for God!

That means we ignore the exasperated #OKBoomer meme and turn it into an eager #OKBoomer share with me what you’ve learned about God. Let’s not be offended by this meme but use it for God’s glory!

If you’re one of the younger generations, seek out a Christian boomer who will share with you how God helped her through the seasons of her life and is eager to bestow some of that God-fueled faith with you.

Similarly, teach the older women to live in a way that honors God. They must not slander others or be heavy drinkers.[a] Instead, they should teach others what is good. These older women must train the younger women to love their husbands and their children, to live wisely and be pure, to work in their homes,[b] to do good, and to be submissive to their husbands. Then they will not bring shame on the word of God. Titus 2:3-5 NLT

Mentoring for All Seasons: Sharing Life and God’s Faithfulness is available signed and personalized on my website or also on Amazon and Kindle.

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Breaking News: Life Isn’t Always Fair!

Breaking News: Life Isn't Always Fair

“I never thought that this would be easy, but I thought it would be fair,” said [Meghan] Markle. “And that’s the part that’s really hard to reconcile.”

“If things are fair, that completely tracks for me if things are fair,” said Markle. “If I do something wrong I’d be the first one to go, ‘Oh my gosh, I’m so sorry. I would never do that,’ but when people are saying things that are just untrue and they’re being told they’re untrue but they’re allowed to still say them, I don’t know anybody in the world who would feel that that’s OK. And that’s different than just scrutiny. That’s, what would you call that? That’s a different beast. It’s really a different beast.” [Meghan Markle admits she ‘never thought’ royal life ‘would be easy, but I thought it would be fair.’]

This week the news is full of stories about Meghan Markle and her husband Prince Harry leaving the royal life to live as civilians. What struck me the most about their decision was Markle’s comments about fairness.

She also reportedly said in a reply to her British friends telling her before she married Harry that the British tabloids would destroy her life, “And I, very naively — I’m American,” continued Markel. “We don’t have that there . . . .

[Tweet “Tabloids lie and try to destroy people’s lives, so does mainstream media. And they don’t care if it’s fair or true as long as it makes headlines!”]

I would say she definitely was naïve but also forgetful because not only do the American tabloids lie and try to destroy people’s lives, so does mainstream media. And they don’t care if it’s fair or true as long as it makes headlines! She’s right, it is a beast . . . The Beast!

The point of this blog is not to discuss Harry and Meghan’s reasons for their decision, but to point out that expecting life in a fallen world to be fair is terribly naïve of anyone.

[Tweet “As long as Satan, the father of lies, is allowed to be the ruler of the earth there will be unfairness, lies, gossip, and people who want to destroy lives for the fun of it or for political and financial gain.”]

Life should be fair. I wish it was. But as long as Satan, the father of lies, is allowed to be the ruler of the earth there will be unfairness, lies, gossip, and people who want to destroy lives for the fun of it or for political and financial gain.

Oppressors intentionally hurt people from their own lack of self-worth. If they can make you look bad in some distorted way, they think they might look better. It’s a twisted way of thinking and acting, but see it for what it is, evil.

[Tweet “How have we become a society that thrives on tearing down people with words and actions?”]

How have we become a society that thrives on tearing down people with words and actions? There’s little to no civility in the way people talk about others in the media, late night talk shows, politics, or entertainment. Kindness is weakness and meanness is strength in our perverse culture.

What can we do as Christians when life isn’t fair?

  1. Live our lives so that no one has a reason to lie about us, and if they do, their deception will eventually be exposed. They will look the fool.

But do this in a gentle and respectful way. Keep your conscience clear. Then if people speak against you, they will be ashamed when they see what a good life you live because you belong to Christ. 1 Peter 3:16 NLT

  1. Repay unfairness with kindness.

This will confuse and disarm the aggressor. Don’t match their bad behavior with more bad behavior. Don’t be lured into that trap.

If someone slaps you on one cheek, offer the other cheek also. If someone demands your coat, offer your shirt also. Luke 6:29 NLT

  1. Don’t receive negativity or react to it.

It’s hard to do, but ignore falsehoods or mean words said about you. They sting and hurt but don’t let the person saying them receive the satisfaction of knowing they hit their mark.

This is what the Lord says: “Be just and fair to all. Do what is right and good, for I am coming soon to rescue you and to display my righteousness among you. Isa. 56:1 NLT

  1. Don’t take unfairness seriously or dwell on it.

Replaying unjustness over and over in your mind like an old movie gives the incident more power and robs your joy. Cast it off and carry on with the Lord as your strength.

For the Lord gives wisdom;
    from his mouth come knowledge and understanding.
He holds success in store for the upright,
    he is a shield to those whose walk is blameless,
for he guards the course of the just
    and protects the way of his faithful ones.

