Never Stop Praying for Your Prodigal!

Many of you have read my book Praying for Your Prodigal Daughter: Hope, Help & Encouragement for Hurting Parents, in which praying mother, Chris Adams, shares the story of praying for her prodigal daughter Alycia. While I was writing the last chapter of the book, Alycia reunited with her family and I was able to include an excerpt from Chris’ journal of their reunion. God’s timing was, as always, perfect. I wrote in the final chapter:

Chris Adams shared and wrote about her story in this book when she had no idea if her prodigal daughter was dead or alive. But just today—this very day—as I conclude this final chapter—there’s another chapter in her story of God’s amazing grace. .

Today, Alycia boldly shares her testimony with you, my blog followers. I’m so proud to introduce to you returning prodigal, Alicia Neighbors!

Prodigal drawing

I Ran From My Family and God

I started running away from my family and God when I was in my early teens. I ran because I sought acceptance, approval and an excitement I didn’t believe I had within my home. I ran because I wanted to be my own boss of my destiny and thought I could find my purpose on my own with no help from my earthly family or from a God I couldn’t see or hear.

My answer to any inward or outward conflict was flight.

My parents made the difficult decision to place me in a group home. I thought they just didn’t want me around, and for a while, played the game of the rules that were set up. Then the urge came from nowhere to run again. It wasn’t a suggestion of my mind, but a desire of my heart. Just to prove in this controlled environment that I didn’t need anyone and could once again design my life with no help from anyone else.

I Ran Into an Abusive Relationship

Years later, I found myself in a marriage full of domestic abuse that would not allow me to run. Oh, I tried to run a few times, but he made sure that I regretted it and even threatened my life if I tried it again. Before the marriage, I had a son by another man. After a few beatings from my husband and seeing his anger directed towards my son, I signed away my parental rights to my son’s natural father and took my husband’s suggestion to disappear from everyone.

For eight years, there was no contact with anyone. Often during those times, I had a strong pull to contact my parents, but I wasn’t allowed a phone or alone time away from the house. I was trapped and I began to pray that somehow a way would be made. No easy option presented itself, so I realized I was going to have to make something happen. I emailed my aunt and asked her if restoration was even possible. She encouraged me that my parents loved me deeply and I needed to heal what was broken.

A Praying Mother’s Prayers

In my mother’s prayer journal, she had written:

“After not seeing our daughter Alycia for over 8 years, and hot hearing from her in 3-4 years, I was compelled for the last couple of months to pray that God would just let us know if Alycia was alive. During the last month, Amanda, [her twin sister] unknowing of my prayers, was also searching once again for her on the Internet. She finally came across her name on an email on petfinders.com. It was a response thanking someone for returning her missing dog.

Amanda emailed me the string of emails with this information. That continued to stir my heart and prayers for Alycia. “Sleuth” Amanda, began trying to find the lady who had found the dog, and when she did, she discovered it had taken place a couple of years ago. But as Amanda continued to search, she came across a “last known” address. On Wednesday, November 1, Amanda drove to the address and knocked on the door. No one answered so she left a note saying, “If Alycia lives here, please call and just give us a phone number so we could let her know if someone in our family died.”

I stole my husband’s cell phone while he was sleeping and called my mom. We exchanged some pictures online of her one-year-old granddaughter she had not met and made plans to meet. At this same time, my twin sister had felt the pull to track me down and found the house I had just moved from. We missed each other by about two weeks. My husband was not pleased about my sneaking, but I cracked the door open and even he knew that to prevent me from going wasn’t going to end it. He did send me to the reunion meeting with a broken nose and two black eyes, but I made contact finally.

I Ran Back Into The Welcoming Arms of God and My Parents

Alycia and parentsAlicia and her parents Chris and Pat Adams

The restoration of the prodigal child and parent relationship can take time because of the trust issues formed during flight mode and absences; but it’s not beyond our God’s ability to heal. I would imagine if we sat down with a calendar, every time I felt a “pull” to go home was also the same time that my parents and others were in intense prayer for me.

In my mother’s journal about the experience, she said this

“Alycia knew nothing about my prayers or Amanda’s searching, which is why this had to be the work of the Holy Spirit nudging each of us toward one another.”

Now many years later, my parents and I have a good relationship. My marriage to the abusive man ended through widowhood, and I’m now married to a wonderful man and gained four bonus sons in addition to my three girls. My faith and love in my Heavenly Father has been restored as I allowed Him to finally bless me the way He had always wanted to. I allow His will to dictate my life and no longer feel the need to make my own way. His plan and purpose is so much better.

I have stopped running because everything I ran to—love, acceptance, family, and purpose—had been there all along. It just took my prayers and the prayers of my parents and many others to help me see this.

What do I want you to take away from all this?

1.)   Never stop praying or give up hope on your prodigal. It may be weeks, months or years, but your prayers are essential for your prodigal to feel the “pull” home.

2.)   If you still have limited contact with your prodigal, don’t let them see your bitterness or anger at their actions. Mimic God’s love and acceptance. You can verbalize you don’t like what they are doing, but you will always love them.

3.)   Your prodigal may have found themselves in a situation that does not allow them to come home or make contact. Form large prayer groups to fully cover your prodigal. More prayers, more “pull.”

 

Thank you Alycia! Her last three points, I also cover in Praying for Your Prodigal Daughter: Hope, Help & Encouragement for Hurting Parents, along with the promise that God will always give you all a testimony to share.There are discussion questions at the end of each chapter for family and support groups. My husband and I hold a support group for parents and grandparents of prodigals to give them a safe place to unite in praying for their prodigals. If you have a prodigal, please consider forming such a group.

I have support on my website to help you get started. By the way, the principles in this book apply to both daughters and sons.

