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Who Is Your Neighbor? Anyone Who Needs Your Help!

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Who's Your neighbor? Someone Who Needs TP!

Saturday morning, my daughter posted on Facebook that her family of five was low on toilet paper. She voiced frustration with those hoarding this personal necessity since her husband had gone to several stores and only came home with napkins!

Immediately, she started receiving comments from Facebook friends ready to spare some of their supply and bring her family TP! Then another friend out shopping found a family size package at a store and purchased it for her.

Who's Your neighbor? Someone Who needs TP!

After seeing pictures of empty grocery store shelves, especially of toilet paper, it warmed my heart, and hers, to know she had so many generous friends, who had probably weathered the crowds to get their own precious stash and were ready to step in and help my daughter’s family.

My daughter’s friends understood: For the entire law is fulfilled in keeping this one command: “Love your neighbor as yourself.” Galatians 5:14

We also have dear friends who have braved COSTCO and ask what we need them to pick up for us. I’m sure you have friends like this too, and I hope you’ve also had the blessing of being that kind of friend to someone else in need.

I do wonder if shoppers with overflowing shopping carts are stockpiling in their garages and basements or are they sharing with an elderly or shut-in neighbor, friend, or relative? Or maybe giving to someone who can’t afford to make bulk purchases? I hope so!

Who Is Your Neighbor? Someone Who Needs TP!

Give generously to the poor, not grudgingly, for the Lord your God will bless you in everything you do.—Deuteronomy 15:10 NLT

I’m not minimizing the need to be prepared, but government advice is recommending food and supplies for two weeks, not two years!

Greed Leads to Destruction: Generosity Leads to Refreshment

A generous person will prosper; whoever refreshes others will be refreshed.—Proverbs 11:25

Jesus told a parable about a hoarder who didn’t share with his neighbors!

13 Then someone called from the crowd, “Teacher, please tell my brother to divide our father’s estate with me.”

14 Jesus replied, “Friend, who made me a judge over you to decide such things as that?” 15 Then he said, “Beware! Guard against every kind of greed. Life is not measured by how much you own.”

16 Then he told them a story: “A rich man had a fertile farm that produced fine crops. 17 He said to himself, ‘What should I do? I don’t have room for all my crops.’ 18 Then he said, ‘I know! I’ll tear down my barns and build bigger ones. Then I’ll have room enough to store all my wheat and other goods. 19 And I’ll sit back and say to myself, “My friend, you have enough stored away for years to come. Now take it easy! Eat, drink, and be merry!”’

20 “But God said to him, ‘You fool! You will die this very night. Then who will get everything you worked for?’

21 “Yes, a person is a fool to store up earthly wealth but not have a rich relationship with God.”

Jesus went on to tell his disciples a message about money, possessions, pandemic fear, and panic-buying we’re watching today.

22 Then, turning to his disciples, Jesus said, “That is why I tell you not to worry about everyday life—whether you have enough food to eat or enough clothes to wear. 23 For life is more than food, and your body more than clothing. 24 Look at the ravens. They don’t plant or harvest or store food in barns, for God feeds them. And you are far more valuable to him than any birds! 25 Can all your worries add a single moment to your life? 26 And if worry can’t accomplish a little thing like that, what’s the use of worrying over bigger things?

27 “Look at the lilies and how they grow. They don’t work or make their clothing, yet Solomon in all his glory was not dressed as beautifully as they are. 28 And if God cares so wonderfully for flowers that are here today and thrown into the fire tomorrow, he will certainly care for you. Why do you have so little faith?

29 “And don’t be concerned about what to eat and what to drink. Don’t worry about such things. 30 These things dominate the thoughts of unbelievers all over the world, but your Father already knows your needs. 31 Seek the Kingdom of God above all else, and he will give you everything you need.

32 “So don’t be afraid, little flock. For it gives your Father great happiness to give you the Kingdom.—Luke 12:13-32

Church Services Canceled

Many churches canceled their services this past weekend until further notice. There are online or television services you can watch, but keeping everything in perspective, there are more people packed into a COSTCO or Walmart than are in most church services. Yet, no one seems to be worried about those numbers of people.

I understand the restriction on groups gathering, but I still have to wonder why shopping together is fine but praying together is a danger.

My husband and I are both in the over 60 group the doctors warn are more susceptible to this virus. We’re definitely taking precautions, but we’re grateful for President Trump’s understanding of the power of prayer.

