When You’re Mom #2

As many of you know, Dave and I are a blended family. Our children were all in their teens when we married and I thought it would be smooth sailing, but we definitely had many challenges. With Christ at the center of our marriage, and agreeing that divorce would NEVER be an option, praise God we made it through and our sweet kids are all brothers and sisters in Christ and in family.

But during the difficult years, I longed for someone to mentor me from the perspective of “been there done that, made it through with Christ and you will too” and I’ll pray for you and help you. But I never found that mentor. I bought the few Christian books there were for step families and Dave and I joined a support group at church. I would have gone to a retreat in a heartbeat. I know Laura Petherbridge personally as a friend and fellow author and speaker, and if you’re a stepmom you will enjoy her book and this retreat. If you know stepmoms or have a support group at your church, please share this blog post.

Laura is giving away a copy of her book, 101 Tips for the Smart Stepmom so leave a comment to enter the drawing and check the box to receive follow up emails to this post so we can let you know if you won, or check back on Friday. We’ve given away a book a week all month. I love it.

Helping Hurting Women

By Laura Petherbridge

“Please remove my name from your mailing list,” the woman’s email requested. “I am no longer a stepmom.”

My heart sank as I finished her note. Divorce. Again. She became one of the census statistics which reports that 60-73% of stepfamilies fail.

I cried out to God, “Lord, one more marriage gone. One more home fractured. One more child believing, ‘marriage doesn’t work’ because he/she has now witnessed two demolished families.”

“Lord, help me to reach stepmoms before it’s too late. Please, show me how to provide help, healing and hope. They need a spa for their weary soul, they need a—RETREAT!!”

Last year when I had the idea to conduct a stepmom retreat, I assumed it would be a one-time event. I asked a few stepmom sisters who offered a similar stepmom outreach to join me. And that one step, that one decision, has rocked my world.

We Can’t Stop Now

Since I’ve written two books for Stepmoms I’ve gotten used to them emailing me for help, but now at the retreat they were in my arms. Their tears, pending divorces, and the voices of their hurting children, were looking me in the eyes. And their begging pleas, “I’m afraid I might not make it. I feel like a failure. Show me how to survive life in a stepfamily,” could not be silenced in my head.

“What are we going to do now?” was the question each teammate asked as we ate lunch together after the retreat.

“We can’t stop now,” one team member shared. “We must do more of these events, more stepmoms need our help.”

And so with no money, no sponsor, no guidebook to follow, and no website established, we launched a ministry, Sisterhood of Stepmoms.

Within two weeks of establishing a Facebook page we had 700 likes, and now one year later, it’s over 2400. Stepmoms from everywhere began sharing how grateful they were to receive help and a place to find healing.

The Church Typically Doesn’t Understand

[Tweet “The church rarely has a ministry that meets the needs of stepmoms.”]

The church rarely has a ministry that meets the needs of stepmoms.

“I went to a mom’s conference, and a women’s retreat geared for families, but none of the issues they addressed applied to my situation,” stepmom Lisa shared.

“I need to know how to parent alongside my stepson’s mother. She lives very differently than we do, with completely diffident view of what is right and wrong. Plus I can’t figure out how to handle my husband’s inability to discipline his kids. Even though his ex-wife is the one who left the marriage for another man, he is plagued by guilt because his kids are from a divorced home.”

[Tweet ” A ministry specifically designed for stepfamilies, which can address their unique issues is a huge need. “]

This is why a ministry specifically designed for stepfamilies, which can address their unique issues is a huge need. Many statistics show that there are more stepfamilies in the USA today than there are first time families. They avoid the church because there isn’t a place for them.

God Has Other Plans

Before this stepmom mentoring occurred, I kept asking God for a “nice, clean” women’s ministry. You know something with pink ribbons and flowing butterflies. I was seeking a ministry that the annual church women’s luncheon would eagerly embrace for their keynote.

Wrong.

God had other plans, and I’m so glad. Whether it’s; the childhood shame and trauma associated with my parent’s divorce, the devastation when my husband walked out of our marriage, or the stress of being a stepmom, the wounds of my past provide me with the insight to mentor, encourage, or instruct others. When given to Jesus, my scars serve a higher calling. The destruction is transformed into a restoration for another.

I’m thrilled to be on this journey. Here’s another email that explains why. It reads differently than the previous.

“Dear Laura, Thank you for your ministry to stepmoms. I want you to know it saved my marriage. I was on the verge of divorce; I couldn’t take stepfamily living anymore. And you taught me that with God’s help I can learn how to live above the circumstances. You offered practical, no-nonsense, real life information which changed my attitude and perspective. You gave me tools and hope. My husband immediately noticed, and now I think we will make it.”

It doesn’t get any better than that.

[Tweet “The next retreat, geared for ANY women who is a single parent or dating, engaged or married to a man with kids (young or old), is April 17-19th,”]

The next retreat, geared for ANY women who is a single parent or dating, engaged or married to a man with kids (young or old), is April 17-19th, at the gorgeous Sandy Cove Retreat Center.

What Can YOU Do?

Won’t YOU be the one to reach out to a stepmom, and show her where to find help, healing and hope?

Leave a comment to enter drawing for a free book. Be sure to check the box to receive follow up comments to this post or check back on Friday to see if you won!

Laura Petherbridge is an international author and speaker who serves couples and single adults with topics on relationships, step-parenting, divorce prevention, and divorce recovery. She is the author of 101 Tips for The Smart Stepmom—Expert Advice from One Stepmom to Another and When “I Do” Becomes “I Don’t”—Practical Steps for Healing During Separation and Divorce, and a featured expert on the DivorceCare DVD series. Her book The Smart Stepmom, is co-authored with stepfamily expert Ron Deal. Her website is www.TheSmartStepmom.com

March 23, 2015

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What to Do When Your Child is Sad

Joanne Kraft, a fellow The M.O.M Initiative mentor mom, has a new book out The Mean Mom’s Guide to Raising Great Kids. I asked her to share with you a snippet from her book. No matter how old your child is, it’s hard to see him or her sad or unhappy. The mom in you wants to fix everything and make them happy again. But as Joanne reminds us, sometimes you just need to let them cry.

Joanne uses an example from Mary and Martha that I also share in my Bible study, Face-to-Face with Mary and Martha: Sisters in Christ. Jesus cried right along with them when their brother Lazarus died, but God had a bigger plan then they could see at the immediate moment. Teaching our children how to deal with disappointments and discouragement might just be God’s plan for us stepping out of the way and letting them cry.

Leave a comment below for a chance to win a copy of The Mean Mom’s Guide to Raising Great Kids. Be sure to check the box “Notify me of follow-up comments by email” so you’ll know if you won the book.