Never stop praying.1 Thessalonians 5:17

 

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God Given Dreams Do Come True

I hope you all had a blessed Mother’s Day honoring your moms and being honored if you are a mom. This week, I want to introduce to you my friend Stephanie Shott who has a heart for moms and a burden for moms mentoring other moms, one mom at a time. Stephanie is the founder of The M.O.M Initiative where I am honored to be a mentor mom!

As you will read here, Stephanie and I are kindred spirits and share the same passion for women mentoring women according to Titus 2:3-5.

Please welcome Stephanie Shott—

 TheMakingofaMomsmall

A God Dream

Has God placed a dream in your heart but you feel like you’re in God’s waiting room? Wondering if your dream will ever come true? Like the Lord isn’t working fast enough and then suddenly everything begins to fall in place?

That has been my story for the past four years; but the tide has turned and I feel like a fly on the wall of my life as I watch the Lord put together the pieces of the ministry puzzle for The M.O.M. Initiative.  TMI LOGO ~ SMALL

The ministry has been in place for two years and the final piece of the puzzle is coming out in July—The Making of a Mom(available for pre-order)—the premier book to work in tandem with The M.O.M. Initiative.

It’s written for moms and also serves as a resource for the church.

A Book for Every Mom

If you’re a mom, I wrote The Making of a Mom to meet you in the messy places of real life motherhood—to lay a biblical foundation for motherhood and to help you embrace the truth that you are deeply treasured by God…that He sees you and He LOVES you. You weren’t meant to make this journey alone.

The Making of a Mom answers the deep questions of a mom’s heart. “Am I enough?” “Will I ever get it right?” “How can I not mess up my kids when I’m such a mess?”

A Resource for Churches

Uniquely written as an in-reach and an outreach resource, The Making of a Mom includes questions at the end of each chapter and planning guides in the back.

The Making of a Mom answers the three questions almost every mentor, ministry leader, and small group leader asks…

1. What will I say?

The questions at the end of each chapter serve as a catalyst for conversation.

2. What will I do?

The venue-specific planning guides in the back of the book provide the tools to mentor moms in your church, your home, and in your community.

3. What will I use?

The Making of a Mom is a dual-purpose book to reach moms who don’t know Christ and minister to the ones who already know Him.

An Invitation to be ONE in a MILLION!

Are you a mom who would like a mentor? Are you a ministry leader who is looking to begin a mentor ministry to moms? Have you been trying to figure out how you can reach your community for Christ? Would you consider the power of missional mentoring?

The ultimate goal of The M.O.M. Initiative is to impact 1,000,000 moms for Christ through the power of missional mentoring. It really is possible! If three moms in half the churches in the United States mentor three other mothers, over 1,000,000 moms and 2,500,000 children will learn how to live Christ-centered lives.

Exciting to think about, isn’t it?

I’m asking women’s ministry leaders to join me in August as we launch M.O.M. Groups and begin reaching moms through the power of mentoring.

I’m asking every mom to tell your women’s ministry leaders about The M.O.M. Groups and join one yourself.

I’m asking YOU to JOIN ME to REACH MOMS for CHRIST in YOUR COMMUNITY!

To connect with The M.O.M. Initiative to reach moms for Christ in your community, please click this link to find out more about how you can help us reach ONE MILLION MOMS for Christ.

We’re Better Together

Oh…and I can’t forget to tell you about BETTER TOGETHER! The Lord not only put the pieces of the ministry puzzle together, but also He did exceedingly, abundantly above all I could ask or think when He connected the dots for our first conference. (He’s really good at exceedingly, abundantly, isn’t He?! 🙂 )

We’re extremely blessed because Janet Thompson is one of the keynotes and she will also be sharing 4 workshops…so you won’t want to miss it!

BETTER TOGETHER is a conference in Jacksonville, Florida, July 31st – August 2nd, where 20 speakers are converging together to share 45 workshops for women of ALL ages and ALL stages of life! It’s a weekend of fun, fellowship, giveaways, and sound biblical teaching you can depend on!

Come be refreshed, refueled, encouraged, and equipped.

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If the Lord has tucked a dream in your heart, I want to encourage you to keep on keepin’ on for Jesus. Don’t give up and don’t give in. He who has called you to it will see you through it.

So, don’t lose heart. The Lord sees your hard work and He who began a good work in you will complete it. Dreams do come true…in His time.

April 2014 import 245

Stephanie Shott and me at our first TMI Mentor Mom Retreat

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Adoption According to God’s Plan

Mother’s Day is next weekend—a joyous day for mothers with children and a torturous heartbreaking day for “mommies-in-waiting.” In Dear God, Why Can’t I Have a Baby?, my daughter Kim vulnerably shares the pain of being childless on Mother’s Day and then the amazing blessing of becoming an adoptive mommy to my precious grandson, Brandon.

Our guest blogger today is my dear friend and fellow The M.O.M. Initiative mentor mom, Lori Wildenberg. Lori and her husband, like my daughter and her husband and so many couples who share their story in Dear God, Why Can’t I Have a Baby?—had their plan of how they would become a family. In every case, the couple found peace in surrendering to God’s plan.

Lori and Tom’s Story

Our Plan

As newlyweds, my husband and I had a vision—we discussed and agreed:

• Four kids. Check.
• Three through birth. Check.
• The fourth through adoption. Check.

We had a lot of love to share. We would have three kids and complete our family with an adopted child. We would be great parents so we could provide a nice home for a child that needed one.

This was a good, solid, even honorable plan. Clearly, God would bless this and be on board with our plan.

Yes, adopt a fourth child. Perfect.

Why Isn’t Our Plan Working?