 “It’s my great honor to declare Sunday, March 15, as a National Day of Prayer. We are a Country that, throughout our history, has looked to God for protection and strength in times like these…. “No matter where you may be, I encourage you to turn towards prayer in an act of faith. Together, we will easily PREVAIL!” President Trump

What I Hope Each Christian is Doing to Combat Fear, Uncertainty, and Scarcity!

1. Shop for everyone you know who is financially restricted, housebound, or elderly. Take care of their needs.

Now that I am old and gray,
    do not abandon me, O God.
Let me proclaim your power to this new generation,
    your mighty miracles to all who come after me.—Ps. 71:18 NLT

2. If you’ve overbought for your family, share with those around you who weren’t as fortunate.

And do not forget to do good and to share with others, for with such sacrifices God is pleased. —Heb. 13:16

3. Pray for the Coronavirus task force, President Trump, Vice President Pence, healing for the sick, medical personnel, hospital staff, and a vaccine . . . whatever God puts on your mind and heart.

Never stop praying!—1 Thess. 5:17

4. Share Jesus with those who are fearful.

17 And as we live in God, our love grows more perfect. So we will not be afraid on the day of judgment, but we can face him with confidence because we live like Jesus here in this world.

18 Such love has no fear, because perfect love expels all fear. If we are afraid, it is for fear of punishment, and this shows that we have not fully experienced his perfect love. 19 We love each other[a] because he loved us first.—1 John 4:17-19 NLT

Who Is Your Neighbor?

25 One day an expert in religious law stood up to test Jesus by asking him this question: “Teacher, what should I do to inherit eternal life?”

26 Jesus replied, “What does the law of Moses say? How do you read it?”

27 The man answered, “‘You must love the Lord your God with all your heart, all your soul, all your strength, and all your mind.’ And, ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’”[a]

28 “Right!” Jesus told him. “Do this and you will live!”

29 The man wanted to justify his actions, so he asked Jesus, “And who is my neighbor?”

Then Jesus told the story of the Jewish man attacked by bandits and left to die. A priest and Temple assistant came by and each walked to the other side of the road. Next, a Samaritan came by who bandaged up the injured man, took him to an inn, and paid the innkeeper to take care of him assuring that he would be back for him and pay the remaining bill.

36 “Now which of these three would you say was a neighbor to the man who was attacked by bandits?” Jesus asked.

37 The man replied, “The one who showed him mercy.”

Then Jesus said, “Yes, now go and do the same.” Luke 25-37 NLT

Let’s you and I go and do the same!

Show mercy, generosity, kindness, and love to our neighbors.

If you haven’t read my blogs the last two weeks:

Pray: Don’t Panic
Headlines Are Designed to Generate Fear: God Says, “Fear Not!”

March 16, 2020
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Rejection Tests Our Courage

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It's hard staying brave in rejection

Rejection cuts like a knife, straight to the heart of our self-confidence and self-worth. Many of us can remember feeling insecure in high school, desperately wanting to be popular and accepted. Many girls who feel rejected or unloved by their dads also feel unlovable and don’t value their own dignity or respect their bodies. If Daddy doesn’t love them, then who will? They might turn to self-destruction or settling for less than they deserve because of their hunger for love from a man.

Other women rejected or dismissed by a male decide all men are bad and try to find solace in promiscuity or even same-sex relationships, to no avail.

A sinful life never soothes a hurting heart.

[Tweet “A sinful life never soothes a hurting heart.”]

Rejection comes in many forms—not just from men. Jobs. Parents. Children. Schools. Relationships. Friendships. Sports. Publishers. Auditions. Contests. Infertility. You weren’t selected, accepted, loved, or good enough.

Rejection can seem like failure and a justification to quit. Or we can view rejection as an opportunity to put our brave on and try again.

Life is often unfair. Sometimes others exclude us or treat us unjustly. We find ourselves in circumstances we can’t control or change. Rejection hurts and we’re angry, maybe even with God. We think God has rejected us when he doesn’t answer our prayers the way we want or expect.

[Tweet “God is our only sure source of strength and courage to rally and carry on with confidence and composure.”]

But soon we realize God is our only sure source of strength and courage to rally and carry on with confidence and composure. Even when we don’t feel his presence, our faith assures us of the truth that we are never alone. God has promised never to leave or forsake us, even when others fail us or abandon us.

