mother — Page 3 — Woman to Woman Mentoring

Who’s Behind The War on Women?

Over the years, it’s appeared outwardly that women are advancing in respect and career opportunities. Women are CEO’s, own businesses, hold political positions, host news programs, headline movies and TV programs, author books, own homes, are public speakers and the list goes on.

Until recently, we would’ve said that the culture was on the side of women achieving their goals. Or has it been?

What’s changed?

Who’s behind the devaluing of women and their safety?

Who’s behind the war on women?

I think the answer to those and even more questions originated in the Garden of Eden when the serpent, the Devil, chose to tempt Eve instead of Adam with the forbidden fruit. Sadly, she succumbed to the question so often used to justify sin today, “Did God really say?”

The serpent was the shrewdest of all the wild animals the Lord God had made. One day he asked the woman, “Did God really say you must not eat the fruit from any of the trees in the garden?” Gen. 3:1 NLT

The disgraced Satan has always been at war with God. He wants to be God and when that fails, he wants to be sure that God’s people do not multiply and fill the earth as God predestined.

Satan will try anything to stop God’s people from multiplying. Since God gave women reproductive anatomy, the Devil is the commander, plotter, originator, and perpetuator of the war on women.

Remember in Ephesians 6 that we’re told our battle isn’t against flesh and blood, aka the liberals, progressives, Democrats, atheists, imposters trying to be women. No, the battle is against the spiritual principalities of evil. Those flesh and blood people perpetuating the evil often don’t even realize that they’re being played by Satan. Used. Deceived. Weaponized as they do his dirty work.

But like Eve learned, there will be a price to pay for anyone manipulated by Satan and sadly his victims.

¹⁰A final word: Be strong in the Lord and in his mighty power. ¹¹Put on all of God’s armor so that you will be able to stand firm against all strategies of the devil. ¹²For we^[^a^] are not fighting against flesh-and-blood enemies, but against evil rulers and authorities of the unseen world, against mighty powers in this dark world, and against evil spirits in the heavenly places. Eph. 6:10-12 NLT

One of Satan’s most effective tactical weapons is the use of lies to create confusion. As with Eve, if he can create enough doubt and confusion, his evil battle rages on.

⁴³Why can’t you understand what I am saying? It’s because you can’t even hear me! ⁴⁴For you are the children of your father the devil, and you love to do the evil things he does. He was a murderer from the beginning. He has always hated the truth, because there is no truth in him. When he lies, it is consistent with his character; for he is a liar and the father of lies. ⁴⁵So when I tell the truth, you just naturally don’t believe me! John 8:43-45 NLT

Let’s look at some of Satan’s strategies in the War on Women!

The Battleground of Abortion

Many women believe the lie that they’re not carrying a baby; it’s just tissue and cells they’re told. Even with the advent of seeing the baby via sonograms, hearing the heartbeat, and knowing that each cell contains the baby’s DNA, Satan uses semantics to confuse them. It’s just “ending or terminating a pregnancy.” “A woman’s choice.” “Women’s healthcare.” “My body, my choice.” “Reproductive rights.”

Women are deceived into believing their life will be better without the life of their baby. Instead, millions of women have a hole in their heart grieving the children they didn’t allow to be born. Only Jesus can help mend that hole and He will if asked and allowed.

When House Speaker Nancy Pelosi, a mother of five and grandmother of nine, is asked about how she reconciles her Catholic faith with her undaunted support of abortion, she responds: “Let me just say that I’m a big supporter of Roe v. Wade . . . . I am a mother of five children in six years. I have some standing on this issue as to respecting a woman’s right to choose.”

I often wonder what her children think when they hear her repeated and relentless defense of abortion?

An author of an article in the Washington Examiner wrote:

“I am a mother” is really not an answer to whether abortion takes a human life. It is, in fact, a false appeal to authority. And it looks especially bad precisely because a mother, of all people, shouldn’t have a hard time answering the question.
Pelosi does have some “standing on the issue” on account of her having a large family. For her, this shouldn’t be a difficult question. But as the standard-bearer for a party with a fanatical devotion to keeping abortion legal and available through all nine months of pregnancy, she cannot even bring herself to say whether a 15-week-old unborn child is a human being.
Imagine how fanatically devoted to politics one must be to deny even one’s most life-affirming experiences.

What a missed opportunity to support life and encourage women! She’s had five children and still rose to the third highest political position in the country. She could wear her motherhood like a proud badge of honor encouraging all women that you can have the blessings of motherhood and still achieve your goals.

The Battleground of Genders

God was very specific when He created only two, genders: Male and female.

So God created human beings in his own image. In the image of God he created them; male and female he created them. Gen. 1:27 NLT

We also know that the woman Eve was created as a helpmate for the man Adam. Then the Lord God said, “It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a helper who is just right for him.” Gen. 2:8

We’re told in God’s Word that men and women would marry and come together sexually to continue populating the earth. Any deviation from God’s plan was an abomination and a sin. Period.

When my grandson was nine-years-old, he pointed out that of course men were not supposed to have sex with men or women with women because then the world would end!! There would be no more babies. No more people. That’s a no brainer even for a nine-year-old!

Even the animals get that! Also take seven pairs of every kind of bird. There must be a male and a female in each pair to ensure that all life will survive on the earth after the flood. Gen. 7:3 NLT.

Only Satan could try to subvert God’s plan for humanity by causing what we now call “gender confusion.” Again, confusion does not come from God, it comes from Satan.

Confused men who think life would be better as a woman have demanded legal rights to pretend they’re women. They’re allowed to invade the private and public spaces of women in bathrooms, locker and dressing rooms, spas, beauty contests, and even competing in sports against biological women!

Logically and anatomically this is ludicrous and lewd, but instead of rationale people standing up for protecting women, the government is bending to social pressure from a fringe element.

A man is now “Miss Nevada!” A biological 43-year-old male who “identifies as a woman” from New Zealand will compete in women’s weightlifting at the Olympics.

How many biological women do you see trying to compete in men’s sports? Not many or maybe none.

We’re told it’s discrimination to not let confused men “identify” as women with all the privileges, but what about the rights of real women? Why isn’t this male invasion considered discrimination against women?

In a commentary by Joe Saunders in The Western Journal, Saunders wrote about comments from NFL quarterback Brett Favre.

He was never more on target than when he nailed the issue of transgender “women” competing against true females on the biggest stages in sports. Liberals are going to hate it, but no sane, honest person — man or woman — could disagree.
“It’s a man competing as a woman,” Favre said with characteristic bluntness. “That’s unfair.”
Every human past puberty understands that there are basic physiological differences between men and women. It’s just that in the 21st century, liberals seem to have decided ideology trumps biology.

The Battleground of Motherhood

Last week, I wrote about this battleground and I’ll refer you to that blog “Never Poke a Mama Bear” where I point out that Nancy Pelosi and the Democrats are trying to eliminate Mother and replace with “birthing people.” Do you think Pelosi’s five kids call her their birthing person?

What’s a Woman to Do?

We must stay educated on the issues facing women today and consider them from God’s perspective. Educate our children and grandchildren to not become influenced or persuaded by the ways and sways of the world.

If you know someone influenced negatively by false teachings or ideologies, take the time to talk with them and pray for and with them. Share with them God’s purpose and plans for men and women and why He made us different and unique with specific life roles.

Get involved. Don’t be afraid to stand up against wrong. Like the woman who protested when a male came into the women and children’s area of a spa in California and exposed himself. One of her comments was that other women were afraid to come forward and confront the spa owners who were allowing such an atrocity. But she wasn’t afraid and good for her!

Silence in the face of wrong is wrong itself!

Our tendency often is to avoid adversity but Jesus never avoided sharing the truth even when it wasn’t welcomed or convenient.

The spiritual battle isn’t between Democrats vs Republicans or liberals vs conservatives. It’s between wrong vs right, evil vs good. Satan vs Jesus. The enemy vs the Savior!

It’s easy to say we know who wins in the end so let’s not get involved, but other people are hurt when we don’t engage. The Christian life isn’t about standing quietly on the sidelines; it’s about standing boldly on the Lord’s side of the spiritual battle.

What Satan means for evil, God will use for good! He’ll use those of us who are willing to join Him in the fight for right. I hope you’re in the Lord’s army. I am.