We (by we, I mean me) became consumed with the goal of conceiving. I was hooked on doctor visits; placing all my hope in the medical field. Nothing was going to stop me from achieving my goal.

Every month, for thirty-six months, I vacillated between determined and disappointed. Hopeful and heartbroken.

Finally, after three years, Tom and I decided it was time to ask God about His plan for our family.

Together, we realized our hope had been misplaced.

Following God’s Plan

God sweetly directed us to stop. Stop trying. Stop the doctor visits. Stop looking to medicine. Start looking to Him. He is the One who creates families.

In His great goodness, He had already given us a heart for adoption. And…the three years of infertility had given us perspective.

Had we gone into adoption thinking we were going to do some awesome, sacrificial thing to help a child, our love might have been conditional.

What if the adopted child didn’t appreciate our sacrifice and helping hand?

In His wisdom, the Lord flipped our emotions and thoughts inside out.

We traveled to Bogota, Colombia to receive our precious bundle from God. Holding her, I knew I wanted my daughter more than she needed me.

My motivation was purely selfish.tom with courtney1

 

God did a great thing by bringing the three of us together. Then He turned our plan upside down.
• First through adoption. Check
• Three through birth. Check.
• Four kids. Check.

No medical involvement only supernatural intervention. (The only planned stork arrival was number one!)

Thankfully, His ways are not our ways.

What Not to Say to An Adopting Couple

Recently, Janet did a blog on 10 Things Not to Say or Do to Someone Experiencing Infertility. Here is my list of don’ts regarding couples who are adopting.

Don’t Say:

  • “Once you adopt, you’ll get pregnant.”
  • “What do you know about the child’s real parents?”
  • “How much did you spend?”
  • “Will you be able to love this child as much as your biological kids?”
  • Most questions fall into the none-of-your-business category. The goal of adoption isn’t to get pregnant, it’s to have a child. By the way, an adoptive parent is a real parent.

Do Say: “Congratulations. I am so happy for you.”

And as for love…love multiplies, it endures, it is forever.

Lori Wildenberg, mom of four, wife to Tom, and a licensed parent and family educator, is the co-founder of 1 Corinthians 13 Parenting. Lori is passionate about coming alongside parents to encourage, empower, and support. Her straightforward, realistic approach mixed with transparency, warmth, and gentle humor, engages her audience, and assists moms and dads in their quest to parent well. Lori has co-authored three parenting books—Raising Little Kids with Big Love and Raising Big Kids with Supernatural Love scheduled to release May 2014. To schedule Lori for one of your events go to www.loriwildenberg.com or www.1Corinthians13Parenting.com.

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Love Your Body–Buyer Beware

Love your Body“How can you afford to not eat healthy?” That’s my response when someone tells me they can’t eat healthy because of a tight budget. The financial, emotional, and painful cost to your body by not eating healthy will far outweigh (excuse the pun) any outlay for healthy eating. Learning how to substitute dollars spent on wasted calories for dollars spent on nutritious foods is the first step in eating nutritionally and staying on a food budget.

Check Your Grocery Basket

Since nutrition and healthy eating is my passion, I often glance into fellow shopper’s grocery baskets to see how they are spending their hard-earned dollars. It makes me sad when I see cases of soft drinks/beer, bags of chips, boxes of cookies, donuts, hi-sugar cereal—junk food. . . empty calories . . .wasted dollars . . . illness inducing non-essentials piled high in shopping carts. Filler not food. What comes to mind is the verse I shared last month:

Why do you spend your money on junk food, your hard-earned cash on cotton candy? Listen to me, listen well: Eat only the best, fill yourself with only the finest. Pay attention, come close now, listen carefully to my life-giving, life-nourishing words. Isaiah 55:2-5 The Message

God wants us to consider why we waste our hard-earned money on bad-for-us junk food instead of wisely allocating it to buy good-for-us healthy food! Maybe we get a few moments comfort or pleasure while eating junk food; but after the last bite, we’re often enveloped in guilt and shame for eating something we shouldn’t and wasting our money. Consumers buy many wasted calories—it’s like throwing money in the trash. Worse yet, money spent on food that actually harms your body. What sense (or dollars-and-cents sense) does that make?

Ways to Eliminate Impulse Buying

  • Set a budget for how much you can spend each week and commit to using that amount only to buy food your body needs, not wants.
  • Make a weekly grocery list of nutritious foods essential to your family’s good health that fits into you budget.
  • Commit to buying only what’s on that grocery list.

Grocery stores don’t help with this discipline or commitment. Their marketing goal is to lure and tempt you into impulse purchases that eat up your food budget on items nonessential to life.

Grocery Story Traps

Take your “nutritional needs” grocery list with you shopping. At the store, observe the following five traps awaiting you. Armed with knowledge, you’ll be a wise and prudent shopper.

Trap #1—Entrance area. Markets call this the “chill zone” and design and decorate it to help you visualize fun eating. For example, cartons of soda and bags of chips for an impromptu barbecue or beach outing.

Trap #2—Produce department. Usually near the front of the store because shopping for healthy food makes you feel less guilty indulging in unhealthy food elsewhere. Buy produce last and only buy what you need for that week. On top of the cart, it’s also safer from bruising.

Trap #3—Specials. If you would pay full price because it’s something you need on your list, buying on sale is a good deal. If not, skip it.

Trap #4—Strategic placement. Markets display impulse products such as snacks, candy, cookies, and soft drinks at ends of aisles and at checkout stands. They’re counting on catching your, or your child’s, attention.

Trap #5—Buried products. Grocers shelve popular items in the middle of an aisle so you have to pass other enticing products. Also, most processed foods are on the inner aisles. Do most of your shopping on the periphery of the store.