Then you will understand what is right and just
and fair—every good path.
10 For wisdom will enter your heart,
    and knowledge will be pleasant to your soul. Proverbs 2:6-10 (NIV)

  1. Don’t be unfair or unjust to others or participate in gossip or untruths.

This is what the Lord says: Be fair-minded and just. Jer. 22:3 NLT

  1. Surround yourself with like-minded people who lift you up and don’t tear you down. 

So encourage each other and build each other up, just as you are already doing. 1 Thess. 5:11 NLT

[Tweet “Prepare your children and grandchildren that life isn’t always fair and they will experience injustice, but God is just and trustworthy.”]

Prepare your children and grandchildren that life isn’t always fair and they will experience injustice, but God is just and trustworthy. Make sure they have a relationship with Jesus and not the world.

It’s a mistake today to teach children that everyone wins. Everyone doesn’t win just ask any competing athlete. To try and keep children in safe spaces where they never learn how to confront opposing views or ideas is not good parenting, but teaching them that Jesus is their protector and provider will help them face the inevitable unjust times in their life.

When hard pressed, I cried to the Lord; he brought me into a spacious place. The Lord is with me; I will not be afraid. What can mere mortals do to me? Psalm 118:5-6

[Tweet “”He [God] will judge the world with justice and rule the nations with fairness.” Psalm 9:8 NLT”]

“He will judge the world with justice and rule the nations with fairness.” Psalm 9:8 NLT

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Grandparents Praying with Purpose

I hope the you had a blessed Thanksgiving whether you were with friends and family or spending a quiet day yourself reflecting how good God is and how fortunate we are to be His children.

Speaking of children, many of us have grandchildren. Dave and I are grandparents to eleven ranging in age from nine to twenty-one. As part of my morning quiet time, I pray God’s Word for these precious ones. It doesn’t mean they haven’t encountered trials and hardships, but they do each know Jesus as their Savior and I find comfort and confidence that God is watching over each one.

But I’m not fooling myself that in today’s culture there will be many temptations and the evil one is targeting the next generation. Satan does not want us producing more Christians in our families and the family of God.

So I want to introduce to you my dear friend Lillian Penner, Co-prayer director for Christian Grandparenting Network, and her new book The New “Revised and Expanded” Grandparenting with a Purpose.

If you’re a grandparent, you’re going to want a copy of this book. If there are grandparents in your life, this would make a great gift. If you’re a parent you need all the help you can get and what a gift to have your parents praying for your children, their grandchildren.

I asked Lillian to tell you about her new book . . . here is a message from Lillian Penner!

Today, there are over 70 million grandparents in the United States plus many more around the world. Grandparents represent one-third of the population with 1.7 million new grandparents added to the ranks every year in the U.S. Grandparents lead 37% of all U.S. households in this country — that’s 44 million households nationwide. (Google) [email protected]

How GRANDPARENTS CAN IMPACT THE WORLD?

[Tweet “We have reached a time in history when the grandparents must rise as one to cry to God.”]

It is estimated that there are over 30 million Christian grandparents. We have reached a time in history when the grandparents must rise as one to cry to God.  I believe if 30 million Christian Grandparents who believe in the power of prayer and deliberately praying the enemy will be crushed.

[Tweet “Satan is relentless in his aggressive attack to desensitize our children to truth and righteousness. This is a spiritual battle requiring spiritual weapons.”]

Satan is relentless in his aggressive attack to desensitize our children to truth and righteousness. This is a spiritual battle requiring spiritual weapons. Our grandchildren and their parents not only need our support, they need our earnest and united prayers. They need our united prayer, a genuine, unified prayer for our hope and dreams for the next generation to be realized.

Grandparenting with a Purpose: Effective Ways to Pray for Your Grandchildren - Revised & Expanded

The “Revised and Expanded” Grandparenting with a Purpose, Effective Ways to Pray for Your Grandchildren is designed to encourage and equip grandparents to intentionally pray for their grandchildren and their parents.

Since I have had many requests for a study guide to go with the chapters, I have expanded the book with additional chapters and a study guide for each chapter, which you will find useful.

  • I have found there are many hurting estranged grandparents today with heavy hearts, so I am addressing that issue in a chapter. Is your grandparenting painful or a blessing?
  • I include a section looking at a view of the culture our grandchildren and their parents are navigating today.
  • God’s Design for grandparenting plus several additional chapters and Scriptures to Pray for Teens and Scriptures for Grandparents to pray for themselves.

The book retails for $14.99, however, on my website it is available for a discounted price of $15.00, including shipping and handling costs in the U. S. for a limited time.  A bonus of Scriptural Prayer resource will be included with your purchase. The book will be available in EBook format for $3.99 for those who would prefer the EBook format or live outside the U. S. to save on shipping costs.