So we pick ourselves up and bravely move forward, choosing to not let rejection define us or retaliation confine us.

Rejection or Curiosity?

Other times what we perceive as rejection is just curiosity. Maybe we’re a little different from others and they’re just trying to figure us out. Sometimes we can overcome our feelings of inferiority or insecurity by reaching out to others, even when it isn’t comfortable. Sometimes it works, and sometimes it doesn’t. It’s always worth a try.

When my husband and I moved from Orange County, California, to the rural mountains of Idaho, I felt scrutinized and rejected. I was from California. I dressed differently. I’m an author and speaker, not a canner or camper. We came from a mega-church to a small church and I didn’t always know the old hymns, but I learned them. I didn’t “pack.” In short, I wasn’t a mountain woman and probably never will become one.

I felt perceived stares and disapproval, but I was here to stay, so I tried not to read into what might be behind the once-overs and whispers. I reached out, smiled, hugged, participated, talked, made new friends, and loved on them. I still don’t pack or make jelly or can, but I’ve met people who take me as I am.

I love one-time game show host Wink Martindale’s quote: “Rejection is just another point of view.”

God Won’t Reject You!

[Tweet “Remember, when others reject you, God accepts you.”]

Remember, when others reject you, God accepts you. Rejection says more about the other person than it does about you.

Rejection doesn’t define you; it refines you.

[Tweet “Rejection doesn’t define you; it refines you.”]

Praise be to God, who has not rejected my prayer or withheld his love from me! Psalm 66:20

What lessons has God taught you through actual or perceived rejection?

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Everyday Brave is available on Amazon, Christianbook.com, BarnesandNoble.com and signed at my website. 

September 30, 2019
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Grandparents Uniting in Prayer on Grandparents’ Day  

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Today’s guest blogger is my dear friend and fellow author, Lillian Penner, the author of Grandparenting with a Purpose: Effective Ways to Pray for Your Grandchildren and national co-director for Christian Grandparenting Network’s prayer ministry. The 2018 Grandparent’s Day is coming up September 9! Lillian has ideas and suggestions for how your church can participate in promoting and honoring grandparents and grandchildren in your church. Whether or not you’re a grandparent or parent, every church has grandparents and grandchildren. We all need to be in prayer for families and children facing today’s culture.

Grandparents Are Uniting in Prayer on Grandparents Day of Prayer

Grandparents Day of Prayer September 9, 2018

Grandparents’ Day was designated, by a Senate proclamation signed by President Jimmy Carter in 1978, to be observed the second Sunday in September. The mission of Christian Grandparenting Network is to promote effective grandparenting, with the aim of helping our grandchildren to know and follow Christ wholeheartedly. That is why Christian Grandparenting Network is asking grandparents all over the world to join in prayer for their grandchildren and the parents of their grandchildren on, Sunday, September 9 of this year, making it a Grandparents’ Day of Prayer.

[Tweet “The mission of Christian Grandparenting Network is to promote effective grandparenting, with the aim of helping our grandchildren to know and follow Christ wholeheartedly.”]

[Tweet “Christian Grandparenting Network is joining in prayer with grandparents and churches on Sept. 9,  for a Grandparents’ Day of Prayer.”]

It’s not easy for our grandchildren to navigate in a world hostile to truth in this post-Christian culture. Satan is relentless in his aggressive attack to desensitize our children to truth and righteousness. The enemy wants to disintegrate and divide our families, rendering them chaotic, restless, and unfruitful. Let’s not let the enemy distract us or dull our desires to pray for our grandchildren and their parents intentionally.

[Tweet “Let’s not let the enemy distract us or dull our desires to pray for our grandchildren and their parents intentionally.”]

We are in a spiritual battle requiring spiritual weapons. Prayer is our best weapon to defeat the enemy. It’s our place as grandparents to get on our knees, humble ourselves, seek God’s face, repent of our sin, and intercede for our nations, our children, and grandchildren. Then having done all, we stand firm in our faith that God has heard and will answer our prayers according to His will.

[Tweet “We are in a spiritual battle requiring spiritual weapons. Prayer is our best weapon to defeat the enemy.”]