Trap #6—Buying multiples to get the sale price. For example “3 for $5.00.” Unless it states you must buy three to get the sale price, you can buy just one and still get the sale price, in this case $1.67.

Trap # 7—Coupons. Couponing has become very popular and some women know how to get a cart of groceries for a low price, BUT often coupons are for unhealthy foods and foods you would not normally buy. Remember last month’s blog on reading labels. Even if the store is giving it away, if the product contains ingredients you shouldn’t put in your body, or it’s not on your healthy grocery list, don’t put it in your cart.

Buyer Beware

Don’t these grocery store marketing tactics make you feel manipulated? Grocery stores are in the business of making money, and they’re not watching out for your nutritional health or your finances. If you only put in your cart what’s on your “healthy” grocery list, you can afford to eat healthy. Don’t be fooled.

In the spring and summer months, local Farmer’s Markets are a great place to buy local fruit and produce at lower prices and avoid the tempting grocery store aisles. I also buy from Bountiful Baskets Food-Co-op, which even comes to our little mountain town every two weeks. For $15.00, you get a large quantity of fruits and vegetables, and for $10.00 extra, you can get all organic. I buy the organic basket year round. Check to see if there is one in your area. Bountiful Basket OrganicMy Organic Bountiful Basket

 

Dear Father, please help me in applying all I have learned. Help me make wise choices in how I earn and spend my money. Teach me Your ways and don’t let me be fooled by worldly enticements. Help me love my body like You love my body. Amen

*Portions of this blog taken from God’s Best for Your Life. Share other grocery store traps you observe on your shopping trips.

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Hug An Infertile Couple This Week

 

Dear-God-Why-Cant-I-Have-a-Baby11-200x300

You may not have April 20-26 marked on your calendar as National Infertility Awareness Week, but 1 in 6 couples check their calendar frequently to see if they’re pregnant or how long it’s been since they filed adoption papers or when will the infertility tests be back . . .

An Ignored Group

With millions of couples experiencing infertility, a large percentage of the population feel shunned. Yet, you probably know someone dealing with infertility in your neighborhood, your church, your family, your friends, your co-workers . . .Maybe it’s you struggling to become a mommy or experiencing secondary infertility and know what it’s like to feel invisible in a group.

Many of the “mommies-in-waiting” sharing their stories in my book, Dear God, Why Can’t I Have a Baby? A Companion Guide for Couples on the Infertility Journey expressed the sorrowful complaint that they felt ignored by friends and family, even in the church–especially in the church.

Often we ignore the infertile couple because we don’t know what to say to them. Or the infertile couple doesn’t talk about their painful situation because people say hurtful things.

People Say The Darnedest Things!

Your loved ones will say all the wrong things. All of us who have gone through infertility agree on this point.—Laurie, A Mommy-in-Waiting

Dear God,

People keep asking when we’re going to start having children, as if I’m making a conscious decision not to! I try shrugging it off with an answer that we probably will “someday.” Inside, I’m dying. Why are people so insensitive and why do they feel it’s ok to ask something so personal? Everyone seems to think they’re a doctor and they know the answer to my infertility. Then the advice . . . the number one thing everyone seems to say is, “Oh, you just need to relax.” Or “You’re young; you’ve got plenty of time.” UGH!!! Help, God, they’re killing me!

Wounded by Words, Kim

Kim is my precious daughter whose struggle with the heartache of infertility was often intensified by well-meaning—yet wounding—words. Many infertile couples’ stories mention how thoughtless and hurtful people’s comments and advice can be. Debbie wrote, “I’ve experienced people in the church say some of the worst things ever to me with every good intention. Probably one of the most insensitive and painful is, ‘Maybe God never meant for you to have children.’”

You can be sure thoughtless, hurtful comments aren’t from God, who instructs: “Kind words heal and help; cutting words wound and maim” (Proverbs 15:4 MSG).

10 Things Not To Say or Do To Someone Experiencing Infertility

I believe in the front of every church directory there should be a list of things that you shouldn’t say to people during times of grief, just like emergency preparedness in the front of the phone book.—Debbie, A Mommy-in-Waiting

Most people don’t mean to be hurtful: they innately want to say and do the right thing. They offer a cliché or something that minimizes your situation or feels patronizing because they’re uncomfortable being around someone suffering. Here are ten helpful tips from Mommies-In-Waiting:

DON’T…                                                                               DO…

1. Talk about people you know with infertility.                    1. Let me talk about mine and listen

2. Tell me God is in control, or has a plan.                            2. Show me God’s love.

3. Tell me to pray harder.                                                      3. Pray for and with me.

4. Pity or patronize me.                                                          4. Show compassion.

5. Avoid me. It makes me feel rejected, different.                5. Keep normal contact with me.

6. Tell others, unless you have asked permission.                 6. Honor my privacy.

7. Offer unsolicited advice or suggestions.                            7. Support my choices.

8. Resent how my infertility affects you.                               8. Remember, this is about me.

9. Ask personal questions or give advice.                              9. Curtail curiosity.

10. Assume it’s a “female” problem.                                     10. Respect it’s personal.

Suggested Responses for the Infertile Couple

We will speak the truth in love.Ephesians 4:15 (NLT)

Following are frequent unwelcome comments and suggested responses. Non-satirical humor often defrays uncomfortable situations. Your goal isn’t to offend or embarrass the person. The responses shouldn’t be said sarcastically, defensively, or angrily. Use this as an opportunity to be a good witness:

1. “When are you two going to start a family?”

Response: What makes you think we’re not trying?

2. “You just need to relax, take it easy, rest more, or take a vacation.”

Response: Then I might have two problems—no baby and no job!

3. “You aren’t getting any younger!”

Response: Are you fishing for an invitation to my next birthday party?

4. “You’re young, you have plenty of time.”