[Tweet ““Revised and Expanded” Grandparenting with a Purpose, Effective Ways to Pray for Your Grandchildren will show grandparents how to be intentional disciple-makers and prayer warriors to impact the next generation.”]

This book will challenge you and give you resources for this spiritual battle with the enemy. It will show you how to be an intentional disciple-maker and prayer warrior to impact the next generation.

Written by Lillian Penner, Co-prayer director for Christian Grandparenting Network. [email protected]

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What Are You Doing For Grandparents Day?

Grandparents Are Uniting in Prayer on Grandparents Day of Prayer

Grandparents Day of Prayer September 8, 2019

Are you wondering when and what is Grandparents Day?

Well, my research shows that it’s actually been a National Holiday for forty-one years!

Congress passed the legislation proclaiming the first Sunday after Labor Day as National Grandparents’ Day and, on August 3, 1978, then-President Jimmy Carter signed the proclamation. September was chosen to signify the “autumn” years of life.

[Tweet “The purpose of Grandparents Day, as stated is “to honor grandparents, to give grandparents an opportunity to show love for their children’s children, and to help children become aware of the strength, information, and guidance older people can offer.””]

The purpose of the holiday, as stated in the preamble to the statute, is “to honor grandparents, to give grandparents an opportunity to show love for their children’s children, and to help children become aware of the strength, information, and guidance older people can offer.”

Wow! That’s almost exactly what God told the generations to do in the Bible.

But from everlasting to everlasting
    the Lord’s love is with those who fear him,
    and his righteousness with their children’s children.— Psalm 103:17

Hear this, you elders;
    listen, all who live in the land.
Has anything like this ever happened in your days
    or in the days of your ancestors?
Tell it to your children,
    and let your children tell it to their children,
    and their children to the next generation.— Joel 1:2-3

[Tweet “Even though Grandparents Day is on your calendar, just like Mothers Day and Fathers Day, few families recognize it, or even know about it.”]

Even though you’ll find Grandparents Day is on your calendar, just like Mothers Day and Fathers Day, few families recognize it, or even know about it. Our young Minister of Education at church announced that it must be a real holiday because it’s on the calendar so they’re having a root beer float celebration after service on Grandparents Day September 8. Many of the grandmothers will be at our women’s retreat, but I thought it was so sweet that she planned a celebration for grandparents.

My friend, Lillian Penner is the founder of Grandparenting with Purpose, an organization that encourages grandparents to pray for their grandchildren and invest in their lives. They work hard to bring awareness of Grandparents Day to the public as a reminder of how valuable the older generation’s wisdom and perspective is to the younger generations. So often, I hear that the kids won’t listen or aren’t interested in spending time with their grandparents, but Dave and I haven’t found that to be the case as long as we make an effort to be relevant in our grandchildren’s lives.

And we can pray for them. Lillian has written a sweet book, Grandparenting with a Purpose: Effective Ways to Pray for your GrandchildrenIn my quiet time, I pray for our eleven grandchildren. I have their pictures in my devotional and I journal a note to God about what’s happening in their lives. He knows what they need each day.

Last week, I wrote a guest blog, Brave Grandparenting, on Lillian Penner’s Grandparenting with a Purpose website. You might want to stop by and leave a comment and enter the drawing for a signed copy of Everyday Brave.

What are your thoughts on why a day as important as celebrating grandparents and their value to the family never got traction?

PS If you’re wondering why my Monday Morning Blog is coming to you on Tuesday, I was hoping you would all be spending time with family on Labor Day and not reading your email! Maybe you were even with grandparents or grandkids.

If you received this blog by email, please leave a comment here.

One more week until the release of Everyday Brave: Living Courageously As a Woman of Faith, but you can pre-order NOW.

Let's Be Everyday Believers

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7 Tested Tips for Moms of Teens by Letitia Suk

Letitia Suk is a guest on the Monday Morning Blog today with some great advice for moms of teens and tweens from her book Need-to-Know Tips for Moms of Tweens and Teens. This is a delightful and practical guide for grandparents too. As I was reading, I thought about my thirteen-year old granddaughter who was coming with her friend to stay with us for a week. Our tendency is to fall back on our own parenting style with the next generation, but I knew I could learn a few tips, and I did. Leave a comment for a chance to enter the drawing to win this precious book!

My new book Everyday Brave: Living Courageously as a Woman of Faith is now available for preorder on Amazon. Mothering tweens and teens is a courageous and brave endeavor that I know we would all agree we couldn’t do without the help of God. Chapter 7 is “Brave Mothers.” 