¹⁰Finally, be strong in the Lord and in his mighty power. ¹¹Put on the full armor of God, so that you can take your stand against the devil’s schemes. ¹²For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms. ¹³Therefore put on the full armor of God, so that when the day of evil comes, you may be able to stand your ground, and after you have done everything, to stand. Eph. 6:10-13

The Lord has given me Joshua 1:9 not just once but several times today, so I leave you with a theme verse from my book Everyday Brave: Living Courageously as a Woman of Faith.

If you received this blog by email, please leave a comment here! Thank you. I answer every comment.

July 12, 2021

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Never Poke A Mama Bear

I’m sure by now you’ve seen the video clips that went viral of moms and dads confronting local school boards protesting the mandatory teaching in schools of Marxist critical race theory where children are taught to judge each other by the color of their skin. If your skin is dark, you’re oppressed and if your skin is white, you’re the oppressor.

You can’t get more racist or Communist than to teach these radical untruths to children in school and foster their mistrust and animosity toward each other at an early age. This is the exact opposite of what our Constitution and God affirms that all men are created equal regardless of race, color, or creed.

So I say bravo to those brave and concerned parents, like my daughter Kim in the opening picture, who are not going to allow their children to be indoctrinated in Marxist/Communist theology and ideology.

The parents speaking up at these school council meetings are black, white, brown and some had escaped Communist and oppressive countries and were not about to let their children be raised in a country where the leadership and school boards are quickly shifting their values to resemble the countries they fled.

When an interviewer asked one of the mothers at a school board meeting, who just happened to be black, why she was speaking up against critical race theory she responded, “Never poke this mama bear.” I think every mother knows exactly what she meant. When you start messing with our kids, moms are always going to rise up to protect them. Or at least they should.

An article titled “Largest teachers union says critical race theory is ‘reasonable and appropriate’ for kids, outlines what these parents are up against. Here’s an excerpt:

The National Education Association has approved a plan to “publicize” critical race theory and dedicate a “team of staffers” to assist union members looking to “fight back against anti-CRT rhetoric.”
New Business Item 39 also declares that the union opposes bans on critical race theory and the New York Times’ controversial 1619 Project – which roughly half the U.S. states have already implemented.
Additionally, the resolution calls for the union to “join with Black Lives Matter at School and the Zinn Education Project to call for a rally this year on Oct. 14 — George Floyd’s birthday — as a national day of action to teach lessons about structural racism and oppression.”

Get Involved!

Do you remember during the 2016 election when Franklin Graham went to the Capitol in every state pleading with people to vote their values? My daughter and I took the three grandkids to hear him as he stood on the Boise Capitol steps and one of the points he made was for Christians to get involved with the governing of their cities and states. Run for office. Make sure Christian and Conservative values are represented and heard in local government and decision making issues. He specifically mentioned running for school boards because there’s nothing more important than guarding the education and minds of our children.

It almost seems like Franklin was prophetic as we watch the lunacy of liberal school boards. Not just in wanting to teach Communist indoctrination, but also in the pornographic immoral way many are presenting “sex education” starting in Kindergarten. Teaching gay and transgender lifestyles as normal options for children. Fostering gender confusion.

I heard former White House Press Secretary Kayleigh McEnany say in an interview that she’s only going to send her little girl, who is now a toddler, to parochial schools because she knows she won’t have to worry about what her daughter is being taught. This mama bear is protecting her cub from danger.

The Devil always goes after the children because they’re the next generation who will influence the world for either good or evil. We’re watching the fallout of teachers who have gone through the liberal progressive school system themselves and are onboard with biased teaching. Any teachers who speak up or refuse to teach what they know is wrong are often fired.

No one who is born of God will continue to sin, because God’s seed remains in them; they cannot go on sinning, because they have been born of God. ¹⁰This is how we know who the children of God are and who the children of the devil are: Anyone who does not do what is right is not God’s child, nor is anyone who does not love their brother and sister. 1 John 3:9-11

But parents and grandparents, you can’t be fired! You can protest and refuse to let your sweet innocent children be taught what you know is wrong.

You have a voice. You have a vote. You have a choice.

Masks and Vaccinations for Children

Another area you’re going to face in the fall as schools open up is school districts who want to enforce mandatory masks and vaccinations for your children to attend school. There are numerous studies showing how unsafe both of these practices can be for children.

Do your own investigation. Be informed. Pray about it. Make an educated decision and then take a firm vocal stand for what you know is right for your child!

In Communist countries, the government has more control over children than the parents do. Don’t let this happen in America. Don’t surrender your rights as a parent.

You might think I’m being a bit dramatic, but the way Satan gets a foothold is to subtly and slyly slither into normal life and before you know it, evil has become the norm.

I’ll be writing next week about the War On Women! One of the liberal’s sly strategies is to devalue and demean the role of mothers by referring to them as merely “birthing people.” Cancel motherhood! We can laugh at how ridiculous this is but the Democrats actually wrote that insidious term into the infrastructure bill so they weren’t laughing. They were serious.

Black Lives Matter’s manifesto is to eliminate the nuclear family and have BLM take over that role. As BLM infiltrates Democrat government and teachers unions, we’re seeing their influence and ideologies seep into language and legislature.

One of the first things the Democrat house majority ruled in January 2021 was to eliminate the use of gender identity including mother, father, husband, and wife. As reported in the Washington Examiner . . .
“The proposed rule package seeks to “honor all gender identities” by striking words including “seaman,” “chairman,” “father,” “mother,” “sister,” “husband,” and “wife” from use and replacing them with gender-neutral terms including “seafarer,” “chair,” “parent,” “child,” and “sibling.”

“Speaker of the House Nancy Pelosi praised the “visionary rules package,” saying in a statement the package “reflects the views and values of the full range of our historically diverse House Democratic Majority.”

House Minority Leader Kevin McCarthy mocked the proposed changes, calling them “stupid,” while Representative-elect Marjorie Taylor Green called the measures a “blatant denial of truth” and an “attack on families.”

Why would Nancy Pelosi, a wife, mother, and grandmother, now praise eliminating those endearing ageless family terms? Since she admits that this “reflects the views and values of the full range of our historically diverse House Democratic Majority,” you know the left’s views and values have become sinister and dangerous.

Woe to those who call evil good and good evil, who put darkness for light and light for darkness, who put bitter for sweet and sweet for bitter. Is. 5:20

So Mama Bears, you’re being poked from all directions.

Pick your battles.

Pray for guidance.

Protect your children and family.

Publically make a difference.

Be alert and of sober mind. Your enemy the devil prowls around like a roaring lion looking for someone to devour. 1 Peter 5:8

The father of a righteous child has great joy;
a man who fathers a wise son rejoices in him.
²⁵May your father and mother rejoice;
may she who gave you birth be joyful. Pr. 23:24-26

If you received this post by email, please leave a comment here.

Political cartoon is by editorial cartoonist A.F.Branco A.F. Branco Cartoon – You Know, the Thing – Comically Incorrect.

Picture of the parents is from the article cited in the blog.
Opening picture is my daughter Kim Mancini taken on Mother’s Day!

July 5, 2021

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Virtual Grandparents’ Day of Prayer!

Have you heard about the Virtual Grandparents Day of Prayer?

Since two of my granddaughters and their friends visited us this past week, I thought it was a perfect time to remind you of National Grandparents Day on September 13, 2020.

The Christian Grandparenting Network (CGN) wants to make it a Day of Prayer for our grandchildren and their parents! This year they’re adding a virtual element to allow grandparents to pray together.

My friend Lillian Penner has provided information below to explain more about this day and how to participate.

What Is the Need?

The enemy prowls like a lion, infiltrating our culture with lies and deception. He attacks our families at all levels.

Even our Christian faith is under attack. As a result, parents and grandparents find themselves in a tug-of-war for the souls of their children and grandchildren.

Paul warns us, “For a time is coming when people will no longer listen to sound and wholesome teaching. They will follow their own desires and will look for teachers who will tell them whatever their itching ears want to hear. They will reject the truth and chase after myths” (2 Timothy 4:3-4).

Barna Research confirms Paul’s warning. Fifty-eight percent of adults living in the United States agree that “identifying moral truth is up to each individual; there are no moral absolutes that apply to everyone, all the time. Surprisingly, forty-eight percent of adults identified as born-again Christians agreed with the statement.”[1]

God has given grandparents a sacred trust – an opportunity to imprint another generation with His love and faithfulness. We need to intercede for the hearts, minds, and souls of our grandchildren and their parents, praying they don’t fall captive to the enemy’s deception.