“Do not be afraid or discouraged . . . . For the battle is not yours but Gods.” II Chronicles 20:15

Our grandchildren and their parents not only need our support, but they also need our earnest prayers. They need our united prayer for our hopes and dreams for the next generation to be realized. Jesus declared, “Again I say to you, that if two believers on earth agree [that is, are of one mind, in harmony] about anything that they ask [within the will of God], it will be done for them by My Father in heaven. For where two or three are gathered in My name [meeting as My followers], I am there among them” (Matt. 18:19-20).

We believe praying grandparents can win the battle for the hearts and minds of our precious grandchildren and their parents. Many years ago, when the Israelites’ lives were threatened physically, Esther stood in the gap for her people. Today, grandparents can stand in the gap for their grandchildren and their parents as their spiritual lives are threatened.

Christian Grandparenting Network (CGN) would like to invite all praying grandparents to come before God’s throne of grace, to obtain mercy and find grace in our time of need for our grandchildren and their parents. In the past, united prayer has always bridged the gap between a great need and a great awakening! We hope that thousands of churches and groups around the world will participate in this intentional day of prayer on behalf of the next generation.

This event could be held in your church, in your home, in a retirement complex, or any meeting location of your choice. CGN will provide step-by-step guidelines, resources, and online tools to help you create a successful event that will engage grandparents in prayer.

You may want to host a prayer breakfast or a luncheon following your morning worship. Or you may want to offer an afternoon tea or evening dessert in your home. Perhaps your minister is willing to address the importance of praying grandparents and set aside a particular prayer time during the worship service. The possibilities are endless. It is imperative; no matter the format, that grandparents gather to pray for their grandchildren.

Larry Fowler, the Founder and Executive Director for Legacy Coalition writes,

The Legacy Coalition is honored to join the Christian Grandparenting Network in promoting Grandparents Day 2018 as a day devoted to praying for grandchildren.  We strongly recommend that in our churches and in our homes, we take this day to encourage grandparents to intentionally exercise this powerful spiritual discipline. We commend CGN for their leadership in encouraging grandparents everywhere to participate in the Grandparents’ Day of Prayer, and we will be enthusiastically supporting their efforts.

We’re looking for grandparents who believe in the power of prayer to participate in this event. Will you help us call grandparents to join in prayer on September 9th?

To learn more and indicate participation in the movement, or organize a time of grandparents praying, go to our website, http://www.grandparentsdayofprayer.com. You will see endorsements, testimonials, promotional materials, and free downloads.

For additional information, contact Grandparents’ Day of Prayer, Coordinator, Lillian Penner, at [email protected].

Lillian Penner is the Chairman of National Grandparents 'Day

Lillian Penner

Lillian Penner is the author of Grandparenting with a Purpose: Effective Ways to Pray for Your Grandchildren and national co-director for Christian Grandparenting Network’s prayer ministry. An avid blogger, Lillian breaks into smiles if you ask about her 12 grandchildren and four great-grandchildren. She and her husband, John, live in Portland, Oregon, where they are active in church ministries.

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July 2, 2018
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Are Today’s Churches Discouraging Reading the Bible?

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How Can a Word Change Your Life?, Reading God's Word will change your life.

At the beginning of the sermon, a Bible church pastor said to raise your hand if you needed a Bible and you could keep it if you didn’t have one. No one raised his or her hand.

Every sermon Scripture was in a printed handout in the church bulletin, as well as on the screens at the front of the church. Why would anyone need a Bible?

[Tweet “Congregants are spoon-fed Scriptures with no reason to bring their Bibles to church!”]

This is becoming the norm in churches. Congregants are spoon-fed Scriptures with no reason to bring their Bibles to church!

  • How many make a note somewhere when a particular Scripture pierces their heart?
  • How many will remember the Scriptures flashing up on a screen?
  • How many will throw away the bulletin handout when they get home?
  • How many will go back and review and study the Scriptures the pastor chose for his sermon?
  • How many open their Bibles during the week?
  • How many know where the books of the Bible are located?

Can churches still be called “Bible churches” when no one opens a Bible, even the pastor?

[Tweet “Can churches still be called “Bible churches” when no one opens a Bible, even the pastor?”]

I’m sure many will counter that with tablets, IPads, and smart phones, the Scriptures are available online. What if a church doesn’t have internet service? And even if they did, I seldom see congregants interacting and taking notes on their electronic devices like you can do with a hard copy Bible.