Response: Time is the one thing we have too much of now.

5. “You should take________”—they name some food, herb, or drug.

Response: I’ll check with my doctor about that.

6. “You should try_______”—they suggest some sexual position.

Response: You mean we’re supposed to have sex?

7. “We need grandchildren.”

Response: We need to be parents first.

8. “There must be some hidden sin in your life.”

Response: Jesus forgave my sins when I became a Christian.

9. “You aren’t praying hard enough.”

Response: Are you offering to pray for us?

10. “If God wanted you to have children, you would.”

Response: Ouch! That hurts.

Remember: Words kill, words give life; they’re either poison or fruit—you choose (Proverbs 18:21 MSG).

*Some excerpts from Dear God, Why Can’t I Have a Baby? A Companion Guide for Couples on the Infertility Journey

Kim's family 2014Daughter Kim’s family today! Thank you Lord for these 3 precious blessings

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Share the Good News of Easter

Cowboy Easter Breakfast

Traditionally, Christmas and Easter are the two occasions when people who don’t normally attend church will put on their best clothes and go to church. Or maybe a neighbor or family member has invited them to attend and they feel obligated. Whatever the reason, it’s always a good thing when people hear about the birth, death, and resurrection of Jesus Christ. For some, this might be the year the gospel message resonates in their hearts and minds—they stop resisting the call to become a follower of Jesus.

Invite Someone to Church on Easter

We don’t know when or where conversions will take place so that’s why we need to continue offering everyone an opportunity to receive Christ’s invitation. Maybe your heart has become hardened by the rejection of numerous invitations to attend church with you—don’t let that happen. Don’t give up. You never know when God has planned for them to say, “Yes”!

Plan an Outreach Event

How about having an outreach Easter breakfast, or picnic or brunch or street BBQ in your neighborhood! During conversations, be open with why you celebrate Easter and what it means to you. Be prepared to answer questions.

Our church hosts a Cowboy Easter Breakfast down by the river behind our church. People in the community attend from every walk-of-life and every faith. It’s a great time of eating breakfast and drinking coffee around the campfires and there’s always a gospel message and testimonies.

Two years ago, when we had only lived here a year, I was asked to be the Cowboy Breakfast speaker. I felt humbled, hesitant, and excited. I said I would have to pray and know that God really wanted me to do this.

The awesome thing about living the Christian life is that when we pray, God answers—maybe through reading the Bible, or a sermon, or song, or even movies or TV. This time He used the big screen. We were at our kids’ church, The Pursuit in Meridian, worshipping and singing when they put Acts 20:24 on the screen:

 But my life is worth nothing to me unless I use it for finishing the work assigned me by the Lord Jesus—the work of telling others the Good News about the wonderful grace of God. Acts 20:24 (NLT)

Since my writing and speaking ministry is About His Work Ministries, I knew this was a message from the Lord assuring me that my work was to tell the Gospel story and the Good News that JESUS IS ALIVE! I also knew that there would be many unbelievers at the breakfast and God was giving me an opportunity to be a bold evangelist.

Let Your Children Participate

Encourage your children and grandchildren to invited unchurched friends to go to Sunday School with them on Easter and to come to your outreach event.

When I spoke at the Cowboy Breakfast, my then 6-year-old granddaughter Katelyn shared the microphone with me to recite John 3:16. I was so proud of her! Just this week she told me, “Grammie, I want to share John 3:16 at the Cowboy Breakfast again.” Could we be grooming the next family evangelist? Grammie-Katelyn-Cowboy-642x250

God blessed Katelyn and me with a boldness that morning to share the Gospel. Here’s what one attendee remarked:

I wanted to let you know how much I appreciated your message at the Cowboy Breakfast. It was clearly presented and probably the best explanation that I have heard so that people are not confused about making a commitment to Christ. So often people are afraid to say what is needed because they are concerned about offending their audience. It was import that you were clear on what sin is and how to make a personal commitment. I also received feedback from members of our Vineyard Home Study Group that were pleased that the truth could be so clearly spoken.Thanks again for the time and effort that you put into preparation for those who needed to hear this message.

Share Your Testimony

Last year at the Cowboy Breakfast, my husband Dave shared his testimony of turning from a self-motivated man to a man solely motivated by Christ. IMG_4102

Who needs to hear this Easter what Christ has done for you and can do for them?

Cowboy Easter Sunday Mornin’—Rod Nichols

On an Easter Sunday mornin’
‘fore the sun has yet to rise,
the roundup crew will gather ’round
to await the newborn sky.

It’s a cowboy sunrise service
neath the purple, gray and gold,
in remem’brance of a story,
that’s the greatest ever told.


Someone may say a word or two
in a simple, cowboy prayer.
Another hand may lead a hymn
for the boys still kneelin’ there.


Then the sun will climb toward heaven
from below the eastern range,
like the Lord’s ascent in glory
as it lights the darkened  plain.

When the service, then, has ended,
and the day has been reborn,
each man will know the gift of life,
on an Easter Sunday morn.

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How to Share the Easter Message with Your Children & Grandchildren

 Kathy Howard Easter 1969

Kathy Howard with her father and brother, Easter 1969

In preparation for Easter, I’m sharing this post written by my dear friend and fellow author, Kathy Howard. She has some great ideas and projects for helping our families remember the real reason for Easter, beyond the Easter baskets and brunch…

Easter Memories

Rich memories of childhood Easters keep popping up in my mind. I can still feel the cold metal of the folding chair as I sat with my family in the church parking lot waiting for the first rays of the sun to make their appearance. And with the sun, the somber notes of “low in the grave He lay…” became the joyous thunder of “up from the grave He arose (He arose), with a mighty triumph o’er His foes.” After prayer and singing, everyone escaped the chilly air and enjoyed pancakes and sausage in the church fellowship hall.