With this in mind, the Prayer Ministry is inviting you and your church families to join us on National Grandparents’ Day (September 13th) for a Virtual Grandparents’ Day of Prayer.

WHAT IS A “VIRTUAL GRANDPARENTS’ DAY OF PRAYER”?

Several years ago, the prayer ministry of Christian Grandparenting Network (CGN) saw the urgency to establish a day for grandparents to unite in prayer. Under the leadership of Lillian Penner, the second Sunday of September was named Grandparents’ Day of Prayer. This day coincided with the National Grandparents’ Day in the United States.

Churches enthusiastically responded by hosting events such as grandparent prayer breakfasts, luncheons and afternoon teas.

The present pandemic has forced many churches to close or limit the amount of available seating. Therefore, instead of the traditional Grandparents’ Day of Prayer, we are inviting you, as grandparents, to observe a Virtual Grandparents’ Day of Prayer on September 13th. We are encouraging you to pray with at least one other grandparent over the phone, via a conferencing tool such as Zoom, or in-person with careful observance of social distancing guidelines.

To learn more about participation go to https://christiangrandparenting.com/prayer/grandparents-day-of-prayer/

May God bless you richly as you pray for your grandchildren,

Lillian Penner,

GDOP Coordinator,

Christian Grandparenting Prayer ministry

[email protected]

[1] The findings are part of the American Worldview Inventory and were released by George Barna, director of research at the cultural research center at Arizona Christian University.

August 17, 2020

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What Is God’s Response to ‘Ok Boomer’?

“Mom, are you a boomer?” my eleven-year old granddaughter asked my daughter.

I have to admit that none of the adults at the dinner table understood the significance of that question and so I naively answered, “No, Grammie and Grampa are boomers.” She seemed satisfied, but I continued to ponder her question. So a few days later, I texted her that boomers were born between 1946-1964. She said “thanks,” but still I wondered the genesis of her question. Something else was going on.

Then I began to see articles degrading boomers almost to the point of using ‘boomer’ as a slang or curse word, and then I REALLY wanted to know about my granddaughter’s interest in ‘boomer.’ So I asked her and she said, “Sometimes when I say something, my friends say, ‘Ok boomer,’ when I’m talking like an old person.” And that’s bad? I thought.

But it turns out it is very bad if an eleven-year old might have the perspective of something her grandmother or grandfather taught her, even if that wisdom came from a 2020 year-old person, Jesus Christ.

Being a Boomer Was Special!

I’m a boomer and I must admit most of my life it’s been a rather prestigious position. We were the largest generation in history at that time, born in the two decades after World War II when the surviving soldiers returned home after defeating the enemy. They were ready to bring normalcy back to life, get jobs, raise a family, and enjoy the American dream and ideals they fought so bravely to defend.

Because boomers represented such a vast number of consumers and voters, we influenced fashion and trends, politics, economics, business, entertainment, religion . . . the culture.

We felt respected and appreciated. And then we weren’t. Like every generation, we’ve aged, and as the “old fogies” before us, we suddenly don’t know anything and no one cares about what we want anymore. We’ve become the generation that younger people facetiously and dismissively respond to with an “Ok Boomer,” while rolling their eyes. Not in an admiring or gotcha’ manner, but you’re an old person with views and values we no longer appreciate. In fact, we’re going to blame all the world’s problems on your generation that you left for us to inherit. You’re out of touch with our problems and we don’t want to hear what you think about it.

Ouch!

Aja Romano wrote in her article “OK boomer” isn’t just about the past. It’s about our apocalyptic future.

“OK boomer is meant to be cutting and dismissive. It suggests that the conversation around the anxieties and concerns of younger generations has become so exhausting and unproductive that the younger generations are collectively over it. OK boomer implies that the older generation misunderstands millennial and Gen Z culture and politics so fundamentally that years of condescension and misrepresentation have led to this pointedly terse rebuttal and rejection. Rather than endlessly defend decisions stemming from deep economic strife, to save money instead of investing in stocks and retirement funds, to buy avocados instead of cereal — teens and younger adults are simply through.”

How Can Christians Bridge the OK Boomer Generation Gaps?

Now that I am old and gray,
do not abandon me, O God.
Let me proclaim your power to this new generation,
your mighty miracles to all who come after me. Psalm 71:18 NLT

Where there are differences, Satan will use them to divide.

[Tweet “Where there are differences, Satan will use them to divide. We see that division in politics, religion, and culture but now more than ever, it rears it’s ugly head in generational antagonism. “]

We see that division in politics, religion, and culture but now more than ever, it rears it’s ugly head in generational antagonism. Yes, we can say that’s always existed, but did it in your family. Did you think your grandparents were completely out of touch with the real world or did you respect and admire their wisdom?

I learned to appreciate Scripture from Granny Reed, who always read from her Bible to my cousins and me as we literally sat at her feet. Granny Hazel taught me how to care for my complexion and played games with me when she came to visit. They were a wealth of experience and I looked forward to spending time with them.

I challenge you that #OKBoomer” is not biblical!

[Tweet “God knew that Satan could use our age differences to divide us so God gave us many Scriptures to help bridge these inevitable generation gaps, and He commands us to live by them.”]

God knew that Satan could use our age differences to divide us so God gave us many Scriptures to help bridge these inevitable generation gaps, and He commands us to live by them.

Generation after generation stands in awe of your work;
each one tells stories of your mighty acts. Psalm 145:4 The Message

_________________________________

Let me share a few excerpts from the chapter “Generation Gaps Are Not In God’s Plan” from my book Mentoring for All Seasons.

Why Do We Have Generation Gaps?

[Tweet “It was never God’s plan to have generation gaps in the church: God commanded one generation to pass down his truths to the next generation.”]

It was never God’s plan to have generation gaps in the church: God commanded one generation to pass down his truths to the next generation. But in most churches today, the gap between generations is so wide the only thing passed between the two is mistrust and misunderstanding—all in the name of Jesus.

I believe the older generation often perpetuates the gap by wanting everything to stay the same—same music, same way of doing things, same church service, same church activities. . . . Many churches relegate the young people to their own groups, and their input—whether in music or new ideas or using their talents and gifts—isn’t welcome in the main sanctuary. Then the church wonders why the youth and young adults are leaving in droves.

If we want to stay relevant in the lives of the next generation, we need to learn how to embrace their style of worship . . . their way of communicating . . . their world. If we want to have an impact in their lives—to help guide them in the ways of righteousness—we need to speak their language, care about the things they care about, and reach out to them in love with a desire to understand what’s important to them.

Mentoring: A Privilege Not a Burden

[Tweet “Do you remember when you were the next generation full of hope and ideas and ready to leave your mark on the world? I do. I also remember feeling misunderstood and unappreciated when sharing thoughts and ideas with older adults”]

Do you remember when you were the next generation full of hope and ideas and ready to leave your mark on the world? I do. I also remember feeling misunderstood and unappreciated when sharing thoughts and ideas with older adults. Yet thirty-six times in the New Living Translation of the Bible, the Lord uses the term “generation to generation.” Many more verses instruct us to pour into those who are coming up behind us in the church and in our homes. It was God’s plan for the continuation of his church throughout the generations.

Believers are to teach and train the next generation. Praise God, over the centuries believers have followed this mandate. You and I are benefactors of the sacrifices of believers who have gone before us. Over the years, followers of God and his Son, Jesus Christ, have felt compelled to ensure the next generation:

Has access to and knowledge of the Bible.
Knows how to communicate with God through the Holy Spirit and prayer.
Receives guidance in leading a godly life.

[Tweet “Sharing with the next generation some of what God and life has taught us is truly an honor and a privilege.”]

Sharing with the next generation some of what God and life has taught us is truly an honor and a privilege. “I will bring honor to your name in every generation. Therefore, the nations will praise you forever and ever.” (Ps. 45:17 NLT)

A Plea from the Younger Generation

[Tweet “I often hear from the older generation that the reason they don’t mentor is because the younger generations aren’t interested in being mentored, but his is a misconception and lie of the enemy.”]

I often hear from the older generation that the reason they don’t mentor is because the younger generations aren’t interested in being mentored, but his is a misconception and lie of the enemy. A young woman named Tracy, [and there were many more like her in Mentoring for All Seasons] pleads, “I beg the older generations to please be the mentor God called you to be—take up your cross and invest in the future. It takes patience, perseverance, and Christianity. The woman you invest in today may turn around and invest in tomorrow’s generation.”