7 Tested Tips for Moms of Teens

by Letitia Suk

7 Tested Tips for Moms of Teens

Parents and teens will clash, often! If you are a parent of a teen, you have been on both ends of the clash at some point in your life. Remember?

As much as it feels challenging to get through this roller coaster season of parenting, choose the long view. This current crisis will pass but your relationship with your teen lasts the rest of your life.

[Tweet “One of the primary tasks of parenting teens is to establish a bond of closeness that can be drawn on for the long journey ahead.”]

Your pediatrician might not have mentioned it, butone of the primary tasks of parenting teens is to establish a bond of closeness that can be drawn on for the long journey ahead.

Hard as it is to believe, most of the years spent with our child in our lifetime will be in an adult-adult relationship that will outlast these exciting, fun-filled, and often challenging years.

[Tweet “Most of the years spent with our child in our lifetime will be in an adult-adult relationship”]

Looking for help?

If you need some help today, 100 Need-to-Know Tips for Moms of Tweens & Teens is a grab and go guide to read along the way. Each short, stand-alone tip provides an immediate opportunity to strengthen your relationship with your teen for both now and for the decades ahead.

Here is a sample of some of the tips you can try right now. 

  1. Keep Texts Friendly.

Chances are your teen prefers texting to most other forms of communication. Choosing to use this tool in a friendly way is a great way to stay in touch. Tell them you love them and are praying for their test. Ask them if they need anything from Walmart or send fun tidbits of information. TM can also be used to ask questions like when will the car be back? Will you be home for dinner? Could you please pick up a gallon of milk?

Decide that you will only use this creative tool for positive thoughts or simple questions. This is not the vehicle to complain (the kitchen is a wreck), criticize (you never leave gas in the car), or accuse (you were out too late last night). Keep it upbeat and they’ll want to keep opening their inbox.

  1. Ditch the Dread.

“Wait till they’re teenagers!” was the foreboding warning that awaited me on almost every turn of the stroller. “Wait till they start mouthing off” or “Wait till they get to high school” or “Wait till they get their driver’s license” have been part of the mom to mom network from the playground to the boardroom. It was never clear what the wait was for, it didn’t have the same hopeful note as waiting to go on vacation.

[Tweet “Instead of expecting the worst, start the day with a hope and a prayer that your teen is going to be OK.”]

            Instead of expecting the worst, start the day with a hope and a prayer that your teen is going to be OK.

Talk back to your inner critic and tell her you’re doing just fine as a mom. Don’t let moments of doubt turn into dread-fests. Be the voice of the yay-sayer instead of the naysayer to other moms. Expect the best and wait for it to come!

  1. Wave the White Flag.

If you are the parent of a teen, you have engaged in some conflict. In fact, you might have instigated it or inflamed it. It is never too late to wave the white flag and start a round of peace talks in your family. Someone needs to step up and stop yelling, door   slamming, or silent treatment. Might as well be you!

Calling for peace is not glossing over incidents but acknowledging your part in the current conflict. “I was angry, and I insulted your character, I’m sorry.” “I was tired, and I yelled at you. That wasn’t fair.” Asking for forgiveness is also a huge step but necessary to move on.

[Tweet “Conflicts will come and go but the relationship is forever.”]

Conflicts will come and go but the relationship is forever.

What your teen sees from you in the way of how to do resolution will shape their future interactions as well.

4. Leave on a positive note.

When your teen leaves the house for an outing with friends, make a point to say have a good time, you look great, I love you.

[Tweet “The last few minutes of your interaction with your teen can set the tone for the rest of the evening.”]

The last few minutes of your interaction with your teen can set the tone for the rest of the evening.

If your teen leaves the house feeling good about you and about themselves, they will carry those positive feelings with them. Likewise, if they leave home angry, feeling misunderstood, or belittled, those feelings may shape their evening. If you really want to make a lasting impression, occasionally slip a little unasked-for cash!

  1. Avoid Micro-Managing Your Teen’s Faith.

It has been said that “God has no grandchildren” meaning we each have our own faith experience separate from our parents. In our spiritually aware culture, most teens are searching for something/someone to believe in. Your teen’s faith journey might parallel yours, lag behind, or leap ahead. Most likely, it will not be identical just as your faith experience is not the same as your parents.

[Tweet “Your role as a parent is to provide spiritual training for your children, but not to force their faith development.”]

            Your role as a parent is to provide spiritual training but not to force their faith development.

In these teen years, you can nurture your teen’s faith by your prayers, your example, your encouragement, and trust God to work out the big picture. Keep in mind, his timing is rarely the same as ours.

  1. Differentiate Between Rules and Policies.

Try less rules, more policies. A policy has flex to it, a rule is fixed. Use policies for the minors of life such as room cleaning, late phone calls, attendance at family events, established study times, etc. A policy can be changed by request, “I need to talk to Sara tonight, but she won’t be home till 10:30. Can I call her later?” You: “OK, thanks for asking.” Exception given, policy still in place.