Recently, I’ve been thinking about the impact Easter had on me as a child. I also have wonderful memories of Christmas, but Easter took root in my soul from an early age. Even then, I must have sensed the eternal significance of Christ’s death and resurrection. As parents and grandparents, we have a great opportunity – and God-given responsibility – to make sure our children understand the great truth and power of Easter.

5 Ways to Celebrate a Meaningful Easter

Below are five easy, but memorable, ways to help your children understand the Easter story. Make sure you check out the links for details and more information:

1.     Make a Set of Resurrection EggsThis is a fun way to “concretely” share the Easter story with your kids. You can purchase a ready-made set, but putting them together with your kids is part of the fun. Here are the instructions for making your own Resurrection Eggs.

Resurrection Eggs

2.     Watch a Movie Together – One great way to start a conversation with your children about the Easter is by watching a movie that portrays the Easter story or illustrates its truths. Several great ones are available. Just choose one that is age-appropriate for the kids in your life. Here are a few suggestions:

3.     Attend a Good Friday Service or Event – Many churches have services on Good Friday to help us remember Christ’s sacrifice on our behalf. This is a great opportunity to talk about Jesus’ death and what it accomplished for us. Cochrane, the small town where we lived in Canada, had a “Cross Walk.” Members from all areas of the community met downtown and prayerfully followed the cross as a volunteer carried it through the streets.

 
4.     Make Resurrection CookiesUse this tasty object lesson to teach your kids about the empty tomb. Make them on Saturday night and enjoy them first thing Sunday. Here’s the recipe and how-to’s for Resurrection Cookies.

 
5.     Experience the Easter Sunrise – Like the women who went to the tomb, be up and ready to greet the first light of Sunday morning. You can do this at an official sunrise service or in your own backyard. Friday was somber. Sunday is a celebration! (And don’t forget the pancake breakfast!)

I’d love to hear about your childhood Easter memories! Also, please share ways you celebrate Easter with your kids and grandkids.

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Love Your Body–Read Labels

Love your BodyIn February, I announced that the last Monday Morning Blog of the month would be Love Your Body the Way God Loves Your Body. If you haven’t read that post, stop and read it now, or review it before reading further. In that blog, I explained that my first career was as a Registered Dietitian and it saddened me that some people pay more attention to what they put in their cars then what they put in their own precious bodies—God’s temple.

It’s Not All about Genes!

Some of you know that I’m a three-time breast cancer survivor, but otherwise, I’m extremely healthy—as is my husband. Even though both sides of my family struggled with heart disease and diabetes, my annual lab results in all areas are so pristine that my doctor said at my last physical that he could probably stop ordering the blood tests! I said no, I love to see the results of our healthy-lifestyle.

My husband’s father had quadruple bypass heart surgery and died from heart disease too early, and Dave’s mother had numerous health issues related to obesity. However, at 68 my husband’s doctor told him that he was healthier than 98% of the men he saw in his practice. Neither of us take medications, except I take thyroid for hypothyroidism—low thyroid.

I don’t tell you this to brag, but simply to point out that I often hear: “It’s hereditary; I can’t do anything about my condition, so I might as well eat what I want.” That’s a fallacy—Dave and I are healthy proof. Yes, genes do play a role, but knowing what you’re dealing with gives you a head’s up on being proactive rather than feeding into a generational cycle.

How the Thompsons Eat

I have always fed my family healthy foods, but when I was diagnosed with breast cancer, I stepped it up a notch. I believe my breast cancer and recurrences are the result of cell damage from X-rays I had during puberty when I wore a body cast for debilitating scoliosis. I had X-rays to my chest throughout puberty and they weren’t as sophisticated as today’s are. After my first breast cancer surgery and radiation in November 2002, I wanted to do everything I could to recover quickly and get back About His Work. So we converted to eating organic and raw.

I’m not obsessive about eating organic, but I buy organic and raw fruits, vegetables, nuts, and some meats. We don’t eat pork or red meat, except for lamb occasionally, but we do eat chicken, turkey, and wild fish. The only oils are organic: olive, grapeseed, and coconut.

On our Love Your Body Mondays, I’ll share more specifics, recipes, cooking ideas, and frugal shopping tips, but I’m going to start with helping you know what you put in your body.

Read Labels

I read every label; if I don’t recognize an ingredient, I don’t buy the item. I avoid soy because of my breast cancer and some soy mimics estrogen in the body. The FDA has allowed the food industry to add soy indiscriminately to much of our food. “Soy lecithin” is one of the most ubiquitous additives in our food supply. It’s used primarily as an emulsifier and you find it in everything from salad dressings to vitamins. The soy portion comes from soybean oil extracted from soybeans. You can avoid the brunt of soy lecithin by eliminating most processed foods, but read the labels.

Sadly, most labels are ambiguous. The FDA is supposedly making labels more user-friendly, but the food industry is marketing against the higher cost of making new labels, and it will be easier for us to see what’s in our food. It might take a while before we see a change, so here are some tips to get you started now:

Front of Package

1. Don’t be fooled by words like “healthy,” “all natural,” “fat free,” “wholesome”, “sugar-free.” For a detailed list read “16 Most Misleading Food Labels” (they actually give 19!).