_______________________________

[Tweet “If you’re a boomer like me, let’s continue the trend of being the largest influential generation for God!”]

If you’re a boomer like me, let’s continue the trend of being the largest influential generation for God!

That means we ignore the exasperated #OKBoomer meme and turn it into an eager #OKBoomer share with me what you’ve learned about God. Let’s not be offended by this meme but use it for God’s glory!

If you’re one of the younger generations, seek out a Christian boomer who will share with you how God helped her through the seasons of her life and is eager to bestow some of that God-fueled faith with you.

³Similarly, teach the older women to live in a way that honors God. They must not slander others or be heavy drinkers.^[a] Instead, they should teach others what is good. ⁴These older women must train the younger women to love their husbands and their children, ⁵to live wisely and be pure, to work in their homes,^[b] to do good, and to be submissive to their husbands. Then they will not bring shame on the word of God. Titus 2:3-5 NLT

Mentoring for All Seasons: Sharing Life and God’s Faithfulness is available signed and personalized on my website or also on Amazon and Kindle.

February 17, 2020

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If You’re Pro-life, You’re Pro-Woman!

I woke up the morning of January 24 excited and eager to watch the 2020 March for Life on TV. For the first time in the forty-seven years of this annual march, a President, our President Trump, was going to speak in person! A bold and brave step in the current political climate.

I made my coffee and turned on the TV, but to my dismay, no reception. Looking out the window, I saw snow on our cable Dish, and even though we cover it with a trash bag, sometimes the weight of the snow or ice inhibits the DISH from operating properly.

Knowing how important this was to me, hubby put on his snow clothes and boots, grabbed the brush to clear the DISH, and plodded out through the snow in what was now rain. A true act of love!

The TV screen finally came alive, but now what channel would be broadcasting this momentous event? Surely, no mainstream media since they were too busy championing the impeachment trial.

Again, hubby to the rescue located the march on C-Span just as the program was starting. Then with an opening prayer, a welcome from pro-life Vice President Pence and his wife streamed in from Italy where they’re meeting with the Pope, President Trump strode onto the stage to address the tens of thousands of marchers ready to take up their Pro-Life signs and march for the right to life of the unborn.

[Tweet “One sign at the March for Life was especially poignant as it portrayed the birth of Jesus in a manger with the words “An Unplanned Pregnancy Saved Us All!””]

One sign was especially poignant as it portrayed the birth of Jesus in a manger with the words “An Unplanned Pregnancy Saved Us All!” We know that Mary and Joseph didn’t plan that pregnancy, but God did as He plans each and every pregnancy!

As President Trump greeted the crowd, he reiterated how proud he was to stand with the advocates for life to “protect the right of every child, born and unborn, to fulfill their God-given potential.”

A few of his remarks:

[Tweet “Every child is a precious and sacred gift from God. Together, we must protect, cherish, and defend the dignity and the sanctity of every human life.” President Trump at the March for Life”]

“All of us here today understand an eternal truth: Every child is a precious and sacred gift from God. Together, we must protect, cherish, and defend the dignity and the sanctity of every human life.”

“When we see the image of a baby in the womb, we glimpse the majesty of God’s creation.”

“As the Bible tells us, each person is wonderfully made.”

“Together, we are the voice for the voiceless.”

What If You’ve Had an Abortion or Know Someone Who Has?

[Tweet “If you’ve had an abortion, please know that God loves you and is ready to forgive if you only ask. ‘There is forgiveness of sins for all who repent. Luke 24:27 NLT”]

If you’ve had an abortion, please know that God loves you and is ready to forgive if you only ask. ‘There is forgiveness of sins for all who repent. Luke 24:27 NLT

I’m sure it hurts to hear and read about pro-life speeches and marches when you don’t know what to do with your pain and sorrow. I encourage you to share your story with a trustworthy person. Someone who will pray with you and keep your confidence. It’s healing to talk about your feelings and not let them fester in your heart where they can lead to bitterness and self-deprecating efforts to soothe remorse.

If you know someone who has had an abortion, offer to be a listening ear. Pray with and for her. Assist her in finding the help and support she needs to experience the peace and forgiveness her heart craves.

Life Empowers: Pro-Life is Pro-Woman

The March for Life chose the above theme this year because 2020 marks one hundred years since the 19^th Amendment giving women the inalienable right to vote.

[Tweet “From the beginning of time, God empowered women with the incredible ability and responsibility of bringing new life into the world. Eve, whose name means “life-giving” was the first mother through which the entire world populated.”]

But from the beginning of time, God empowered women with the incredible ability and responsibility of bringing new life into the world. Eve, whose name means “Life-giving,” was the first mother from which the entire world would populate. Eve also means “Mother of All Who Have Life.”

[Tweet “Only a woman is empowered by God with the capability and privilege of carrying a human life in her womb.”]

Only a woman is empowered by God with the capability and privilege of carrying a human life in her womb. To feel her baby as it grows. The first kick. The first hiccup. The first rollover. That is our amazing joy as women to bring another person into the world. New creations, each one designed by God unique with its own DNA, fingerprint, and purpose.

You made all the delicate, inner parts of my body
and knit me together in my mother’s womb.
Thank you for making me so wonderfully complex!
Your workmanship is marvelous—how well I know it. Psalm 139:13-14 NLT

God picks the time of each child’s conception! Sometimes His timing coincides with our desires, but like everything God does, it’s not always on our terms or times. That’s why He’s God and we’re not.

[Tweet “With the advent of ultrasounds, unborn babies may be voiceless, but they’re not invisible and their heartbeats are clearly heard.”]

With the advent of ultrasounds, unborn babies may be voiceless, but they’re not invisible and their heartbeats are clearly heard. It’s the Devil’s lie that these aren’t precious little human beings to be incubated and nourished in their mommy’s tummy until they burst forth with their first breath and cry. Both bodies intertwined from the moment of conception, bonding even before birth. That’s how God designed the mystery and majesty of creation.

Abortion is the ultimate exploitation of women.

[Tweet “Abortion is the ultimate exploitation of women.”]

The case for abortion is based on lies and manipulation. Abortion has become a cash cow funding industries and organizations like Planned Parenthood who lie to women and tell them their baby isn’t really human and that they won’t feel a thing. The truth is that they will feel their searing loss for the rest of their lives. Those women who sadly tout and brag about how liberating their abortions have been are trying to convince themselves that they didn’t really eliminate their own children.

What Can We Do?

As Christians, we need to remember that God doesn’t conform to man’s laws!

We can’t stand idly by and do nothing or think abortion isn’t our issue because it might not affect us personally or it’s “legal.” As I mentioned in last week’s blog post, apathy is the antithesis of the Christian life.

We need to let what breaks God’s heart, break our hearts.

I know you may have other good causes that you’re giving your time and energy too, but I ask: What could have been more important than saving the life and future of the 61,000,000 babies aborted? The purpose and plans God had for these baby boys and girls?

You don’t have to walk in a march or carry a sign to be an advocate for life.

As speakers pointed out in the Walk for Life, we have the right and obligation to vote for this Human Rights Issue. With our empowered vote, we choose government legislatures and presidents who don’t just talk about changing the status quo, but are willing to risk their political future and reputation to save the next generation of babies.

Who will go up against the liberal left?

Who will use the power we give him or her to not just maintain limits on abortion, but abolish it completely?

[Tweet “No woman or man should have the right to make a choice that ends in savagely taking a life and calling it legal.”]

No woman or man should have the right to make a choice that ends in savagely taking a life and calling it legal.

I challenge you that silence is compliance. Not taking a stand for right is inadvertently taking a stand for wrong.

[Tweet “Silence is compliance. Not taking a stand for right is inadvertently taking a stand for wrong.”]

I applaud each of you with a burden in your heart for the babies tortured, dismembered, and horrifically burned every second of every day because Satan spreads the lie that an unborn child does not have the inalienable right to life.

For everyone reading this blog, and I know there will be many unsubscribes, I pray that God speaks to your soul with what He wants you to do. Because there is no denying there will be a price to pay for this bloodstain on our nation as God asks: I saved you, why aren’t you saving the children?

Our Family’s Adoption Story

I have an amazing grandson because fifteen years ago a pregnant 15-year-old girl chose life for her second baby, while she was still raising her 18-month-old first baby and attending high school! She managed to keep her pregnancy a secret from her mom for seven months, when fifteen years ago abortion wasn’t an option at that late stage of pregnancy. Instead, she delivered a beautiful baby boy. My daughter and son-in-law, who suffered from infertility, blessed our family by adopting him and we became his forever family.