Let Them Cry

By Joanne Kraft

My teenage son walked down the stairs with a frown on his face. College classes have gotten the best of him it seems. My pep talk with him yesterday apparently wasn’t as good as I thought it was. My future as a motivational speaker went down in a fizzle.

When I brought my first child home from the hospital, cries were immediately met with a soothing rub and my full attention until the whimpers quieted. From baby tears to teenage sulking, I want to make my child happy. I’ve exhausted myself trying to make this happen. I’ve finally realized I can’t make any of my kids happy.

[Tweet “You may be doing something wrong—when you’re exhausting yourself doing it.”]

Here’s the clue you may be doing something wrong—when you’re exhausting yourself doing it.

Years ago, when my mom watched me try to stop my kids from shedding tears she gave me my first golden bit of wisdom, “Let them cry. It’s okay. They will be fine.”

When Mary and Martha sent word to Jesus that their brother Lazarus had died, Jesus didn’t come that very day but waited two more days before heading back to them in Judea. When he arrived, he discovered the funeral had already taken place. Lazarus had been dead four days and two very heartbroken sisters who had been crying for days were in deep mourning.

Not only were Mary and Martha in tears, but it’s in this passage of Scripture where we find the shortest sentence in the Bible—Jesus wept. Two words packed with incredible meaning. Even our Savior shed tears. Even He felt sad.

Here’s a few things I learned to do when my toddlers or teenagers were hurt or sad.

Let them hurt. Is there anything more contrary to mothering than allowing a child to cry or hurt? But, it’s much needed for their development. Come alongside and give them a hug or sympathize, “Yes, I know you’re sad.” Or, “It’s okay to be sad. Sometimes mommy is sad, too.” And if a child is older, maybe you can empathize, “I understand how hard this is for you.” Or, “I’m sorry you’re going through this.” Follow up with a personal story of your own about a past hurt or grievance.
Let them heal. Give them a little time. Don’t let their hurt sabotage your life. Give them space but look for signs of healing: interest in friends, playing again, laughter, an appetite, and conversation.
Let them lean. When a child is young, they lean on mom and dad for everything. As they grow older we need to let go so they can lean on God. I can’t expect my adult child to have BIG faith if they have little experience in leaning on a BIG GOD. If I answer their every whim and whimper, I become God in their eyes. Do you want to grow their faith? Let them lean on the only ONE who can meet and exceed their expectations. (Psalm 62:5)

[Tweet “Mom you’re not a magic fairy spreading joyful pixie-dust over your child’s every hurt”].

I have to remind myself, my daughters and sons must feel pain while in my keep. God grows us through pain. How else will they know how to navigate life’s storms as adults? So, precious mamas, let your child cry today. Let them hurt and let them heal and make sure to let them lean on God. Scripture reminds us there’s “A time to cry and a time to laugh. A time to grieve and a time to dance.” (Ecclesiastes 3:4) Maybe, today it’s time to let them cry. I promise they’ll be okay.

[Tweet “I have to remind myself, my daughters and sons must feel pain while in my keep.”]

“A time to cry and a time to laugh. A time to grieve and a time to dance.” (Ecclesiastes 3:4)

Joanne Kraft is a mom of four and the author of Just Too Busy—Taking Your Family on a Radical Sabbatical and her latest book The Mean Mom’s Guide to Raising Great Kids. She’s been a guest on Focus on the Family, Family Life Today, and her articles have appeared in ParentLife, In Touch, P31 Woman and more. Joanne and her husband, Paul, recently moved their family from California to Tennessee and happily traded soy milk and arugula for sweet tea and biscuits. Visit her at JoanneKraft.com.
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Leave a comment to enter into a drawing for a free copy of The Mean Mom’s Guide to Raising Great Kids. Be sure to check the box “notify me by email of updates” so you will know if you won.

March 16, 2015

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What Does the Moon Have to Do With Easter?

With Easter fast approaching, I knew you would all find this guest post by Linda Rooks fascinating. I know I did! You’ll want a copy of her new book The Bunny Side of Easter for all the kids in your family. Leave a comment below to enter a drawing for a copy!

Connecting the Easter Bunny to the True Meaning of Easter

By Linda Rooks

Easter comes on April 5 this year. So in about a month it will once again be time for Easter baskets, colored eggs, and the celebration of the resurrection.

I imagine several of you are even now checking to make sure you’ve got it down on your calendars. Chances are that like me, you may have trouble keeping up with the date for Easter each year. Last year, Easter came late at the end of April, and the year before, Easter came at the end of March. Ever wonder why the discrepancy? Why the date changes from year to year?

The Significance of the Moon

The date for Easter differs each year because it’s determined by the moon. Easter always comes on the first Sunday after the first full moon after the advent of spring. When I first discovered this, I became fascinated with how this came to be and why the lunar calendar plays such a significant part.

[Tweet “God uses His creation to speak to us in many ways. “]

The way that God’s creation meshes with our daily life is always a thing of wonder to me. God uses His creation to speak to us in many ways. He used the star to guide the magi to the manger where Jesus was born. He uses the rainbow as a promise that he would never again destroy us. He uses the seasons as well as seeds that sprout into living things to teach us about life, death, and resurrection. Jesus even said that if the people did not turn out with their Hallelujahs to praise him on Palm Sunday that the rocks would have cried out in praise instead.

So when I discovered that not only did the moon determine the date for Easter, but ancient storytellers in the East had seen a rabbit in the moon, I became even more fascinated. Could all this connect with the Easter bunny somehow?

A Story of Faith, Compassion, and Courage

I never did find an answer to that question, but when I decided to write an Easter book for children, the moon became part of the story, and, of course, the rabbit in the moon had to play a part as well. For what I further discovered is that in the shadowy patches of the full moon, I could actually see the image of a rabbit. His body is on the left side of the moon and his ears are at the top. I even borrowed a little from the ancient storytellers to tell the story. But the moon is only a small part of the story . . .because the thrust of this little adventure focuses on a story of faith, compassion, and courage that turned an ordinary rabbit into a hero and taught an angel about God’s omnipresent love and the power of prayer.

The heroic bunny became the Easter bunny and as a result he got to go to the moon and become the rabbit on the moon.

Fun, huh?

[Tweet “In the shadowy patches of the full moon, I could actually see the image of a rabbit “]

The story begins on Easter eve when three animals—a mischievous rabbit, a plucky duck and a playful monkey become lost and must face a fearsome tiger. A little angel is kind to them, but her doubts about God’s omnipresence put her in danger when a fearsome tiger emerges on the scene. The question then becomes: can the three animals save themselves and the little angel who was kind to them? Will the angel discover the truth about her power? The bunny comes to the rescue to save her even though it may mean sacrificing his own life to do so. His act of heroism makes him the Easter bunny. The Bunny Side of Easter is a tale of fears faced, friendships gained, and faith discovered.