Rules, however, cover the majors and are not flexible. No point in your teen asking if they can have a party when you’re out of town. Ditto, there won’t be an exception as to whether they can drink and drive or have a sleepover with their boyfriend/girlfriend. Policies can be created on the spot and revised often. Keep the actual rules very few and very clear.

Remember, rules without relationship can lead to rebellion. 

[Tweet “Remember, rules without relationship can lead to rebellion in children.”]

  1. Bless their Friends, Even the Ones You Don’t Like.

You won’t like all your teens’ friends. Usually announcing that you don’t like a friend quickly elevates this person into sainthood in your teen’s life. The secret is not to let your feelings be known unless your teen is in danger or serious risk from a “friend.”

Find something, anything to comment on positively about the friend. “I like the way ____    is passionate about causes, knows a lot about music, isn’t afraid to be different.” then you might say something casually like, “I am a little concerned about his/her ____(driving?, ditching school? lying? poor relationship with parents, etc.” (choose only one) then follow with, “What do you think about that? Listen and don’t comment. Very hard tactic to follow but so worth it. Wait it out and see if your impression was wrong or your teen recognizes it’s not a healthy relationship. It almost always happens.

Interested in reading more?

Ninety-two more tips are available in 100 Need-to-Know Tips for Moms of Tweens & Teens (Ellie Claire/Hachette, 2019.) Beautifully designed with inspirational quotes on motherhood interspersed throughout, this book makes an excellent gift for yourself or a friend.

Which of these tips did you need today? 

Have you used any of these tips successfully?

Please leave a comment here for a chance to win a free sign copy of 100 Need-to-Know Tips for Moms of Tweens and Teens.

About the Author:

7 tested Tips for Moms of Teens

Letitia Suk invites women to chase the intentional life. She is the author of 100 Tips for Moms of Tweens and Teens, Getaway with God: The Everywoman’s Guide to Personal Retreat & Rhythms of Renewal. Letitia’s Amazon page

She and her husband, Tom, live in the Chicago area and are parents of four grown children. Letitia’s Website

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Where Have All the “Ladies” Gone?

woman sitting on ground

Do you remember a time when men showed respect to women?

They held doors open for her.

Opened the car door and then stayed around to close it after she was settled inside.

Helped her on with her jacket.

Weren’t afraid to give her a compliment when she looked nice and she appreciated it.

Cleaned up their language around her.

Made sure buddies cleaned up their language too, and didn’t tell off-color jokes.

Would never speak disparagingly to her or about her.

Acted like a gentleman in her presence.

Asked her out on dates and paid for it.

Then came the feminist movement . . .

Women asserted that they could open doors and car doors themselves thank you very much. She could struggle into her own jacket, a compliment was sexual harassment, and she could swear and tell dirty jokes with the best of them. And don’t insult her by offering to pay for the date. She could pay her own way! Oh, but she will hookup with you.

And the feminist women got just what they wanted. Men no longer respect them; they treat women as one of the guys. Nothing special. Feminist replaced feminine.

Men aren’t gentlemen anymore and women stopped being ladies.

[Tweet “With the feminist movement men aren’t gentlemen anymore and women stopped being ladies.”]

So we come to today when the women’s soccer team who, whether they like being women or not, represented the United States in the World Cup Championship. They were impressive on the field and repulsive off the field. One of the vocal team members used vile language in interviews and wanted everyone to know she hated the President, the flag, and being a heterosexual woman.

[Tweet “The USA women’s soccer team were impressive on the field and repulsive off the field.”]

And she’s not the only one. Most feminists today are constantly denouncing men, motherhood, conservatives, traditional marriage, and American traditions—even womanhood—especially acting like a lady. Some have decided they’ll try to be a man or at least act like one.

[Tweet “Most feminists today are constantly denouncing men, motherhood, conservatives, traditional marriage, and American traditions—even womanhood.”]

They’ve embraced the liberal agenda that is molding and making them frustrated and angry. How many liberal feminists do you know who aren’t screaming and mad about something? They’re not happy people, even though they got what they thought they wanted—to feel equal to or better than men.

[Tweet “How many liberal feminists do you know who aren’t screaming and mad about something? They’re not happy people!”]

What do you think God’s thoughts are on feminists? Did he make Adam out of Eve’s rib or Eve out of Adam’s rib? Did he say Adam would be Eve’s helpmate or Eve would be Adam’s helpmate?

So Where Are the Mentors Helping Young Women Become Ladies Today?