While I rejoice and praise God over that young girl’s choice to give her baby, my grandson, an opportunity to live, I cry over the millions of babies who never had the same opportunity.*

“We cannot know what our citizens yet unborn will achieve. The dreams they will imagine. The masterpieces they will create. The discoveries they will make. But we know this: every life brings love into this world, every child brings joy to a family. Every person is worth protecting. And above all, we know that every human soul is divine and every human life, born and unborn, is made in the holy image of Almighty God.” President Donald J. Trump

Yet you brought me safely from my mother’s womb
and led me to trust you at my mother’s breast.
¹⁰I was thrust into your arms at my birth.
You have been my God from the moment I was born. Psalm 22:9-10 NLT

You can watch President Trump speaking at the 2020 March for Life and/or read the transcript at LifeSitenews.com.

Read two of our daughters’ infertility stories and about my grandson’s adoption in Dear God, Why Can’t I Have a Baby?

In my book Mentoring for All Seasons, there’s a section on “Pregnancy—Planned and Unplanned” with tips and Scripture on how to mentor a pregnant woman, Teen Mom, and “Post-Abortion Recovery” section for mentoring a woman who has had an abortion.

In Everyday Brave, the chapter on “Brave Mothers” includes a testimony of Kathleen, a brave teen mom who chose to keep and raise her baby, who twenty-eight years later is a digital media arts teacher. In the chapter “Brave Believer,”
Penelope tells her brave story of being an RN Circulator in operating rooms and refusing to participate in abortion procedures even though it could jeopardize her career and she received much ridicule from her peers.

January 27, 2020

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What Kind of Person Kills a Newborn Baby?

My daughter’s birthday was last week, February 26. Since she posted a picture with candles on her cake, I think she’ll be OK with me telling you I gave birth to her forty-six years ago. But like all mothers, when our children have birthdays no matter how old they are, we reminisce about their birth.

Where it took place.

How long or short was our labor?

Hearing our newborn’s first cry.

The nurse laying our precious gift from God on our chest as we kiss his or her cheek.

I remember like it was yesterday. Back then, we didn’t know if we were having a boy or girl, so I still have memories of the doctor holding her up and announcing, “It’s a girl!”

Then the nurse pronounced time of birth at 11:00 AM.

This year, Kim’s birthday fell on the day after Democrats in the US Senate blocked the Born-Alive Abortion Survivors Protection Act, which would mandate that doctors must try to save the life of a baby born after attempts at abortion.

[Tweet “Democrat endorsed legalized infanticide. Republicans voted in favor of bill to save innocent baby’s lives.”]

All Democrats, except for three, endorsed legalized infanticide: killing an infant. While all Republicans, except for three who didn’t vote, voted in favor of the bill to save innocent baby’s lives.

Without the passage of the Born-Alive Abortion Survivors Protection Act, the doctor can legally ask the parents if they want their newborn baby to live or die. If the parent’s give the death sentence to their new baby, the nurse removes the baby and lets this precious creation of God . . . cry or choke to death.

Then the nurse pronounces the time of death.

[Tweet “Doctors can ask parents if they want their newborn baby to live or die.”]

What kind of doctor, who took an oath to save lives, looks at a newborn baby, and asks, “Should we let him or her live or die?

What kind of nurse participates in this barbaric killing?

What kind of mother who gave her baby life, carried her baby in her tummy, went through delivery, and heard her baby’s first cry instructs the doctor to kill her baby?

What kind of Senator knows that this bill has absolutely nothing to do with abortion laws, but everything to do with saving the life of a newborn baby, votes for infanticide?

What kind of “political base” could these Senators be trying to please, who expect them to vote against a Born-Alive Abortion Survivors Protection Act, which would have required that “any health care practitioner present” at the time of a birth “exercise the same degree of professional skill, care, and diligence to preserve the life and health of the child as a reasonably diligent and conscientious health care practitioner would render to any other child born alive at the same gestational age.”

What kind of country tolerates infanticide?

What kind of church leader doesn’t denounce infanticide?

My friend Patti Smith asks this same question in her blog Where is the Outrage of Church Leaders and Infanticide?

What kind of Christian does nothing?

Some friends who are speaking out have said they’ve taken a lot of online abuse from Christians who call this a “moral quandary” – and we should not judge others. I suggest they ask their critics, “So do you consider it judgement or a “moral quandary” to try and stop someone from being murdered?”

Then ask: “If abortion wasn’t legal, would you still think it was okay for a woman to have her baby burned, poisoned, or torn apart? Is it a moral quandary for that baby with a beating heart, who feels pain and is trusting his mommy’s tummy is the safest place in this world, to have a chance at life?”

Our job as Christians is to live by God’s ways, not compromise because they’re not popular.

[Tweet “Our job as Christians is to live by God’s ways, not compromise because they’re not popular.”]

Anyone who says they’re a Bible-believing Christian and refuses to take a stand against abortion, late-term abortion, and now infanticide is falling into Satan’s trap: “Did God really say that we shouldn’t kill, inside or outside the womb, His babies made in His image?” Yes, He did.

Christians must fight for the sanctity of life at all ages! With many Democrats threatening Socialism in America, how long will it be before the government decides how long you can live before you become a burden or inconvenience to society?

The Born-Alive Abortion Survivors Protection Act didn’t effect abortion; it was designed to protect the life of a baby that survives abortion. But here’s the fear of the liberal left and why they voted against it. If they agree that a baby is a human when it’s born after a botched abortion, it leads back to the argument that a baby is a human when the abortion was attempted in the womb. The Democrats couldn’t take the chance that the public might start thinking of unborn babies as humans, so they can’t recognize that the born infant is a human!

The Democrat’s rationale: If parents wanted assisted killing of their baby in the womb, they should be allowed to also have assisted murder of the baby if the abortion failed, and horror of all horrors, their baby lived!

We need to keep reminding the public that from the moment of conception in the mother’s womb, each baby has a unique genetic code with its own personal DNA and fingerprint. Scientifically, no one can deny that humanity is not determined on a sliding scale of whether you’re wanted or not wanted. The March for Life theme this year was “Unique from Day One!”

[Tweet “The Democrats couldn’t take the chance that the public might start thinking of unborn babies as humans”]

It’s unimaginable that we’ve arrived at a time in a supposedly civilized society where we’ve reverted to barbaric times when babies were drowned or left on a hillside to die if they weren’t wanted. Or like in the days of the worship of Bael, burned alive.

⁴“‘For Israel has forsaken me and turned this valley into a place of wickedness. The people burn incense to foreign gods—idols never before acknowledged by this generation, by their ancestors, or by the kings of Judah. And they have filled this place with the blood of innocent children. ⁵They have built pagan shrines to Baal, and there they burn their sons as sacrifices to Baal. I have never commanded such a horrible deed; it never even crossed my mind to command such a thing!” Jeremiah 19:4-5 NLT

When I visited with my daughter on her birthday, she said that before going to bed the night before, she had read the final Senate ruling on the Born-Alive Abortion Survivors Protection Act. She, like many of us, couldn’t sleep. She kept thinking of all the birthday wishes she would receive celebrating her life, while thousands of newborn babies would never see their first day of life because they were unwanted, an inconvenience.

No celebration of his or her life. No funeral. Their coffin a trash can. Nameless. The abortionist was supposed to murder the baby before it was born. Now they’re live human beings left to die, and maybe even dismembered and body parts sold.

Kim realized she has life because I wanted her and loved her. She has three children that she dearly loves, and her first child was adopted from a teenage mom who didn’t abort but chose to give her baby life and give our family a blessing.

[Tweet “How could a mother who gave birth to her child choose death for that child?”]

It was hard for Kim to reconcile, as it is for any of us mothers, that a woman could give birth and then choose death for her child.

With states like New York passing laws that a baby can be aborted up and through delivery, and now infanticide, the one hope we can cling to is that the public will become outraged and no longer able to ignore the atrocities of abortion.

A civil society doesn’t kill its babies in the womb or in the world.

[Tweet “A civil society doesn’t kill its babies in the womb or in the world.”]

And yet, Abortion is the Leading Cause of Death in 2018 with 41 Million Killed.”