[Tweet “On Easter you may feel a disconnect between the Easter bunny and the real meaning of Easter.”]

On Easter morning, when you watch your children scurry about the yard looking for Easter eggs, you may feel a disconnect between the legend of the Easter bunny and the real meaning of Easter. If so, The Bunny Side of Easter can fill the gap, taking children on an exciting and charming adventure with hints of allegory that point children to the true significance of Easter.

And when the next full moon appears, take your children out under the nighttime sky to look for the rabbit in the moon. Together, you can make a fun new discovery that will likely become a monthly ritual and a delight to all.

As author of The Bunny Side of Easter, Linda W. Rooks takes her life-long love of children’s books and uses it to tell a winsome, but exciting adventure that points children to the real meaning of Easter. Her first adult book, Broken Heart on Hold, was published in 2006 and continues to minister to women in broken marriages. Linda’s writing has appeared in a number of national publications, including Chicken Soup for the Beach Lover’s Soul, Focus on the Family, Today’s Christian Woman and HomeLife. She has appeared as a guest many times on TV and radio talk shows across the North American continent.

Leave a comment to enter drawing for copy of The Bunny Side of Easter. It would make a great Easter gift!

March 9, 2015

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Women Need Each Other

Today’s guest post is by my good friend and fellow The MOM Initiative mentor mom, Lori Wildenberg. Lori is talking about several of my favorite topics: women helping each other, friendships of women, Woman to Woman Mentoring, parenting, and the relationship between Mary and Elizabeth, which I wrote about in Face-to-Face with Elizabeth and Mary: Generation to Generation. Lori is giving away a copy of one of her new books if you leave a comment on this post. I know you’re going to want to read them both and I endorsed Raising Big Kids with Supernatural Love. Enjoy!

Women Need Each Other (Plus a Give-Away)

by Lori Wildenberg

My friend Kathy has greatly impacted me over the years. Kathy and I met in high school. She got married a few years before I did and had her first child about five years before I had mine. When I had parenting questions, her bigger perspective was so helpful. Yet she wasn’t so far ahead of me that she lacked empathy for my parenting concerns.

She would say to me, “Oh, just think of it. Three is still pretty little,” when I would lament over my child’s lack of potty-progress.

I have always been able to count on Kathy for sound advice.

She is generous with her wisdom. (I eat it up.)

She is a good listener. (I feel heard.)

She embraces confidentiality. (I feel safe.)

She speaks with honesty and love. ( I trust her.)

And I know she prays for me. (I am grateful.)

Gone are the days of neighborhood coffee parties and regular extended-family gatherings (at least for many of us). But women are still wired to need each other.

[Tweet “Women are wired to need each other.”]

Mary, after learning she was pregnant with Jesus, went to see her older cousin Elizabeth. Mary needed support and wisdom. Elizabeth provided both.

At that time Mary got ready and hurried to a town in the hill country of Judea, where she entered Zechariah’s home and greeted Elizabeth. When Elizabeth heard Mary’s greeting, the baby leaped in her womb, and Elizabeth was filled with the Holy Spirit.In a loud voice she exclaimed: “Blessed are you among women, and blessed is the child you will bear^.But why am I so favored, that the mother of my Lord should come to me? As soon as the sound of your greeting reached my ears, the baby in my womb leaped for joy. Blessed is she who has believed that the Lord would fulfill his promises to her!” (Luke 1:39- 45).

We desire to learn from and to lean on one another.

[Tweet “We desire to learn from and to lean on one another.”]

Recently I spoke to a MOPS (Mothers of Preschoolers) group. In my talk, I encouraged the women to be the mom God designed them to be.

[Tweet “Find a mentor. A peer with perspective. Or a seasoned sister.”]

One of the ways this can be done is to find a mentor; maybe a peer with perspective like my friend Kathy or possibly a more seasoned mentor like Mary’s relative, Elizabeth. It’s a biblical concept to have or to be a Titus woman (Titus 2:3-4). I guess that is why mentoring never goes out of style!

[Tweet “Avoid having the mentoring time look more like a gripe session”]

As a final thought, to avoid having the mentoring time look more like a gripe session, use a tool to steer your conversation. Of course my co-authored books, Raising Little Kids with Big Love or Raising Big Kids with Supernatural Love are not the only resources out there. But I do believe they are good ones because each book has a companion study guide.

If you are a mom, I encourage you to find a Titus woman or to be one for someone else. It is a blessing for both.

[Tweet “Find a Titus woman or to be one for someone else.”]

I still count on my friend, Kathy for her sage advice. She’s now a grandmom. I’m not there yet, but when I am, I know who I’m “gonna call.”

So… women, who can you support and encourage? Whom would you like to have support and encourage you?

Love Your Body with a Pure Mind

Love Your Body Like God Loves It

In our Love Your Body series the last Monday of the month, I’ve been focusing on ways to eat healthy and exercise regularly. But today I want to talk about a part of the body we haven’t discussed, our mind. Yes, our mind is a part of our body and our mind determines what we put into our body, as well as what we do with our body.

[Tweet “Our mind is a part of our body, and our mind determines what we put into our body as well as what we do with our body.”]

A Pure Mind is a Healthy Mind

[Tweet “We can’t have a healthy body, without having a healthy mind.”]

We can’t have a healthy body, without having a healthy mind. That’s why Paul warned that when we become Christians: “Do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is—his good, pleasing and perfect will.” Romans 12:2

If you have a healthy pure mind, you’ll be able to test for yourself what God wants you eating, thinking, watching, reading, and doing. But…

Those who live according to the flesh have their minds set on what the flesh desires; but those who live in accordance with the Spirit have their minds set on what the Spirit desires. The mind governed by the flesh is death, but the mind governed by the Spirit is life and peace. Romans 8:5-6

If you will, “Set your minds on things above, not on earthly things” (Colossians 3:2), you’ll never have to worry about dealing with a sick or impure mind.

Satan Wants You to Have a Sick Mind

In the past few weeks, there’s been lots of discussion about the book and movie Fifty Shades of Grey–whether or not it’s OK for Christians to read the book and see the movie. Looking at the Scriptures above, it’s hard for me to imagine that this would even be a conversation. The answers are so clear in the Bible.

You can eat organic, omit sugar, limit your red meat, get your daily quota of fruits and veggies, drink lots of water, and exercise every day, but you will never have a healthy body if you feed your mind with trash and smut.

[Tweet “You will never have a healthy body if you feed your mind with trash and smut.”]

[Tweet “Satan has worked hard at luring men into pornography and now he’s working on the women.”]