Recently, I was told the next generation only wants to use electronic Bibles. “What if they don’t know where Habakkuk is?” I was asked. “In ‘search,’ it’s easy to find on an electronic Bible.”

This underscores my point. The next generation will not know how to find Habakkuk in a Bible because they’re not looking at the complete Bible on an electronic device. That’s like looking at one line in a book you’re reading, but never read the entire book. Every Bible has a Table of Contents.

[Tweet “The next generation will not know how to find Habakkuk, or any book of the Bible, because they’re not looking at the complete Bible.”]

My counter to what the next generation wants: What are we told to do in the Bible? Give them just what they want, the way they want it? Or are we to mentor them using God’s Word and teach them the value of knowing their Bible, God’s Word, and how to use it for their own personal relationship with the Lord.

[Tweet “We’re to mentor using God’s Word and teach the next generation the value of knowing their Bible”]

“When we want to find God’s will, it is essential that we know our Bible. After all, God will never lead one of His followers to do anything that is contrary to the Scriptures. That’s one reason Paul exhorted us believers to “let the word of Christ dwell in you richly in all wisdom” (Colossians 3:16). When we know Christ, are being led by His Spirit, and are abiding in His Word, we will be more sensitive to God’s guidance in our life. “Show me Your ways, O Lord; Teach me Your paths” (Psalm 25:4). (The Believer’s Code, O. S. Hawkins, April 3).

There is absolutely a place for electronic Bibles for reaching those doing online studies or aren’t in an area where they can obtain a Bible, but reading and interacting with God’s Word is about a relationship, not research. It’s not just randomly looking up a Scripture; it’s interacting and interfacing with the entire Bible. If you have a close relationship with someone, would you be satisfied with one or two lines on social media, or would you want to get to know them personally?

[Tweet “Knowing your Bible isn’t just randomly looking up a Scripture; it’s interacting and interfacing with the entire Bible”]

I realize it’s important to reach the younger generation where they’re at, and some might accept Christ without a Bible in their hand because the Holy Spirit does not send out the Word of God void (Isaiah 55:11). But what about those of us called to mentor them into maturity in their faith? Shouldn’t we help them get to know their Bible? Help them learn how to go to God’s Word in context as a guide for living the Christian life so they can say, “I have hidden your word in my heart that I might not sin against you” (Psalm 119:11).

Let’s never portray the Bible as intimidating, but proclaim the Bible as inspiring!

[Tweet “Never portray the Bible as intimidating, proclaim the Bible as inspiring!”]

A note to parents: If you only read your Bible on an electronic device, how do your children know you’re not checking email, social media, or playing a game?

Taking our precious Bibles to church, looking up Scriptures, writing notes in our Bible, reading our Bibles . . .  sets a godly role model for those watching us, as we grow in our maturity and relationship with the Lord.

[Tweet “I don’t see mature believers with their Bibles in church or even using an electronic Bible.”]

Honestly, I often don’t see mature believers with their Bibles in church or even using an electronic Bible. What kind of example does that set? We never reach a place in our faith, where we know it all. God’s Word is new every morning and every reading.

I was recently at the Billy Graham library where his Bibles were on display with all his notes in the margins. A legacy of interaction with the Word of God, and with God.

Billy Graham my Mentor with his Beloved Bible

If we want to grow in our love for the Lord, we must draw near to Him through His Word. As we learn to know Him intimately, our love will increase and we’ll desire to obey. Unless we invest in Scripture, our fervor for the Lord will fall short of what it could be.

And if you ever feel disappointed that your love for Christ seems small, open the Word of God and obey whatever He says, He will abide with you and disclose Himself, thereby increasing your capacity to love and know Him more. Dr. Charles Stanley, In Touch Magazine, April 3, 2018 (emphasis added).

I’m fortunate to attend a church where people still bring their Bibles. The pastor puts the Scripture reference in the handout notes, but not the Scripture. He encourages everyone to look them up, and he waits to give them a chance. What a blessing to hear the pages of Bibles turning. What joy this must bring to the Lord. Yes, the Scriptures are also on the screens and some don’t look up the Scriptures in a Bible.

My point: If you want to hear God, you need to engage with Him through a vital way He communicates, His Word, the Holy Bible.

[Tweet “If you want God to speak, you need to engage with Him through His Word!”]