Remember when young girls followed the Hannah Montana image. I read that Mylie Cyrus said she was done with Hannah Montana after she had her first sexual encounter, and off she went on a radical transformation to smuttiness. So where did that leave the young girls who had idealized Hannah? Mylie felt no responsibility to them.

[Tweet “In today’s culture, I can’t think of one “famous” person I would want my granddaughters imitating. Can you for your daughters or granddaughters?”]

In today’s culture, I can’t think of one “famous” person I would want my granddaughters imitating. Can you for your daughters or granddaughters?

Where are all the ladies?

That puts the responsibility on home and the church to influence our future women. It’s where God has always said one generation should teach and train the next.

Let each generation tell its children of your mighty acts; let them proclaim your power. Psalm 145:4 NLT

God inspired Paul to understand the dire need for mentoring when Paul wrote in Titus 2:3-5

Similarly, teach the older women to live in a way that honors God. They must not slander others or be heavy drinkers.[a] Instead, they should teach others what is good. These older women must train the younger women to love their husbands and their children, to live wisely and be pure, to work in their homes,[b] to do good, and to be submissive to their husbands. Then they will not bring shame on the word of God. (NLT)

Parents and the church cannot let the culture mentor our girls or the lost art of being a kind, respectful, modest, God-honoring lady will be lost forever. How our girls dress, talk, act, date, live . . . is your and my God-directed responsibility.

[Tweet “Parents and the church cannot let the culture mentor our girls or the lost art of being a kind, respectful, modest, God-honoring lady will be lost forever.”]

In my book, Mentoring for All Seasons, I stress the importance of mentoring our young girls as early as pre-teens. We need to take an interest in the girls and young women God puts in our life to help them understand how special it is to be a woman after God’s own heart.

Let’s resurrect lady-likeness and make it fashionable again. It starts with every Christian woman acting like a lady. 

[Tweet “Let’s resurrect lady-likeness and make it fashionable again. It starts with every Christian woman acting like a lady.”]

Let’s have a discussion to help each other be ladies of the 21st Century!  What image does that conjure up to you?

Note: When I ran spell check on this article, it didn’t even recognize “lady” and wanted to change it to “woman.”

If you received this blog by email, please leave a comment here.

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Remembering the Reason for the Easter Season

Easter cross

My Easter post is coming to you a little early, but since I blog on Mondays, next Monday will be too late so hopefully you’ll have a week to ponder on the thoughts I share with you today.

A common aphorism at Christmas time is “Remember the Reason for the Season.” It’s a great reminder that Jesus, Our Savior, was born on Christmas day to come into the world as a baby to die as a man on a cross and resurrect three days later on Easter. So at Easter season, why don’t we say: “Remember the Reason for the Easter Season”?

[Tweet “At Easter season, why don’t we say: “Remember the Reason for the Easter Season””]

I don’t recall ever hearing that slogan used at Easter. Do you? It’s not on flags, banners, buttons we wear, or even Easter cards or mentioned in Easter sermons. I wonder why not?

[Tweet “The “Easter season” has similar distractions as Christmas that can take our focus off Jesus”]

Easter commemorates the foundation of our Christian faith. Without Easter, there would be no hope. And yet most sermons about the joy of Easter are relegated to Palm Sunday and Easter Sunday. Why don’t we talk about such a glorious day all year long?

[Tweet “Easter commemorates the foundation of our Christian faith. Without Easter, there would be no hope.”]

Easter is the reason we have forgiveness for our sins and the assurance of eternal life. As the apostle Paul reminded the Corinthians:

Let me now remind you, dear brothers and sisters of the Good News I preached to you before. You welcomed it then, and you still stand firm in it. It is this Good News that saves you if you continue to believe the message I told you—unless, of course, you believed something that was never true in the first place.

I passed on to you what was most important and what had also been passed on to me. Christ died for our sins, just as the Scriptures said. He was buried, and he was raised from the dead on the third day, just as the Scriptures said.—1 Cor. 15:1-4

In my book Forsaken God?:Remembering the Goodness of God Our Culture Has Forgotten, in the chapter on Remembering His Sacrifice, I wrote:

As Christians, we understand the extreme sacrifice God and Jesus endured: God gave his One and only Son who became the last sacrificial lamb dying in atonement for our sins. Jesus died a painful and horrific death on a cross for you and for me. At Easter, we celebrate Jesus’s resurrection three days later, and he lives today at the right hand of God—preparing a place for his followers who will someday join him in eternity. And he lives within the hearts of believers.

How could we ever forget such a sacrifice, but we do.

crucifixion

The “Easter season” has similar distractions as Christmas that can take our focus off Jesus and His sacrifice for you and for me. Our focus can turn to church services, performances, cantatas, pageants, new clothes, brunch, family gatherings, special dinners, decorating, egg hunts, Easter baskets . . . all good things. But before we know it . . . one of the most meaningful days of the year is over.