Satan has worked hard at luring men into pornography and now he’s working on the women. Sadly, Satan is having as much success with women as he did with the men. Movies and books like Fifty Shades of Grey are what the world today is calling entertainment. Don’t be deceived by the world, and don’t give the devil a foothold in your mind.

[Tweet “Don’t be deceived by the world, and don’t give the devil a foothold in your mind.”]

For everything in the world—the lust of the flesh, the lust of the eyes, and the pride of life—comes not from the Father but from the world. 1 John 2:16

Put to death, therefore, whatever belongs to your earthly nature: sexual immorality, impurity, lust, evil desires, and greed, which is idolatry. Colossians 3:5

What’s A Christian to Do?

I know I’m probably singing to the choir here, so what’s a Christian woman to do who agrees with everything I’m saying? Well Titus 2 1-6 in the The Message spells out clearly our job as Christian women and men. We have to speak out and help our fellow sisters in Christ who are being lured into Satan’s trap:

[Tweet “Titus 2 1-6 in the The Message spells out clearly what our job is as Christian women and men.”]

Your job is to speak out on the things that make for solid doctrine. Guide older men into lives of temperance, dignity, and wisdom, into healthy faith, love, and endurance. Guide older women into lives of reverence so they end up as neither gossips nor drunks, but models of goodness. By looking at them, the younger women will know how to love their husbands and children, be virtuous and pure, keep a good house, be good wives. We don’t want anyone looking down on God’s Message because of their behavior. Also, guide the young men to live disciplined lives.

If you are addicted to other “mommy porn” type books, and you think no one will know what you’re reading on your Kindle or tablet, just remember that God is with you always and He knows what’s going into your mind. It’s breaking God’s heart and Satan is laughing. Yes, Satan is laughing because he has you just where he wants you—he’s infiltrated your mind.

Confess your problem to someone and find a mentor to help you renew, refresh, and reboot your mind.

Satan is Working Hard and Fast

This is not the only movie and book out there that shouldn’t be polluting our minds, and I wrote about that in the blog post Oh Be Careful Little Eyes What You See.

Which Mother and Wife Won’t See 50 Shades of Grey?

I’m sure you figured out that I won’t, but two other women who don’t want their mind filled with “the lust of the flesh, the lust of the eyes” by seeing the film of the erotic novel are:

Actress Melanie Griffith, the mother of Dakota Johnson who plays the sexually brutalized young virgin in the movie. Mother Griffith said, “I would be very uncomfortable with it.”

Amelia Warner, the wife of Jamie Dornan who plays the sexually perverted lead actor, doesn’t want to watch her husband in the risqué sex scenes with another woman and won’t see the movie.

I totally understand why this mother and wife would not see this movie. What I don’t understand is why so many other mothers, wives, daughters, girlfriends, and future wives want to watch it as voyeurs. Can you?

Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things. Philippians 4:8

February 23, 2015

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Are You Parenting from Fear?

I had the privilege of endorsing the book Mothering from Scratch by Kathy Helgemo and Melinda Means, and I can assure you this is a book every mother wants to read. I met Kathy and Melinda at The MOM Initiative Better Together Conference in Jacksonville, FL last summer. Kathy took my workshop on Praying for Your Prodigal based on my book Praying for Your Prodigal Daughter. In today’s guest blog, Kathy shares the feelings that stirred in her while listening to me speak.

Breaking Free From Parenting Out of Fear

by Kathy Helgemo

I heard Janet talk at the Better Together conference last July on the topic of Parenting Your Prodigal. Once she started talking about parenting out of fear, I found myself sitting up. Listening. Wondering. Do I do that?

“Oh, really Janet.” I thought. “You must be talking to someone other than me.”

I don’t consider myself a scared person. I actually don’t consider myself a particularly anxious person either. So, I found it interesting when God started laying on my heart that this was a problem of mine. I don’t have this problem, remember?

But this day He revealed to me that I truly did. And I better pay attention. Pronto.

Parenting from a place of fear has more to do with us than our kids. Yet, they suffer the consequences. Ouch.

[Tweet “Parenting from a place of fear has more to do with us than our kids.”]

I don’t know about you, but I have trouble enjoying the good times on occasion. For years, I constantly worried about my kids repeating my mistakes. Not theirs — mine.

I have parented my children as if they were making the same mistakes I did — even when they weren’t making any at all. No wonder they felt like they were doing something wrong. Guilty. For nothing.

They weren’t doing anything in particular.

Sure I did it when I was their age.

But they didn’t.

And hopefully they won’t.

Here is some of the evidence that I found in myself about parenting with fear:

I made normal transitions into drama-filled experiences. Too much attention. Too much anxiety. It’s akin to keeping on the training wheels way too long because it’s easier than seeing scraped knees. It’s normal to stumble and fall.
I tried to control their relationships too much. I didn’t want them to get their feelings hurt or hang out with “the wrong kids”. After all, that’s what happened to me. However, they need friends and connection. They also need to learn how to discern the difference between good and bad influences.
I completely exaggerated everyday dangers. Here are some examples: strangers, alcohol, mean people, strange places. Dirt! For Pete’s sake. Those problems are not going to leave the planet anytime soon. I had an “all or nothing” attitude regarding some of them and it got out of control.
I worried about their achievements as if they were my own. How is this fearful? It’s the fear of failure. If we have struggled with the fear of failure ourselves, it’s so easy to project it onto our kids. For example, perhaps we were never a straight A student. We struggled just to get by on B’s and C’s. Suddenly, our kid’s excelling in school. Obsessing over of their grades becomes our focus. It’s much easier than to work through our own feelings of failing as a student.
I tried to prevent any kind of pain. We are their mothers! Gosh, darn it! We don’t want to see them in any kind of suffering. Unfortunately, that would prevent an awful lot of learning too. We can love them through anything. Teaching moments only happen when we get out of the way. Now, that’s scary!

Remember…

Love is the opposite of fear. Willing our child’s good above our own can be hard.

[Tweet “Love is the opposite of fear.”]

Staying in the place of fear, however, robs them of the security of knowing what real love is.

[Tweet “Parenting from fear robs children of security!”]

Let’s focus on loving our kids, giving them the security that their good is truly the center of our motives and actions.

And there you have it….

When are you parenting out of fear?

How can you break free and parent more from love?

What’s one area you can turn over your fear to God letting Him take control?

If you are receiving this blog by email, click here to leave a comment.

Kathy Helgemo blogs over at Mothering From Scratch. She co-wrote the book Mothering From Scratch: Finding the Parenting Style That Works for You and Your Family with Melinda Means. Together they support and encourage moms to develop their own mothering recipe.

February 16, 2015

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How to Have a Date with Jesus

Be My Valentine!