Flashing Scriptures on a screen, reading on an electronic device, or printing them in a handout that often gets tossed, will never replace knowing the written Word of God.

A revealing of Jesus, the Messiah. God gave it to make plain to his servants what is about to happen. He published and delivered it by Angel to his servant John. And John told everything he saw: God’s Word— the witness of Jesus Christ!

3 How blessed the reader! How blessed the hearers and keepers of these oracle words, all the words written in this book!

Time is just about up. Revelation 1:1-3 The Message

After you pray and ask God what He thinks, let me know what He says to you.

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April 9, 2018
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Is Your Church a Hugging Church?

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I started the Woman to Woman Mentoring Ministry at Saddleback Church in Lake Forest, California, which as Pastor Rick Warren describes . . . “We’re a hugging church.” So I knew that women attending one of our Woman to Woman Mentoring Orientation Coffees would need welcoming from a “Greeter/Hugger” at the front door.

Some churches starting the Woman to Woman Mentoring Ministry question the need for a Greeter/Hugger, until they have an experience similar to the church who shared this story with me:

A helper offered to be the Greeter/Hugger at our Orientation Coffee, but she couldn’t hug a stranger so she would shake hands. We aren’t a hugging church, but since we were following your Woman to Woman Mentoring Ministry Coordinator’s Guide where you stress the importance of having a Greeter/Hugger, we decided we would have her help in another area and find someone who would hug the women as they arrived. Then during the sharing time, one woman said she was a newlywed, and shortly after their wedding, her husband deployed overseas. The hug she received from the Greeter/Hugger was her first hug in eighteen months, and that hug assured her the mentoring ministry was just where the Lord wanted her. After the Coffee, the helper who said she couldn’t hug strangers, said she would be the Greeter/Hugger at our next Orientation Coffee.

How Did Church Members Greet Each Other in Jesus’s Day?

[Tweet “God’s design for the church was for believers to be family.”]

God’s design for the church was for believers to be family. Jesus made that clear in Mark 3:31-35:

Then Jesus’ mother and brothers arrived. Standing outside, they sent someone in to call him. A crowd was sitting around him, and they told him, “Your mother and brothers are outside looking for you.”

“Who are my mother and my brothers?” he asked.

Then he looked at those seated in a circle around him and said, “Here are my mother and my brothers! Whoever does God’s will is my brother and sister and mother.”

We often refer to ourselves as brothers and sisters in Christ, and some churches still call each other “brother _______” and “sister _______,” but most have dropped the use of this familiar term, maybe to a detriment. Families hug each other in greeting, so it shouldn’t seem strange for brothers and sisters in Christ to greet each other with a hug.

The early church actually went a step beyond a hug and greeted fellow believers with a kiss. This wasn’t a romantic kiss, but one like Europeans or relatives give to each other, maybe on the cheek. When Paul sent letters to the churches, this is how he told them to greet each other . . .

“Greet one another with a holy kiss. All the churches of Christ send greetings.” Romans 16:16

“All the brothers and sisters here send you greetings. Greet one another with a holy kiss.” 1 Corinthians 16:20

“Greet all God’s people with a holy kiss.” 1 Thessalonians 5:26

Peter also said, “Greet one another with a kiss of love. Peace to all of you who are in Christ.” 1 Peter 5:14

Why Don’t All Churches Hug Today?

I asked several people if they had a time of greeting in their church, and if so, was it shaking hands or hugging. One man replied that there was greeting prior to the service and if you had a relationship with someone you might hug them, but if there had been some animosity or misunderstanding, you wouldn’t want to hug that person. I thought that was interesting since this is church we’re talking about! But then I had a disagreement with someone, and it was hard to hug that person until we resolved it.

When my husband and I travel and attend churches, we notice that sometimes we’re the only people hugging. One church we attend regularly, the pastor sticks out his hand to shake my husband Dave’s hand, and as Dave gives him a hug, the Pastor laughs and says, “Oh yes, you’re the hugger.”

I don’t remember that many people hugging when we first started attending our small mountain community church where we live now, unless they were already friends, but now everyone hugs! I’m so used to hugging people, I once hugged our new neighbor, and I barely knew her. It just seemed like the welcoming thing to do, although she did seem a little surprised, I did it without thinking . . . because I’m a hugger.

[Tweet “Admittedly, some people are extremely private and don’t like people invading their space with a hug.”]