“Natural foods” and “all natural foods” are widely used terms in food labeling and marketing with a variety of definitions, most of which are vague. The term is assumed to imply foods that are minimally processed and do not contain manufactured ingredients, but the lack of standards in most jurisdictions means that the term assures nothing. The term “organic,” however, has an established legal definition in many countries, including the United States, as well as an agreed upon international standard. Therefore all natural and organic products are not the same. In some countries, the term “natural” is defined and enforced. In others, such as the United States, it has no meaning.—From Wikipedia

2. Don’t trust “Organic” labeling unless it has a certified insignia:

certified organicorganic labelsorganic

 

If the box states “organic ingredients,” read the label to be sure all the ingredients are organic. Also all “organic” foods are not necessarily good for you—organic sugar is better than nonorganic sugar, but sugar is still sugar and just because it’s organic doesn’t give it a free pass. It still has “wasted calories” with no nutritional value.

Label on Back of Package

1. Check the serving size. Often it’s only ½ cup. Who only eats a half cup of ice cream or cereal? If you eat 2 cups, you need to multiply the nutritional breakdown, including calories, by four!

2. Listed ingredients go from highest content to lowest. So if water is the first ingredient, the product is mostly water. For example, a lemon drink that touts “made with lemon” may list lemon juice as the last ingredient. Or it could even be lemon flavoring.

3. If you don’t recognize an ingredient, don’t buy it. You don’t want to put an unknown into your body…do you? Write down the ingredient and look it up when you get home. Chances are it’s a preservative, which you want to avoid.

4. Natural food sugar isn’t listed separately from added sugar in the nutritional breakdown. Reading the ingredients shows added sugar and its position in the list of ingredients. Even if it’s organic sugar or maple syrup, it’s still sugar with no nutritional value…just calories.

Avoid anything with high glucose corn syrup. Especially check children’s snacks.

I sent my husband on a mission of finding a barbeque sauce that didn’t contain high fructose corn syrup. He read every label on the grocery store shelf, and there was only one.

5. Check the sodium level, and again, that’s per the label’s serving size.

6. Avoid everything with saturated and Trans fats.

7. Look for added soy, which could be in the form of soybean oil or soy lecithin. No one needs the amount of soy added to our food.

8. Choose wild fish, not farmed.

Buy Fresh, Be Healthy

When possible by fresh and avoid packaged, processed foods, then you don’t have to worry about labels unless you’re looking for organic. Then you do need to look for the certified organic emblem. Beware at farmer’s market, because they may tell you they don’t use pesticides, but you’re only taking their word for it.

It may take you longer to shop at first, and it’s probably not a good idea to have the kids around; but soon you’ll know what to look for and which foods to avoid. You may think that buying organic is more expensive, but when you see all the products you aren’t buying, you’ll actually reduce your food bill and increase your health.

Happy shopping! Tell me how the experience goes and what you found on labels.

Why do you spend your money on junk food, your hard-earned cash on cotton candy? Listen to me, listen well: Eat only the best, fill yourself with only the finest. Pay attention, come close now, listen carefully to my life-giving, life-nourishing words. I’m making a lasting covenant commitment with you, the same that I made with David: sure, solid, enduring love. — Isaiah 55:2-5

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Mentoring is Not an Option

This past weekend, I had the honor of sharing the Woman to Woman Mentoring Ministry with churches in Sedalia, Missouri. I’ve shared this message hundreds of times throughout the United States and Canada, and I’m as excited and passionate about encouraging and equipping women to mentor, as I was when I first heard God’s call to “feed My sheep” nineteen years ago. The passion never fades—the excitement of telling a new group of women about the blessings of following God’s instructions for mentoring never wanes.

Mentoring is The Job Description for Christians 

When churches call and ask for advice on how to encourage their women to become involved in a mentoring relationship, I say: Take your women to Titus 2:1-8 where the Lord is giving a command to all Christian men and women. He says for spiritually older men to teach the spiritually younger men, and the women to do the same.

Next, I suggest that they point out that there are no qualifiers in that passage. The verses don’t say: If you have time, or if you feel like it, or if you can fit it into your schedule, or if you aren’t doing another ministry, or if you don’t work, or if you feel comfortable with it, or if you feel qualified, or if you feel called…..

They simply say for Christians to just “DO IT”—no options!

In Titus 2:5 and 8, Paul emphasizes why it’s so important for spiritually older men and women to teach the spiritually younger: “so that no one will malign the word of God” (v 5) or “have nothing bad to say about us” (v 8). But today the culture is maligning the Word of God and bad-mouthing Christians because we’ve stopped following Gods instructions in this passage.

God wants the spiritually mature to help newer believers learn how to become godly role models reflecting how His people live and have relationships and marriages so others would seek Christ through us.

Christian living should help rather than hinder the spread of the gospel.

There’s A World of Hurt

Many young women today are struggling in their roles in marriage, as mothers, as friends, as employees, as women in the church. Where are the women who will selflessly reach out and “show them the ropes” of living a life in Christ?

I’ve heard the sad testimony of women who walked out of a crusade or revival meeting or the church service where they accepted Christ, and went right back into their old lifestyle. One woman told me she even went to a party with her worldly friends the very night she accepted Christ! She didn’t know any different. Many new believers backslide and go years with Christ in their heart but not in their head. Their stories have a common theme…

            I know I accepted Christ. I asked Him into my heart, but I didn’t know what that meant. My old familiar life and friends and unsaved family were all still there, and there was no one from this “new life” that would help me learn how to live it. It just seemed easier to go on as I had before. Only now I had a lot of confusion, guilt, and conviction in my life, which made me feel even worse than before I accepted Christ.

Haven’t you heard these stores yourself? We would never let our babies out on their own with no direction as soon as they could walk and talk. Yet, we let these new baby Christians go out the doors of our churches straight into the world, without a hand to hold to keep them safe until they’re ready to be spiritually on their own. This is tragic when there’s a wealth of maturity in the women of our churches. Women who have so much to offer from walking with Christ, and could help these younger Christian women mature in the Lord.