We probably went to church, said a prayer before meals, maybe even read some Bible passages about the Last Supper, Gethsemane, the Crucifixion, and the Resurrection. But did we take time to solemnly remember and praise God for the ultimate sacrifice of His Son Jesus Christ . . .

39 lashes

A crown of thorns

Hands and feet nailed to a cross

The 10,000 angels he could have called to rescue him

The world’s sins he took on himself

Feeling forsaken

The torn veil

Shed blood

The final cry, “It is finished!” (Pg. 217, Forsaken God?)

[Tweet “I pray this Easter season finds you refreshed and renewed in your relationship with Christ”]

I pray this Easter season finds you refreshed and renewed in your relationship with Christ, and the purpose He has given each of us to keep the memory of Easter alive and vibrant, every day in our hearts, speech, and actions. Let us never forget:

“You were dead because of your sins and because your sinful nature was not yet cut away. Then God made you alive with Christ, for he forgave all our sins. He canceled the record of the charges against us and took it away by nailing it to the cross.” Colossians 2:13-14 (NLT)

Hallelujah!

Happy Resurrection Day!

Janet

Other Easter Posts:

What Does the Moon Have to Do with Easter?

Share the Good News of Easter

How to Share the Easter Message with You Children and Grandchildren

If you received this post by email, leave a message here.

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How Not Mentoring Millennials Implodes a Political Party. What Can the Church Learn?

How Not Mentoring Millinnials Implodes a Political Party! What Can the Church Learn?

Let me say right from the beginning that this is not a political blog. But it is a blog about what happens politically, spiritually, and personally when generations don’t heed God’s instructions, Hear this, you elders; listen, all who live in the land. Has anything like this ever happened in your days or in the days of your ancestors? Tell it to your children, and let your children tell it to their children, and their children to the next generation. —Joel 1:2-3

I don’t have all the answers, but I do know the Man who does, Jesus Christ. The Lord knew everything we would encounter in life and in our country. There’s nothing new under the sun. The culture may change, but the Bible is timeless.

[Tweet “There’s nothing new under the sun. The culture may change, but the Bible is timeless.”]

Here’s what I do know. If we’re encountering a problem in our world, God gave us the answer. We just need to seek it out and apply it. I can’t find anywhere in God’s Word where we’re told that young people don’t need guidance, direction, and mentoring before they take on important and influential roles.

[Tweet “Young people need guidance, direction, and mentoring before they take on important and influential roles.”]

For those of us past the age of millennials, we were all their age once when we thought we knew everything and were ready to change the world. But God knew that it was important for us to temper our enthusiasm with wisdom from those who have gone before us, whether it’s in business, ministry, parenting, politics, or just living life.

[Tweet “The Bible and God tells us that one generation should teach and train the next generation”]

Throughout the Bible God repeatedly tells us that one generation should teach and train the next generation. Titus 2:1-8 is a familiar mentoring passage written to older and younger men and women. But so often neither generation, the young or the old, realizes the value of mentoring.

These men and women understood, Ask your father and he will tell you, your elders, and they will explain to you (Deut. 32:7).

  • Moses mentored Joshua before Joshua took over the role of leading the Israelites into the Promised Land.
  • Elijah mentored Elisha as his successor.
  • Barnabas mentored Paul and Paul mentored Titus, Timothy, and Mark.
  • Ruth followed Naomi and wanted to know her God.
  • Young Mary visited with her elderly relative Elizabeth as they both had miracle pregnancies.
  • Even though Saul was a bad king, David obeyed him until it was his time to be king and he learned from Saul how not to rule.

The younger people didn’t ignore or usurp their elders. They wanted to learn from them so that someday they would be ready for their God-given roles.

What Happens Without Mentoring?

In 1 Kings 12:1-24, a young son of Solomon, Rehoboam, tried to take on a leadership role he wasn’t ready to assume. His subjects implored him, “Your father put a heavy yoke on us, but now lighten the harsh labor and the heavy yoke he put on us, and we will serve you.”

Rehoboam told them to go away for three days and then he inquired of the elders who had served his father what he should do. They wisely replied, “If today you will be a servant to these people and serve them and give them a favorable answer, they will always be your servants.”

But Rehoboam rejected the advice the elders gave him and consulted the young men who had grown up with him and were serving him. He asked them, “What is your advice? How should we answer these people who say to me, ‘Lighten the yoke your father put on us’?”

10 The young men who had grown up with him replied, “These people have said to you, ‘Your father put a heavy yoke on us, but make our yoke lighter.’ Now tell them, ‘My little finger is thicker than my father’s waist. 11 My father laid on you a heavy yoke; I will make it even heavier. My father scourged you with whips; I will scourge you with scorpions.’”