I know I don’t have to remind you that this Saturday is Valentine’s Day! A day we set aside for showing that special someone how much they mean to us. It can also be a difficult time for someone who doesn’t have an object of his or her affection to dote on or be the recipient of doting … but it doesn’t need to be a sad day for those who know Jesus as their First Love!

[Tweet “Valentine’s Day doesn’t need to be a sad day for those who know Jesus as their First Love!”]

My First Prayer Garden

[Tweet “My husband was not first in my love life, Jesus was.”]

Almost twenty years ago, the revelation hit me that even though I was happily married after being single for 17 years, my husband was not first in my love life, Jesus was. And shouldn’t I approach my special time with Jesus each day with the same attitude I would lavish on my earthly love, Dave. So I set about finding a special place to spend with my First Love every day and I called it my prayer garden. At this time, we were living in sunny Southern California so I could have my quiet time outside almost every day. I’ll share with you in a moment how I’ve carried on this date with Jesus in my new home of Idaho. Here is the story that I wrote in 2001 of how I initially created the special “date” atmosphere in California.

[Tweet “I set about finding a special place to spend with my First Love every day “]

Thinking of Jesus as the lover of my soul and the One I love above all others, gave me the idea of creating a romantic atmosphere for my daily “Quiet Time” with Jesus. It needed all the touches of a special date. First, it must be quiet and free of interruptions, so that meant outside. Since my backyard is all cement, I arranged colorful potted plants in a shaded alcove of the patio and hung a humming bird feeder. I placed a chair for Jesus and a chair for me with a small table in the center for a romantic fragrant candle. I later added wind chimes, and my son-in-law made a waterfall. Walla I had a Prayer Garden.

My Prayer Garden

My Date Bag with Jesus is always Packed

[Tweet “My Date Bag with Jesus is always packed”]

Then I pack a ‘date bag’ with my Bible, a journal, devotional, highlighters, pens, Post-it notes, current Bible Study, and oh yes, a lighter for the candle. One trip back into the house for something I forgot could be a major distraction.

My “Date Bag” with Jesus

First thing every morning, I grab my cup of coffee, my date bag, a blanket or sweater if it is chilly, and head out for my date with Jesus in our Prayer Garden. Here is a major key to intimate time with my First Love—I shut the door to ALL interruptions. The answering machine gets the phone, and the family knows I am having my Jesus date when the Do Not Disturb sign is out.

When our date is finished, I repack my date bag and put it back in the same spot every time by the patio door so it is ready for tomorrow’s big date. If the weather is not good, Jesus and I curl up together on the couch, and I play soft instrumental worship music in the background.

[Tweet “To keep romance exciting, it’s good to vary the activities on dates”]

To keep romance exciting, it’s good to vary the activities on dates, so I constantly add freshness to my Quiet Time with variety. Each Christmas, I pick out a new devotional for the coming year. I select one with an area for journaling love letters to the Lord. I start my Quiet Time date by praying the armor of God from Ephesians 6:10-18 and would never think of going into my day without this spiritual protection. I alternate working on my small group Bible studies or one I am doing for fun. Some years I read completely through the Bible, and other times, I leisurely enjoy the Scriptures.

[Tweet “I sit back close my eyes and linger in conversational prayer, letting my First Love talk to me.”]

At the end of our date, I sit back close my eyes and linger in conversational prayer, letting my First Love talk to me. He always whispers words of love and endearment as He reveals His plans, visions, and goals for us. Often, there are answers to prayers and questions, and many times, we just share a sweet silence. Like any wonderful date, I hate for it to end, but I know my First Love will be waiting eagerly for our special date tomorrow.

Idaho Quiet Times

Now that we live in Idaho with its four seasons, my Quiet Time locations change with the season: when the weather is nice, I’m out on the deck and when it’s snowing or cold I have a quiet time area right outside my office with a beautiful view out the window. I still have my Quiet Time bag packed and ready to go depending on where I’m having my date with Jesus. It’s my most favorite part of the day!

View from deck quiet times.

Indoors Quiet Time

Indoor Quiet Time View

[Tweet “Tell me about your dates with Jesus. “]

How about you? Tell me about your dates with Jesus. Leave a comment below, or if you receive my blogs by email click and leave a comment.

Happy Valentine’s Day! Here is a poem I wrote about my California Prayer Garden. Enjoy!

OUR PRAYER GARDEN

You wanted to meet me early in the morning

          In a place that was special to just you and me.

My heart was willing, and I had such a yearning

          To talk and be in your presence daily.

I began to arise just after the sun came up,

          And searched for a place where we could meet.

It had to be quiet where no one would interrupt,

          For the time that we shared would be so sweet.

I moved from room to room,

          As I tried to find the aura,

For you and me to just commune

          Every day at the same hour.

As we began to spend our time,

          I felt you nudging as I would pray:

“Our get-togethers need fresh air and sunshine.

          Let’s be amongst the beauty of the day.”

Of course, it was there all along.

          The table, the patio, the view–

I had all the makings for a Prayer Garden,

          But flowers were sadly very few.

A “green thumb” I have never been,

          But I knew this was the spot for us.

And it would not be a Prayer Garden,

          Without the ferns, oleanders and hibiscus.

A shopping trip to the nursery was fun,

          Even though I didn’t know what to buy.

Some flowers wanted shade and others liked sun,

          So I just bought what caught my eye.

Soon my garden was worthy of comment.

          The flower beds were colorful and in full blossom,

And the array of potted plants carpeted the cement.

          The transformation was truly awesome.

One final touch called out to me,

          Wind chimes to catch Your breath in the breeze.

A hummingbird feeder for quiet company,

          In the place where we will meet when ‘er You please.

Jesus, I know now why you sought a garden

          When you went to pray alone that night.

Amongst Your creation God’s presence is sovereign,

          You just know God’s plans will turn out right.

Janet Thompson 7/17/96

February 9, 2015

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Writing Meaningful Fiction

Legitimate Lies by Julie B. Cosgrove

To date, all of my books are non-fiction, but I have been studying how to write fiction for years. Someday, I’m sure God will give me a story to tell, but it hasn’t happened yet! I know that many of you have considered writing fiction so I asked author Julie B. Cosgrove to share with us some tips on how she writes fiction. Her latest book Legitimate Lies, released January 14.

[Tweet “every writer, especially a Christian one, should create with a message in mind.”]

I think a writer, especially a Christian one, should create with a message in mind. This is true for fiction as well as non-fiction. It is not enough to just tell a story, though everyone loves a good tale. But there should be a moral element to it. What can the reader learn while journeying with the character? What trials and triumphs occur, and what are their outcomes? Does good succeed over evil? Does the guy get the girl because he is sincerely loves and honors her?