Sharing Life’s Experiences and God’s Faithfulness

Taking the time to reach out to a spiritually younger woman is a selfless act of giving and ministry. Not to preach, but teach. To let your life—with all the wealth of good and bad experiences—be a role model that Christ was with you through it all. There are women in your church who desperately need a woman who will honor the command given to each of us in Titus 2. Women who will teach how to: study God’s Word, be a Christian wife and mother, manage a home and family, deal with temptation or crisis . . . be a “lady of the Lord.”

  • Who is assuming responsibility to transmit biblical values to these women?
  • Who is listening to their questions and their concerns and guiding them to the Book with all the answers and the One who fulfills all our needs?

Blessings of Being a Titus 2 Woman

Many of you know the blessings of accepting this Titus 2 call and command from the Lord. When we make an investment in a spiritually younger woman, it enriches our own lives, the sense of connectedness and shepherding in our church families deepens, society benefits, and we honor God’s Word.

Jesus said:  “I tell you the truth, anyone who gives a cup of water in my name because you belong to Christ, will certainly not lose his reward” (Mark 9:41).

You can’t out-give God. As we share our lives with another sister-in-Christ, our own life and our church will receive immeasurable blessings.

If you’ve experienced the miracles and blessings of being in a Titus 2 mentoring relationship, please share your testimony with others who may have questions or may be hesitant to mentor. If you’ve been a mentor, please pray about making Titus 2:3-5 a permanent and ongoing part of your Christian walk.

If you’ve grown spiritually as a mentee, God will put someone in your life who is right where you once were and could use your encouragement and mentoring.

One generation commends your works to another;
they tell of your mighty acts.
Psalm 145:4

clip_image002_005-245x250To start a Woman to Woman Mentoring Ministry in your  church:

Woman to Woman Mentoring How To Start, Grow, and Maintain a Mentoring Ministry

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Generation Gaps Not in God’s Plan

Kim and me Mother's Day Tea

Sharing the podium with my daughter Kim as “Two About His Work”

Do you remember when you were the next generation full of hope and ideas and ready to leave your mark on the world? I do. I also remember feeling misunderstood and unappreciated when sharing thoughts and ideas with older adults. Yet 36 times in the New Living Translation of the Bible, the Lord uses the term “generation to generation.” Many more verses instruct us to pour into those who are coming up behind us in the church and in our homes. It was God’s plan for the continuation of His church throughout the generations.

A Privilege Not a Burden

Sharing with the next generation some of what God and life has taught us is truly an honor and a privilege. The blessings multiply when the next generation is teachable and eager to learn.

Throughout the Bible, God instructs one generation of believers to teach and train the next generation [see verses at the end of this blog]. Praise God, over the centuries believers have followed this mandate. Think of it: if they hadn’t, you and I would not be Christians today! We are benefactors of the sacrifices of believers who have gone before us. Over the years, followers of God and His Son, Jesus Christ, have felt compelled to assure that the next generation:

  • has access to the Bible and understands its contents
  • knows how to communicate with God through the Holy Spirit and prayer
  • receives guidance in leading a godly life

What Is Our Generation Doing?

The question our generation must ask is: What is God calling believers—you and me—to do today? How can we invest our lives in the next generation, as Elizabeth (mother of John the Baptist) did with Mary (mother of Jesus)? Each of us must answer that question in a very personal and real way. If you are:

  • A mother, you are influencing the next generation through your children.
  • A Grandmother, your grandchildren.
  • An employer, your employees.
  • A ministry worker, the benefactors of your ministry.
  • A pastor, your congregation.
  • A school teacher, your students.
  • A Sunday school teacher, the children in your classrooms every Sunday.
  • A mentor, your mentee.

Why Do We Have Generation Gaps?

There should never be a generation gap in the church—that was not God’s plan. God commanded that one generation was to pass down His truths to the next generation. In churches today, the gap between generations is often so wide that the only thing passed between the two is mistrust and misunderstanding—all in the name of Jesus.

I believe it’s often the older generation who perpetuate the gap by wanting everything to stay the same—same music, same way of doing things, same church service, same church activities . . . . Many churches relegate the young people to their own groups, and their input—whether in music or talents or ideas—is not welcome in the main sanctuary. Then they wonder why the youth are leaving the church in droves.

Church Is Not About Us

Our job as Christians is not to insist that everything goes our way. The purpose of church is not simply to spiritually feed the congregation; we’re to pass on what we learn to others. The Great Commission tells us to go out and tell the world about Jesus, and that includes the next generation.

If we want to stay relevant in the lives of the next generation, we need to learn how to embrace their style of worship . . . their way of communicating . . . their world. If we want to have an impact in their lives—to help guide them in the ways of righteousness—we need to speak their language, care about the things they care about, and reach out to them in love with a desire to understand what’s important to them.

My Call to “Feed My Sheep”

When I rededicated my life to the Lord in the summer of 1992, it marked a turning point in my life. I moved from thinking of how I could further myself in this world, to how could I further God’s kingdom. When I asked myself the question of what God was calling me to do, He clearly answered. I was to take a huge risk of leaving a well-paying career to go into full-time ministry. Not just any ministry—but a Woman to Woman Mentoring Ministry that would teach and train the next generations of believers. The rest is history, as my grandmother used to say.

What Are You Doing to Bridge the Generation Gap?

Many churches today are mentoring, embracing, and equipping the next generation—the future of the church. If you attend or serve in one of those churches, I’d love for you to share specifics of how you are fulfilling Psalm 145:4 NLT

“Let each generation tell its children of your mighty acts; let them proclaim your power.”

Here are some verses that reveal the significance of one generation passing down God’s truths to the next generation:

Elizabeth and Mary coverElizabeth and Mary coverSome excerpts of this article are from Face to Face with Elizabeth and Mary: Generation to Generation.

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