Do you remember who he listened to? The wise elders or his arrogant young friends?

Yes, he took the advice of the young inexperienced entitled young men who were looking for power with Rehoboam, not what was best for the people.

The people said forget it then. We’re leaving. Those who stayed, rebelled against Rehoboam and he barely got away with his life.

We’re seeing something similar happen with the Congressional Democrats. Young, freshmen millennial women, who weren’t mentored or given wise counsel in how to be a constructive team player in Congress, came into office with their own agendas discounting the experience of those who went before them.

[Tweet “Instead of senior Congressional leaders reining in the freshmen for some mentoring, they seem intimidated”]

But instead of the senior Congressional leaders acting as mentors for the freshmen, they seem to be intimidated by them. The experienced elders are cowering to the inexperienced Millennials. They’re letting these three women set the agenda as ridiculous, rude, radical, and rudimentary as it is. They’re even letting one proclaim she’s “the boss,” and it looks like she is.

Why are Democrat presidential hopefuls endorsing the harmful philosophies of these three women instead of educating them on the pitfalls and dangers of Socialism and anti-semitism? Because the freshmen are getting more attention and press so the contenders for the party nomination feel they must join them, even if it means destroying America.

How could older legislators let the young immature legislators come in as wrecking balls and then bow down to them? Why? Because the seniors think this is what they have to do to get the millennial vote. Sell their souls and the good of the country for party power even as they lose their personal power.

[Tweet “Democrats are immobilized by their own identity politics.”]

The Democrats are immobilized by their own identity politics. Now they can’t seem to discipline or restrain the three women “of color” (which now just means not white) for fear of being called misogynist, Islamophobic, or racist. The same slurs they sling at Conservatives are boomeranging to haunt them.

Three freshmen Congresswomen are in charge while the elders are impotent. And just like the story of Rehoboam . . . they could soon see their party running for its life.

I don’t think this is how Millennials want to be wooed. They’re smarter than this. I don’t think we all raised a generation of arrogant, entitled, foolish, disrespectful, loud-mouthed young people. If I’m wrong and these three women are representative of the next generation, then our country will be in a steady dissent. If the older generation is afraid to confront them, they will indeed be a generation that watches their accomplishments disintegrate.

[Tweet “The older generation’s legacy will be that they tried to please the next generation instead of taking the time to mentor them.”]

What Can the Church Learn About the Importance of Mentoring the Next Generation?

I pray the older generation’s legacy in the culture and in the church will not be that they tried to please the next generation instead of taking the time to mentor them, love on them, and show them how to live godly lives in an ungodly culture.

Mentor them don’t ignore them.

Mentor them don’t appease them.

Do the young people in your church know about the evils of Socialism, anti-Semitism, abortion, and infanticide? Or is your church letting the culture and liberal media brainwash them?

We need to speak out against the wave of anti-Semitism, and yet, so far the only Christian leader I’ve heard denounce it is Governor Mike Huckabee in his monologue for his program on TBN.

It’s the church’s responsibility to educate the next generation, so that the evils of the past don’t become their future.

[Tweet “It’s the church’s responsibility to educate the next generation.”]

Mentor them about the fallacies and faults of Socialism. 

Show them that Socialism isn’t free, but you will lose your freedoms.

[Tweet “Socialism isn’t free, but you will lose your freedoms.”]

[Tweet “Each generation is responsible for the actions of the next generation.”]

Each generation is responsible for the actions of the next generation. What did we teach or not teach them? What kind of role models were we? How much time did we spend molding them into responsible citizens? They’re our legacy. Our responsibility. If we’re alarmed at what’s going on today, we have to ask ourselves: How did we let this happen?

I’ve stressed so often in blogs like this one that Generation Gaps Were Never Part of God’s Plan! In my book Mentoring for All Seasons: Sharing Life Experiences and God’s Faithfulness, I give ideas of how the generations can learn from each other and work together, just as God planned for us to do.

I encourage you to read my blog for Crosswalk: The Forgotten Link Between Seniors and Discipleship/Church Growth.

If you’re a Millennial, I would love to hear your thoughts. How can we reach your generation with the Gospel of Jesus Christ and help them be ready to take over the responsibility of running our free Democratic country, without ruining it with Socialism or Communism? How can we prepare them to continue God’s earthly kingdom and His church?

In an Op-ed Newt Gingrich writes about what he sees happening between the congressional generations: “To the new Democrats, the leaders are like the grandparents. And I don’t mean this in a positive way that could foster an opportunity for maternal or paternal mentorships.” Instead, “these new Democrats are throwing a party – and the grandparents aren’t invited.”

“One generation commends your works to another, they tell of your mighty acts.” Psalm 145:4

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