[Tweet “POV (point of view or main) character should have triumph over a moral struggle “]

Above all else, my POV (point of view or main) character should have triumph over a moral struggle and come out stronger in his or her faith because of it. God’s redemptive love should halo the outcome. And hopefully, this character’s journey will also influence positively others, including the reader. I want my readers to pump their fists and whisper, “Yes!” at the end, even if they are twirling a facial tissue between their fingers as well.

But, I also want two more things from my readers—and these are my main goals. First, I want them to experience my character’s life as closely as if they were sitting on his or her shoulder. Mary DeMuth, a rather famous Christian author, once gave out toy telescopes in a workshop and told us what we, as authors, see through it is all our readers should see as well. This technique adds suspense and gives the reader personal ownership in the character. It keeps the action real and at ground level. No omnipotent observer tantalizes the reader with, “But if only she knew what lay around the corner.”

As a result, I strive to not reveal too much, even though I hope the reader may wonder from time to time, “Oh no, she didn’t just do that, did she? Didn’t she see that coming?” I use a good deal of sensory perceptions and body language in my writing so the reader can visualize the scenes as if they were watching them on their TV or computer. In fact, several people who have read my novels claim that is exactly what their experience felt like.

As a freelance writer, I once landed an eighteen-month contract writing articles for a travel website. Solely by internet surfing, I had to recreate places of interest from the view points of parents, business people and pet owners. Doing that gave me valuable insight into scene description. I hope my readers taste, feel, hear and see what is going on along with my characters.

Secondly, I want readers to become aware of a current social issue and how tenacious faith can bring about a positive result. However, I strive to make the plots and characters’ reactions realistic, accurate and meaningful. Therefore, I put in a lot of research and interview numerous professionals who deal with these dilemmas every day.

[Tweet “Through my keyboard I can mentor other women”]

I hope that, through my keyboard, I can mentor to other women (and men) about the numerous ways God is present in all circumstances to guide, comfort and correct us. Love does triumph, and evil can be defeated. There are no lengthy sermons, or paragraphs of Scriptural interpretations in my novels that may take the reader out of the scene. Instead, through dialog, self-thought, and action, I want each reader, after traveling vicariously with my characters, to be encouraged to seek a deeper relationship with our Lord and Savior as well as find the courage to tackle his or her own earthly battles when they arise.

My Books

In my first novel, Focused, I wrote about an empty-nest couple who realize their marriage is salvageable, even though both had slipped into humdrum patterns, there’s still a love-spark to fan into a flame again. When I read how many marriages end in divorce after the death of a parent or the child leaving home, I wanted to address this through the eyes of both husband and wife in a heartfelt yet light-hearted manner.

In Hush in the Storm, the horrors of human trafficking and what the average American woman can and should never do to thwart it, is an underlying theme. This evil invades every city and small town in our nation and throughout the world. But, there are positive, productive things each of us can do about it. The primary theme of the book is a grieving young widow finding the strength to move on and love again.

In my new release for 2015, Legitimate Lies, recovery from the guilt of wrong decisions and out-of-marriage sex is touched upon. When we harbor guilt, it can block us from fully experiencing God’s love for us, and love from others. The “What if they find out?” question is always there. Many people live with lies— the proverbial skeletons in their closets. In this novel, just about every character has them, which keep the reader guessing.

Yet in all three, the main character is the primary focus—her life, her struggles and her discovering that God is right there with her all along. And yes, there is a romance to sweeten the plot in each of my novels, plus sprinklings of suspense to keep you flipping the pages.

A novella, Navy Blues, which launches in July 2015, speaks to love being other-person-orientated despite our society’s self-centered, “I have a right” attitude in today’s world.

Another novel, Freed to Forgive, which will premiere in October 2015, deals with how an unforgiving spirit, no matter how heinous the act against us, can poison our outlook on life and block us from fully embracing God’s redemptive love.

To preview any of my books, fiction or non-fiction, you may go to www.juliebcosgrove.com . All in e-tablet and paperback formats through major retailers such as Amazon. I would appreciate you following my inspirational blog, Where Did You Find God Today? , and liking me on Facebook. Thanks.

Janet’s note:

Julie makes this statement and I would like to know your opinion as a reader of Christian fiction: As a Christian author, I believe I have a standard to set, although even amongst this tightly controlled community there are differing opinions. Should there be any sex at all, even if the scene tactfully fades to black? Can the characters share a glass of wine? Are any “mild cuss words” allowed if it fits the character’s personality?

What are your thoughts on Julie’s question? Please leave a comment:

If you’re reading this blog online, click on the “leave a comment” silver circle on the right at the end of this blog and a comment box will appear for you to leave your comment.

If you have received this blog via email, click here to the online blog post. Scroll to the end of the post to the “leave a comment” silver circle on the right and a comment box appears for you to leave your comment.

Look for an interview with Julie B. Cosgrove in February’s About His Work Newsletter and a chance to win a copy of her new book, Legitimate Lies.

Julie B Cosgrove is a professional speaker, workshop leader, freelance writer and multi-published author. She has penned several Bible studies, inspirational books, and faith-based romantic suspense novels, and writes regularly for numerous Christian websites and publications. She is a member of Advanced Speakers and Writers, American Christian Fiction Writers, North Texas Christian Writers, and has achieved the highest goal in Toastmasters in public speaking, the Advanced Communicator Gold. She is widowed and lives in Fort Worth, TX with two cats.

February 2, 2015

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Love Your Body with a Healthy Happy Heart

Love Your Body Like God Loves It

Today is Love Your Body Monday, the last Monday of the month. This weekend ushers in February so I want to share with you a post about heart health since February is National Heart Disease Awareness Month.

[Tweet “Heart disease is the leading cause of death for women.”]

You may be unaware that heart disease, not cancer, is the leading cause of death for women. Many of you know that I am a three-time breast cancer survivor, and I’m happy to say that I do have a very healthy heart, which I attribute to healthy eating and exercise. But my dear friend Grace Marestaing, who mentored me through breast cancer and to whom I dedicate my book Dear God, They Say It’s Cancer: A Companion Guide to Women on the Breast Cancer Journey, died in her sleep from Congestive Heart Failure (CHF) after surviving a double mastectomy and chemotherapy. Grace had no idea she had CHF.

[Tweet “Pamela Christian is a woman who miraculously survived sudden cardiac arrest “]

Pamela Christian was only in her 40’s when she miraculously survived sudden cardiac arrest and now devotes her life to increasing awareness to save physical and spiritual lives.

Pamela was working in ministry for over ten years when she literally died before defibrillation revived her. When she speaks about heart disease, Pamela asks her audiences, “What do faith and life insurance have in common?” Then she explains, “Both need to be fully in place before there’s a crisis.” From her own experience, she works to help people grasp the fragility of human life and the reality of life hereafter.