“Globally, just under a quarter of all pregnancies (23 percent) were ended by abortion in 2018, and for every 33 live births, ten infants were aborted. There were more deaths from abortion in 2018 than all deaths from cancer, malaria, HIV/AIDS, smoking, alcohol, and traffic accidents combined.”

Listen to this interview of Ainsley Earhardt with a former abortionist as he describes why he stopped “murdering” other people’s baby boys and girls. You need to hear this. Have a Kleenex ready. Then support the upcoming movie Unplanned in which he plays the part of an abortionist. He’s not an actor, but who knows better how to portray the horror than someone who has experienced it firsthand.

I encourage you also to listen to an interview with Nebraska Senator Ben Sasse the Born-Alive Abortion Survivors Protection Act’s, chief sponsor.

Listen to a mother who almost aborted her baby until told by Planned Parenthood practitioners that if her baby was delivered alive, they would break it’s neck!

I hope the interviews and the movie trailer keep you up at night too. I hope you’re asking God what He wants you to do about this travesty. I hope you’re not thinking who are you to make a difference. You are a believer, that’s who you are, and that makes all the difference!

I hope you’re championing for life, because anyone of us could be related to a baby who was left on a cold metal table to die and ended up in a trashcan, maybe torn apart.

What to Do With Your Anger Over Evil

Don’t Just Cry, Do Something!

I’m just a baby, without a voice
Life interrupted by another’s choice
My heart was beating…but now it has ceased
And my precious life didn’t end in peace
I cried and I cried…but to no avail
Couldn’t you hear me? Why did you fail?
To give me a chance to sing my own song
I could have dreamed dreams, but now they are gone
I was a baby…but now I’m no more
Life interrupted by a vote on the floor
But I hold no grudge for the wrong that you’ve done
For I’m now in the arms of Jesus, God’s son
With millions of others, who had the same plea
I’m just a baby…please look out for me.

Merissa Lee Kelley
Feb 28, 2019

“Your eyes saw my unformed body; all the days ordained
for me were written in your book before one of them came
to be.” Psalm 139:16

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March 4, 2019

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Are You The Woman Today You Want Your Daughter to Become?

If you’ve followed me for awhile, you know I’ve been writing, editing, and proofing a new book, Mentoring for All Seasons: Sharing Life Experiences and God’s Faithfulness. Last week, I turned in my final proof edit to the publishers, Leafwood Publisher, as I anticipate it’s September 12, 2017 release. Then I learned the exciting news that this book is now on Amazon ready for preorders! You can order now, and as soon as it’s in stock at Amazon, you’ll receive your pre-release copies. The more preorders, the more they bring in stock. Will you help me get this book into the hands of mentors and mentees, those wanting to know how to be a mentor or mentee, and Women’s Ministry Directors to guide women in all seasons of their life.

This book will guide and equip women from tweens to twilight seasons in how to biblically mentor or be a mentee! I think it’s the first book of it’s kind written for both M&M’S! One endorser has already said every Women’s Ministry Director needs this book in her library. As the summer goes on, I’ll share more tidbits about this book for all women. So drum roll please . . . I’m unveiling the cover!

The Mothering Season

[Tweet “When I speak to woman about mentoring, I tell them that their first mentoring responsibility is to their daughters if they have daughters or nieces. “]

When I speak to women about mentoring, I tell them that their first mentoring responsibility is to their daughters if they have daughters or nieces. They’re the role model for these young girls and they’re mentoring to them what it looks like to be a woman today: either a woman of the world or a woman of the Word. And then, I ask the question: Are you the woman today you want your daughters to become because they’re watching you, and as much as they don’t want to be like you, they will probably become just like you at sometime in their life.

In Praying for Your Prodigal Daughter, I share how during my backsliding years, my daughter wanted to be just like me. I realized some of the poor choices she was making were a reflection of the poor choices she was watching me make.

That was a huge revelation to me that I needed to make some changes in my life. When I did rededicate my life to the Lord and start living a godly life, she didn’t want any part of it. She liked the way we were living more by the world’s standards than by God’s ways. And that’s the story I talk about in Praying for Your Prodigal Daughter. I went down on my knees and prayed Scripture for her daily for six years; all the time showing and role modeling for her the blessings of being a rededicated woman of faith.

[Tweet “I went down on my knees and prayed Scripture for my daughter daily role modeling a woman of faith.”]

I’m happy to say our story took a happy turn and Kim did eventually give her heart to Jesus, and she has done a much better job than I did raising her three children in a Christian household. She’s mentored them in character qualities that her two daughters and son are obviously noticing. For a school project, 3^rd grader Sienna was to write why her mom should be in People Magazine. I must admit, I was troubled by this teacher’s choice of a magazine that 3^rd graders had no business knowing about or writing an article for, so I was relieved when Sienna said she had no idea what People Magazine was, anyway!

[Tweet “Would your children see these character qualities in you?”]

But what did impress me were the character qualities Sienna wrote that she saw in her mom. My daughter is a fitness instructor with a fabulous figure, she’s gorgeous, dresses stylishly, and always looks beautiful. So when Sienna decided to write about why her mom should be on the cover of People Magazine, she easily could have talked about these superficial, outward qualities, but at eight-years old this is what she wrote, exactly how she wrote it, no edits from Grammie:

My mom should be on the cover of the People magazine. My mom’s name is Kim Mancini. My mom is medium height, has brown hair, and her eyes are brown. There are so many reasons why my mom should be on the cover of the People Magazine.

One of the amazing things about my mom is that she is trustworthy. My mom trusts me all the time. My mom does not lie. My mom is trustworthy with my whole family. Now you know why my mom is trustworthy.

My mom is the most honest person in the world. She is honest with me. She once said, “Do not be scared that’s not real.” My mom is honest with my grandparents. There is no doubt, my mom should be on the People Magazine because she is so honest.

My mom is so helpful. My mom helps me when I am hurt. My mom helps me with my homework. She helps me get ready for school. My mom should win an award for being the best mom ever. My mom is the best mom in the world.

By Sienna

“The Lord does not look at the things people look at. People look at the outward appearance, but the Lord looks at the heart.” 1 Samuel 16:7

Sienna’s mom, is trustworthy, honest, and helpful. Later she wished she had included hardworking. Isn’t that what every mom wants all her children, not just her daughters, to say about her?! Good job Kim.

What would your kids write why you should be on the cover of People Magazine?

The Mancini family. Sienna is next to her brother

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June 5, 2017

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Who Will Care for the Widows and Fatherless this Christmas?

^“Pure and genuine religion in the sight of God the Father means caring for orphans and widows in their distress and refusing to let the world corrupt you.” James 1:27 NLT

Each week I wonder what God will have me share with you in the Monday Morning Blog, and then God shows up. This week it was clear from several sources, even the Book of Job, that God wanted me to address the topic of widows and the fatherless at Christmas.

[Tweet “God has a focus throughout the Bible of making sure His people care for the widows and orphans.”]

God has a focus throughout the Bible of making sure His people care for the widows and orphans. Sometimes at Christmas, we become so wrapped up (pun intended) with our own hustle and bustle that we can neglect those who most need the gift of Christmas love. And I don’t just mean the Salvation Army bucket, although supporting them is important too.

[Tweet “While widows and their families need help every day, the holidays magnify their need.”]

While widows and their families need help every day, the holidays magnify their need. Some churches do an outstanding job of caring for these families, and others . . . have forgotten God’s charge to the church.

The definition of being a widow means a woman has lost her husband, and if she is a younger widow, she may have children who have lost their father. The children aren’t orphans, but their mother is emotionally, perhaps physically and spiritually, in such pain and anguish that her children may feel like orphans. The mother they once knew will never be the same again. Maybe friends or relatives try to fill the “Mom void” while she’s going through the sudden, unexpected, and unwanted process of making arrangements to bury her husband . . . their dad . . . while she’s still in a state of shock and unimaginable grief and trauma, but no one will ever replace the parents they had before dad was taken from them.

The First Christmas Without Him

Christmas is fast approaching and Mom wants her children, maybe too young to understand—maybe old enough to go through their own tragic heartbreak—still to have a good Christmas. But she can’t stop crying and wailing and the doctor has given her something to help her sleep and relax until she can grasp the magnitude of this nightmare that isn’t going away.