Pamela answers some questions about her near-death experience:

Pamela, you’ve been in ministry for over 20 years, but something happened in your life that greatly intensified your ministry work, tell us about that.

Yes, that “something” was a sudden cardiac arrest. I got up like any other morning, only that day I had the chance to play tennis with three women I’d not played with before. I thought the symptoms were simply a bad case of nerves. However, over the course of about twenty minutes, as my symptoms worsened, it became apparent it was much more than nerves.

You actually died. If it weren’t for the quick response to the 9-1-1- call and the Emergency Medical Professionals who witnessed your sudden cardiac arrest progression, ultimately defibrillating you, you wouldn’t be here today.

[Tweet “I was flat-lined for about one full minute”]

That’s exactly right. They documented that my heart completely stopped. I was flat-lined for about one full minute or more and during that time, my soul and spirit entered a different dimension, one that I can’t possibly describe because there are no human words to express the glorious, euphoric dimension. I can only refer to it as the threshold of heaven. I knew I was in the center of God’s sovereign care. I had no sense of any external limits, just that I was in the very center.

There was a white light off in the distance, but it didn’t beckon me. It was incredibly peaceful—again no adequate words to describe the feeling. I was aware that I was a wife and mother and not on earth or with my family, but I knew they were also in God’s sovereign care. So when the paramedics zapped me with the defibrillators, and I could sense being drawn back to my body, I felt agitated that anyone would disturb me. I didn’t want to leave that experience.

You’ve since expanded your ministry to include a heart-disease awareness effort. I love the name “Bless Your Heart.” Tell us a little more about that.

After my experience, I set out to learn more about cardiovascular disease and I learned that it, not cancer, is the leading cause of death for women. Next month is February, national heart-disease awareness month, so I’m grateful for this opportunity to share. Bless Your Heart is an awareness campaign with the slogan, “Helping Women Everywhere, Become Aware,” because with awareness we can save lives. I had no clue that my mild symptoms were the onset of sudden cardiac arrest. For most women, the symptoms are so mild that we dismiss them.

People need to know too, that sudden cardiac arrest is very different from a heart attack. Until recently, sudden cardiac arrest was sudden cardiac death—no one survived. Now with the increased accessibility of defibrillators, about 5% of witnessed victims who receive defibrillation survive.

You’ve written a power-packed E-book entitled Bless Your Heart, Your Health and Your Life – A Lifestyle Plan that Puts You in Charge. Briefly tell us about it.

Learning that proper information, diet, and exercise, can prevent many deaths from cardiovascular disease, I had to make the information available. I’m happy to offer a PDF version of my booklet to one of your readers today. It’s available on Kindle and through my website store.

With your near-death experience, most people would slow down, but you’ve increased your ministry work. Why is that?

[Tweet “When the day comes that we die, our soul and spirit will live on somewhere else.”]

I know that God created humans with a temporal body, eternal soul, and spirit. When the day comes that we die, our soul and spirit will live on somewhere else. I’ve studied the major world religions and New Age, and I’m confident that the Bible and the Christian faith provide the only reasonable explanation for our existence. Sadly, Christian faith in America is on a steady decline as people succumb to the lie that truth is relative and all roads lead to the same God and heaven.

[Tweet “Having tasted the reality of heaven, I must spend my time helping others discover the only legitimate Truth”]

Having tasted the reality of heaven, I must spend my time helping others discover the only legitimate Truth—only belief in Jesus Christ leads to heaven. That’s why I wrote my first two books in my Faith to Live By book series, Examine Your Faith! Finding Truth in a World of Lies endorsed by Josh McDowell, and released late 2014, and Renew Your Hope! Remedy for Personal Breakthroughs, endorsed by Dr. Charles H. Kraft and others.

The reviews have been exceedingly gratifying. It’s available at all major retailers and on my web site pamelachristianministries.com. My desire is to help many more people discover and live in life-giving truth and it’s eternal hope.

No one wants to live his or her life based on a lie. But, unless we intentionally examine what we believe and why we believe it, we could very easily be deceived and not know it. Unless our hope is firmly rooted in truth, we are without hope.

Since the human soul and spirit are eternal, and what we believe in this life determines our destiny, shouldn’t the single most important quest in life be discovering the Truth?

Thank you Pam for all you do and for sharing your heart with us today.

Warning Signs of Cardiovascular Disease

All women need to be aware of the warning signs of cardiovascular disease and learn how to help save lives. Visit Pamela’s Bless Your Heart Campaign website.

Pamela’s print books are available at all major retailers.

You can hear her amazing story at blessyourheartcampaign.com.

Win a Free Book

Pamela is offering a free PDF version of her booklet Bless Your Heart, Your Health and Your Life – A Lifestyle Plan that Puts You in Charge to one of you!

If you’re reading this blog online, click on the “leave a comment” silver circle on the right at the end of this blog and a comment box will appear for you to leave your comment.

For over twenty years, Pamela Christian has been helping people in matters of faith. Ministry for Pam began as Teaching Director for Community Bible study, followed by speaking at retreats and conferences where invited, coast to coast. Expanding her ministry included hosting live Christian talk-radio in two major markets and work in commercial television. With a certificate in apologetics from Biola University, membership with the International Society of Women in Apologetics and Christian Women in Media, all of Pam’s work is to compassionately help people discover and live in the same life-giving truth that she has been blessed to find. Her fervent interests are faith, family, friends and food, so it is not unusual to find her dotingly planning gatherings and cooking to bring all her passions together. She and her husband live in Orange County, CA, with their two grown children and families living nearby.

January 26, 2015

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How To Survive Feeling Overwhelmed

It’s only the third week of the New Year, but maybe you’re like me and feeling a little overwhelmed with all you let go during the holidays. Some of you may still have your Christmas decorations up–we have our outside lights up still because I love them so much, and we’re still eating off of our snowman Christmas dishes. Those things don’t bother me, but a looming book deadline and preparing for speaking at a retreat in Nebraska at the end of this month, along with family and ministry obligations, now that can give me a few over-the-edge moments. So I was delighted when Dianne Barker offered to give us all a few tips on surviving what she calls, “Overwhelm City.”

Also, if you’re receiving this blog via email and would like to leave a comment on the website blog, just click here and it will take you to the online blog post. Then scroll down to the bottom of the post and you’ll see a silver circle on the right that says “leave a comment”. Click on the circle and a comment box will appear for you to write your comment.

If you’re reading this blog at the website, scroll down to the bottom of the post, click on the silver circle on the right that says “leave a comment” and the comment box will appear.

Dianne and I would both like to hear how you survive Overwhelm City.

Survival Kit for Overwhelm City

By Dianne Barker

Yikes! Where am I? Did I misread the map? Overlook the road sign? Experience total GPS failure?

Oh, now I recognize the neighborhood. I’ve spent time here before—Overwhelm City—the home of over-commitment and complicated circumstances.

The only fix for over-commitment is saying “no.” A hard choice—but a choice.

[Tweet “The only fix for over-commitment is saying “no.””]

There’s no easy fix for beyond-our-control, complicated circumstances: crumbling marriages, prodigal children, career adjustments, financial difficulties, relationship issues, care-giving responsibilities, health concerns, assorted calamities, grief, terrorism, and fear. . . just to name a few.

[Tweet “I’ve begun to feel at home in Overwhelm City among the desperate who are crying”]

I’ve begun to feel at home in Overwhelm City among the desperate who are crying,

“Save me, O God! For the waters have come up to my neck…the flood sweeps over me” (Psalm 69:1-2 ESV).

Although my husband and I have been caring for people we love during our forty-nine year marriage—several relatives and even a few friends who were close as family—I wasn’t prepared for an extended stay in Overwhelm City.

After leaving a successful journalism career to be a stay-at-home mom, I continued writing. My 1986 book Twice Pardoned was a number-one national Christian best-seller. The ink had barely dried when God led me from my public life as an author and speaker to a secluded life—caring for our parents as their health declined. I spent the next fifteen years in Overwhelm City, struggling to keep my head above water.

Doing the “gottas”

Routine housework wasn’t at the bottom of the list…it didn’t make the list. I did the gottas: wash dishes, make beds, clean bathrooms. My priorities were driving our parents to medical appointments, grocery shopping, cooking, and doing laundry for our three families. One week I made three trips to the coin laundry, due to plumbing problems at home, and washed a total thirty-two loads. Attending school functions involving our children and attending church completed my schedule.

Unexpected Ministry

Gradually, God eliminated every non-essential activity, shrinking my life to basics. My “shrunken life,” though limited in scope, was still significant. That season provided an opportunity to return to our parents some of the loving devotion they had showered on us. It was a fruitful time of growing closer to the Lord, immersing in His Word, and learning to depend on Him for every step and breath.

During this time, He gave me an unexpected ministry—mentoring young women He sent to my door seeking marriage and parenting advice. I shared principles the Lord was teaching me and promises I’d memorized from Scripture. As the women continued coming, I created a makeshift memorization booklet, which I later published: Walking in Victory—a Two-Year Scripture Memorization Plan. Fruit in the desert!

An Amazing Gift

During that complicated period, the Lord also gave me an amazing gift:

Peace that I was where He wanted me.
Purpose, doing what He designed.
Promise that someday He would expand my life again.

God always keeps His promises, and He never wastes an experience. He’s begun expanding my life. Besides providing opportunities to speak and publish, He surprised me with a weekly program on the Christian radio station WHCB, Bristol, Tennessee.

[Tweet “A life submersed in Christ is a better term for my “shrunken life.””]

A life submersed in Christ is a better term for my “shrunken life.” When my journey detours to Overwhelm City, I can be sure He has a purpose.

[Tweet “Survival kit for Overwhelm City”]

Survival Kit for Overwhelm City

If this fresh New Year finds you at the outskirts of Overwhelm City, a few tools from my Survival Kit will help you make the most of the experience and sweeten the stay.

Simplify life. Eliminate non-essentials. “He has told you. O man, what is good; and what does the Lord require of you but to do justice, and to love kindness, and to walk humbly with your God?” (Micah 6:8).
Draw near to Jesus. He said, “Come to me, all who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest” (Matthew 11:28).
Accept that you are here by God’s design. “But he knows the way that I take; when he has tried me, I shall come out as gold” (Job 23:10).
Believe God has a purpose. We don’t have to see it to believe it. If nothing else, He’s developing endurance. “For you have need of endurance, so that when you have done the will of God you may receive what is promised” (Hebrews 10:36).
Keep a teachable heart. Ask: Lord, what do you want me to learn? “I will instruct you and teach you in the way you should go; I will counsel you with my eye upon you” (Psalm 32:8).
Encourage yourself with truth. “Ah, Lord God! It is you who have made the heavens and the earth by your great power and by your outstretched arm! Nothing is too hard for you” (Jeremiah 32:17).
Rejoice. If I rejoice today, I rejoice in these circumstances. “Rejoice always, pray without ceasing, give thanks in all circumstances…” (1 Thessalonians 5:16-18).

[Tweet “Overwhelm City is a sweet community of broken people.”]

Overwhelm City is a sweet community of broken people. Didn’t I just see you moving in next door? Come on over. I can’t wait to hear your story!

Dianne Barker is a conference speaker, freelance journalist, radio host, and author. This post is adapted from I Don’t Chase the Garbage Truck Down the Street in My Bathrobe Anymore! Organizing for the Maximum Life, which won the Christian Authors Network Golden Scrolls 2014 third-place award for non-fiction book of the year (available at LifeWay Christian Stores, www.crossbooks.com, www.amazon.com, www.barnesandnoble.com, www.diannebarker.com.)

January 19, 2015

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Helping Hurting Women

By Laura Petherbridge

We Can’t Stop Now

The Church Typically Doesn’t Understand

God Has Other Plans

What Can YOU Do?

Let Them Cry

By Joanne Kraft

Here’s a few things I learned to do when my toddlers or teenagers were hurt or sad.

Connecting the Easter Bunny to the True Meaning of Easter

By Linda Rooks

The Significance of the Moon

A Story of Faith, Compassion, and Courage

Women Need Each Other (Plus a Give-Away)

by Lori Wildenberg

Leave a Comment for a Chance to Win a Free Book

A Pure Mind is a Healthy Mind

Satan Wants You to Have a Sick Mind

What’s A Christian to Do?

Satan is Working Hard and Fast

Which Mother and Wife Won’t See 50 Shades of Grey?

Breaking Free From Parenting Out of Fear

by Kathy Helgemo

When are you parenting out of fear?

How can you break free and parent more from love?

What’s one area you can turn over your fear to God letting Him take control?

Leave a comment for a chance to win a copy of Mothering From Scratch.

If you are receiving this blog by email, click here to leave a comment.

Be My Valentine!

My First Prayer Garden

My Date Bag with Jesus is always Packed

Idaho Quiet Times

How about you? Tell me about your dates with Jesus. Leave a comment below, or if you receive my blogs by email click and leave a comment.

Happy Valentine’s Day! Here is a poem I wrote about my California Prayer Garden. Enjoy!

OUR PRAYER GARDEN

My Books

Janet’s note:

Pamela answers some questions about her near-death experience:

Warning Signs of Cardiovascular Disease

Win a Free Book

Survival Kit for Overwhelm City

By Dianne Barker

Doing the “gottas”

Unexpected Ministry

An Amazing Gift

Survival Kit for Overwhelm City

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