So friends and family pitch in and set up the Christmas tree, which is heavy laden with presents that first Christmas without him. But nothing fills the emptiness that permeates their home. The presents don’t fill the empty chair at the breakfast table Christmas morning, or the presents he’s not opening, or the prayer he’s not saying before meals, or the toys he’s not putting together, or the presents he didn’t give her, or his stocking that hangs empty on the mantel, and the fire he’s not stoking.

10 Practical Ways to Care for Widows and Fatherless Children this Christmas

Take her children’s Christmas lists, clothes sizes, and do her Christmas shopping, then wrap all her presents. Assure her that only her children need gifts this year. No one else expects or needs anything from her.
If she’s bought presents, wrap them for her.
If she’s already bought presents for her deceased husband, offer to return them for her.
If she’s not going to be with family Christmas Eve or morning, pack up your family and bring your Christmas to her house. Then if she needs to go in her bedroom and cry, her children won’t be opening their presents or crying alone.
Don’t just drop meals off, stay and have the meal with her and the kids.
During Christmas vacation, take her kids on play dates so she can have time alone to cry without fear of upsetting the kids.
Know when her extended family is leaving and line up people from church to stop by and bring meals, pray, comfort her, and see how she and the kids are doing.
Don’t forget older widows. Don’t think that because her husband was elderly that the pain is any less. She loved her husband for many years and they had blended into one heartbeat. Watch for signs of her declining or possibly losing a will to live.
If you don’t have one already, start a support group in your church for widows and one for children who have lost their father. This isn’t just a holiday need, it’s a daily need.
It may be difficult for her to see all the “couples” at church. Invite her to sit with your family during Christmas programs and every Sunday. If you notice she’s not coming to church, pick up the kids, bring them to church, and ask the pastor to stop and visit her. She may be mad at God. Don’t let her stay mad. Shower her with God’s love, and help her understand that God is crying over the loss of her husband too.

**Her Husband Will Never Be Home for Christmas or Anytime Again!**

[Tweet “Don’t forget about the widow, or the widow and her children, after the first Christmas.”]

Don’t forget about the widow, or the widow and her children, after the first Christmas. Every Christmas will be hard. She’ll always have to lug the Christmas tree home, set it up by herself, try and get the outside lights up for the kids, and make Christmas merry even though her heart is aching. His chair will still be empty, and his side of the bed will still be cold. He was the spiritual leader of the home, and now she’ll have to fill that role as both mother and father to their children.

[Tweet “Don’t expect a widow of any age to “get better” soon.”]

Don’t expect a widow of any age to “get better” soon. Time will lessen the acute pain, but she’ll always have a aching hole in her heart, so don’t forget her after a month. Remember, she’s still a widow and her children are still fatherless, and she will need help with all the things her husband used to do around the house and her children will need godly male role models in their lives.

The widow will always need the love, support, help, kindness, and prayers of her family, friends, and church family not just at Christmas, but year round.

How do I know what a widow or fatherless child would need? Because my mother was that 32 year-old widow, I was the 10 year-old little girl, and my sister was four when my father, a California Highway Patrolman, was shot with his own gun and murdered one night while on duty on October 8. We went through his first birthday a week later, October 17, and I still remember going with my mother to Penny’s to return the leather jacket she had bought for his birthday. The next month came the first Thanksgiving . . . then the first Christmas without him.

These past few months in the news, we’ve watched policemen gunned down in their cars and each one of those men represented a mother or widow and children who will have that “first Christmas without him.” Or if you live near a military base, there are doubtless widows and fatherless children in your community. Pray for them, and if you live near any of them or go to their churches . . . do something for those families in the name of the Lord. That would be the best gift Jesus would have you give this Christmas. It was the best gift people gave to us.

[Tweet “You know a widow, a fatherless child, a single mom, a shut-in who needs to see the love of Jesus lived out tangibly. “]

Sing to God, sing in praise of his name,
extol him who rides on the clouds;
rejoice before him—his name is the Lord.

A father to the fatherless, a defender of widows,
is God in his holy dwelling.

God sets the lonely in families . . . . Psalm 68:4-6

camp-picture-with-arrow2

I know this was a sobering post to start the Christmas season, but you all know a widow, a fatherless child, a single mom, a shut-in who needs to see the love of Jesus lived out tangibly. I became a Christian because a year after my father’s death, someone at the camp in the picture above asked me:

“We know you’ve lost your earthly father, but would you like to know a heavenly Father who will never leave or forsake you?” I said, “Oh, Yes,” and my life has never been the same.

You could give that gift to some fatherless child this Christmas too.

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Can you read the name of the photographer’s sign in front of me in the picture?

December 5, 2016

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Conquering “Shoulditis”

Becky Kopitzke is a fellow mentor mom over at The MOM Initiative with a new book I thought you would all enjoy learning about. Her topic in this blog is “shoulditis,” and I know we all suffer from shoulda, coulda, why didn’t I?, why aren’t I as good?, . . . we’ve all been there. Becky reminds us that God made each of us unique with our own gifts and talents and all He expects is that we use them to His glory!

Enjoy this post by Becky:

Have you heard of a common debilitating condition infecting women today? It’s called “shoulditis”—otherwise known as I should do that disease. I’ve got it. You probably do, too. Symptoms flare up under the most ordinary circumstances.

When my friend calls to say she’s taking a Zumba class, I think of how long it’s been since my sneakers hit the gym, and my own voice whispers in my head, I should do that.

When I scroll through Pinterest and see a dozen photos of cutesy craft projects other moms created with their children, I’m deflated. I should do that.

When my parenting magazine plugs a recipe for brownies using hidden carrot puree, I think of the Duncan Hines box stashed in my cupboard. Carrots are way healthier. I should do that.

Vacation plans. Extreme couponing. Colon-cleansing diets. Reading lists, scrapbooks, chore charts, and hand-sewn purses. Monkey-face pancakes, are you kidding me? She does it! I should do it, too!

But I can’t do everything, can I?

[Tweet “You can’t do everything! And you shouldn’t.”]

Can you?

And that is the pain of shoulditis. It assumes we are supposed to be someone else—or a hundred someone elses. Our spirits inflame with an impossible itch to be as clever, resourceful, energetic, artsy, and self-disciplined as those other women.

Reality check. They can’t do everything, either.

We all have our own things—our talents, interests, commitments, priorities. Yours aren’t better than mine, and mine aren’t better than yours. They’re just different.

[Tweet “God is fantastically creative, and He gave us each a unique blend of gifts. “]

Why? Because God is fantastically creative, and He gave us each a unique blend of gifts. Trying to do it all is a waste of time. It’s like saying God got it wrong. On the flip side, doing what He created us to do—that’s worship.

[Tweet “Doing what God created us to do—that’s worship.”]

“There are different kinds of spiritual gifts, but the same Spirit is the source of them all. There are different kinds of service, but we serve the same Lord. God works in different ways, but it is the same God who does the work in all of us” (1 Corinthians 12:4–6 NLT).

So. Let’s slap some salve on that shoulditis, shall we? (Say that five times fast.)

The antidote is: I should not do that.

When the neighbors rent a mega bounce house for their son’s birthday party, I will tell myself, I should not do that. My children have winter birthdays, anyway. We can’t fit a bounce house in the kitchen.

When my friend runs a half marathon—good for her! But I should not do that. Stroller walks are more my pace.

When that sweet lady in the church choir raves about her make-ahead freezer meals, I definitely should not do that. This momma prefers to spend Sunday afternoon playing Scrabble with the kids. I will grab some frozen chicken patties from the supermarket and call them dinner.

So let’s all agree—you should do what you do, and I should do what I do, and together we will create a supportive, well-rounded community of women who love what they do and really can do it all—collectively.

“All of you together are Christ’s body, and each of you is a part of it” (1 Corinthians 12:27 NLT).

This post contains an excerpt from The SuperMom Myth: Conquering the Dirty Villains of Motherhood (Shiloh Run Press) by Becky Kopitzke. Used by permission.

# # #

About the book

Does your journey through motherhood look different from what you imagined?

Do you struggle to measure up to your own standards?

Do you sometimes wish you could be like that other mom who seems to have it all together?

You are not alone.

The Supermom Myth: Conquering the Dirty Villains of Motherhood, a new book by Christian mom blogger Becky Kopitzke, is designed to encourage imperfect moms to laugh at ourselves, forgive ourselves, and discover the beautiful moms God created within. Delivered with down-to-earth humor and carefully applied biblical insight, The SuperMom Myth explores eight personified “dirty villains” of motherhood, including The Grouch on the Couch (Anger), Worry Woman (Fear), The Calendar Queen (Busyness), and more. Throughout this delightful read for every mom, Kopitzke offers a gentle reminder to rest in the super power of our grace-filled God.

Visit www.TheSuperMomMyth.com for more information, including trailer videos, reviews, and details on where to buy copies for yourself and your mom friends.

About the author

Becky Kopitzke is the author of The SuperMom Myth: Conquering the Dirty Villains of Motherhood (Shiloh Run Press). As a writer, speaker, singer, dreamer, lunch packer, snowman builder and recovering perfectionist, Becky believes parenting is one of God’s greatest tools for building our faith, character, and strength—and it’s not always pretty.

On her devotional blog, beckykopitzke.com, she offers weekly encouragement for fellow imperfect moms, pointing our weaknesses, blessings, and victories to God.

Becky lives messily ever after with her loving husband and their two young daughters in northeast Wisconsin, where a pink indoor trampoline fills half the once formal living room. Connect with Becky on Facebook, Pinterest, and Instagram.

If you received this blog by email, comment here.

February 1, 2016

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How to Reach Out to a Young Mom

Today’s guest post is by Arlene Pellicane, author of 31 Days to Becoming a Happy Mom. As I read Arlene’s post today, I thought back about the young mother who just moved into our community and is trying so hard to make friends. I invited her to bring her three kids over to play with my grandkids this week and they had several fun play dates, including time at the pool. Then at church this morning I told another young mom who also lives in our “mountain community” about our new neighbor. I suggested I get these two moms together to meet for coffee and she was all for it. Then I read, the following post and realized I’d been doing exactly what Arlene is talking about here … and I, of course, am not a young mom … I’m a Grammie who God can use to encourage and mentor younger moms.

I’m also honored that some of my own story is in Arlene’s new book and she’s offering a free copy to one of you. So just leave a comment on the blog to enter the drawing. Be sure you check the box to receive email responses to the blog or include your email address so I can let you know if you’re the winner.

Guest Post by Arlene Pellicane

Whether you are an introvert, extrovert, or a mix in-between like me, everyone needs to be in some kind of community. I know many women who left the workforce to become a mom, only to find the days eerily lonely. Motherhood can be a lonely profession. When you meet a new mom, take a moment to ask a few questions. You might be the bridge between that lonely mom and another woman who may share common interests.

[Tweet “Motherhood can be a lonely profession. “]

You Can Be the Difference

Recently I was at a birthday party for one of my child’s classmates. A nicely dressed woman came my way and said, “I don’t know if you remember me, but I met you years ago at the library. You told me about a mom’s group. I wanted to let you know I joined and it made a huge difference to me and I wanted to thank you.”

After she told the story, I did remember striking up that conversation during a “mommy and me” reading time. She was a new mom looking for support and I pointed her to a local group for moms. She acted on the suggestion and gained a solid group of new friends as a result.

You could be the difference for a lonely woman around you. Look around in your circles. Is there a mom who could use a friend? Are there two people in your life who you could connect because they have common interests or common stages of life?

[Tweet “You don’t have to set up an elaborate meal at your home to show someone hospitality. “]

Don’t be afraid to invite a young mom to coffee. She’ll be honored at the invitation. You don’t have to set up an elaborate meal at your home to show someone hospitality. Just spend less than $10 at a coffeehouse and one hour of your time. That could make a huge difference in the heart of a struggling mom.

Hug a Friend in Real Life

[Tweet “But if we’re not careful, we can think social media serves all our needs for community. Yet nothing replaces a hug from a friend.”]

The advent of social media allows you to look at photos of friends and family members in faraway places. But if we’re not careful, we can think social media serves all our needs for community. Yet nothing replaces a hug from a friend. Hugging a friend or laughing out loud with someone is a natural way to fight stress and anxiety. Social media can meet a need in our lives for connection to a degree, but it can’t replace physically meeting other moms who understand your life. In my book, 31 Days to Becoming a Happy Mom, my friend, Laura Petherbridge, the Smart Step-Mom, gives this advice:

One of the most encouraging things I can say to a step mom who’s feeling like a failure or a total disappointment as a stepmom, is God created us for community. He created us for community with people in similar circumstances. I cannot encourage a stepmom enough to get into some type of a group or event with other stepmoms who understand her pain and loss. At the stepmom retreats I lead, the number one thing moms tell me is I finally feel like I am not alone anymore. I finally feel like I am not the wicked stepmother. Now I have one or two sisters who get it. When they are up, they can help me and vice versa. It’s not commiserating; it’s not about bashing the biological mom or stepkids. It’s getting with a strong group of stepmoms who want their marriage to be strong and thriving and encouraging each other. There is nothing I have discovered that takes the place of that.

Laura’s counsel about being in community with like-minded moms rings true, whether you’re a stepmom or not. And when reaching out to moms, remember the advice of Dale Carnegie, “You can make more friends in two months by becoming interested in other people than you can in two years by trying to get other people interested in you.”

By the way, you may be a young mom yourself who can reach out to a mom who is the same age, but who has younger children.

What’s something you have done to reach out to a mom? What worked? What didn’t?

Giveaway book: 31 Days to Becoming a Happy Mom. Just leave a comment on the blog to enter the drawing. Be sure to include your email address or check the box to receive email notices from the blog so you’ll know if you are a winner.

Arlene Pellicane is a speaker and author of 31 Days to Becoming a Happy Mom and 31 Days to a Happy Husband. She is also the co-author of Growing Up Social: Raising Relational Kids in a Screen-Driven World (with Gary Chapman). She has been a featured guest on the Today Show, Fox & Friends, Focus on the Family, FamilyLife Today, The 700 Club, and Turning Point with Dr. David Jeremiah.

Arlene lives in the San Diego area with her husband James and their three children.

To learn more and for free family resources such as a monthly Happy Home podcast, visit www.ArlenePellicane.com

You’ll also enjoy this short video created by Arlene Pellicane and her sweet children.https://youtu.be/SV2ewzM1THE

August 3, 2015

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Who’s Behind The War on Women?

The Battleground of Abortion

The Battleground of Genders

The Battleground of Motherhood

What’s a Woman to Do?

Never Poke A Mama Bear

Get Involved!

Masks and Vaccinations for Children

Virtual Grandparents’ Day of Prayer!

What Is the Need?

WHAT IS A “VIRTUAL GRANDPARENTS’ DAY OF PRAYER”?

What Is God’s Response to ‘Ok Boomer’?

Being a Boomer Was Special!

How Can Christians Bridge the OK Boomer Generation Gaps?

If You’re Pro-life, You’re Pro-Woman!

What If You’ve Had an Abortion or Know Someone Who Has?

Life Empowers: Pro-Life is Pro-Woman

Abortion is the ultimate exploitation of women.

What Can We Do?

Our Family’s Adoption Story

What Kind of Person Kills a Newborn Baby?

Are You The Woman Today You Want Your Daughter to Become?

The Mothering Season

Who Will Care for the Widows and Fatherless this Christmas?

The First Christmas Without Him

10 Practical Ways to Care for Widows and Fatherless Children this Christmas

**Her Husband Will Never Be Home for Christmas or Anytime Again!**

Conquering “Shoulditis”

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The Battleground of Abortion

The Battleground of Genders

The Battleground of Motherhood

What’s a Woman to Do?

Get Involved!

Masks and Vaccinations for Children

What Is the Need?

WHAT IS A “VIRTUAL GRANDPARENTS’ DAY OF PRAYER”?

Being a Boomer Was Special!

How Can Christians Bridge the OK Boomer Generation Gaps?

What If You’ve Had an Abortion or Know Someone Who Has?

Life Empowers: Pro-Life is Pro-Woman

Abortion is the ultimate exploitation of women.

What Can We Do?

Our Family’s Adoption Story

The Mothering Season

The First Christmas Without Him

10 Practical Ways to Care for Widows and Fatherless Children this Christmas

Her Husband Will Never Be Home for Christmas or Anytime Again!

Guest Post by Arlene Pellicane

You Can Be the Difference

Hug a Friend in Real Life

Search This Site

Receive My Weekly Blog

Blog Archives

Grab and Share My Button

Golden Scrolls Finalist

BibleGateway

Categories

Latest from My Weekly Blog

Subscribe by Email to my Blog

Subscribe to Our Weekly Blog

Contact Janet

Topics of Interest

Meta

**Her Husband Will Never Be Home for Christmas or Anytime Again!**