Admittedly, some people are extremely private and don’t like people invading their space. They’re uncomfortable hugging, especially if they don’t know you. I’ve never had anyone take inappropriate advantage of hugging in church, but I suppose that could happen too. And it’s important to caution children to be leery of anyone they don’t know hugging them inappropriately, and be sure your church has a vetting process for everyone working in youth and children’s ministry.

[Tweet “Hugging etiquette considerations at church.”]

Here are hugging etiquette considerations if you’re a hugger like me, but not sure how the other person feels about hugging:

  1. If it’s a first meeting/greeting, shake hands, especially with the opposite sex.
  2. After several meetings, try a side hug. If you feel resistance or tenseness, return to handshakes.
  3. Be open. Explain that you’re a hugger, and ask if they’re OK with a hug in greeting and honor their wishes.

If you’re uncomfortable with hugs, that’s OK. Don’t feel badly or that you have to explain. A bright smile, and kind, friendly greeting speaks volumes.

“An honest answer is like a warm hug.” Psalm 24:26 The Message

What are your thoughts on giving hugs during greeting time at church?

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June 12, 2017
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5 Tactics Satan Uses to Invade Your Church

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churches015

Twenty years ago, when the Lord led me to start the Woman to Woman Mentoring Ministry, I left the business world to go into full-time lay ministry. It was a delightful surprise to discover people would donate their time without expecting payment in return. I expected it to be easy leading Christian team members who would all agree and serve willingly and peacefully.

It was a crushing blow realizing that Christians don’t all agree and get along peacefully, and many of the same divisive issues I encountered in the business world, prevail in the church. I had much to learn and pray about as a ministry leader, and it still disturbs me. The enemy tried to invade and destroy Woman to Woman Mentoring, but praise God it’s still going strong in thousands of churches around the world today. But I had to learn how to identify the divisive tactics of the enemy and how to fight against him. I went straight to the armor of God in Ephesians 6:10-18, where versus 10-12 instruct Christians to . . .

Finally, be strong in the Lord and in his mighty power. Put on the full armor of God, so that you can take your stand against the devil’s schemes. For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms.

Ephesians 6:17 says the only weapon we have against Satan’s invasion is God’s Word, the Bible, the Sword of the Spirit. So it’s no surprise that Satan has managed to remove the Bible from schools, and recently, some pastors have devalued God’s Word saying it’s outdated and irrelevant to today’s culture. Yet, “Jesus Christ is the same yesterday and today and forever” (Heb. 13:8).

[Tweet “Since the beginning of time in the Garden of Eden, Satan’s sole purpose has been to destroy God’s kingdom on earth and overtake the world with evil”]

Since the beginning of time in the Garden of Eden, Satan’s sole purpose has been to destroy God’s kingdom on earth and overtake the world with evil, and his tactical invasion is succeeding, not just in the world, but also in the church. Satan has methodically and effectively:

  • Changed God’s definition of marriage. Certain denominations embrace gay marriage and gay clergy, and it’s dividing their churches.
  • Legalized the killing of unborn babies and selling their body parts—many of whom might have been Christian leaders, presidents, pastors, evangelists, parents, had the cure for cancer, and loud voices in the wilderness.
  • Removed God, prayer, and Bibles from schools.
  • Eliminated God from the public square.

And what has the church done to stop any of this? Very little.

[Tweet “Instead of the church influencing culture, the culture is influencing the church.”]

Instead of the church influencing culture, the culture is influencing the church.

So is it any wonder that in this current election battle, we see Satan zeroing in for a strategic blow: destroying unity in the church body and causing bitter divisions among evangelicals and conservative Christians.In Forsaken God?: Remembering the Goodness of God Our Culture Has Forgotten, I warn of Satan’s impending invasion of the church if believers, who comprise God’s church, don’t take a firm stand against the devil’s schemes (Eph. 6:18):

Satan won’t like you making a concerted effort to remember God. Satan wants you to forget God’s goodness. Let that sink in a minute. If you forget God and his role in your life, then Satan has you just where he wants you. Satan’s target is believers. He doesn’t care about those who love the world because he already has them in his grip. He focuses on luring believers to love something else more than they love God. Satan wants to break God’s heart. Unfortunately, he seems to be succeeding in many areas. If he can get believers to look to the world’s ways, and forget God’s ways, Satan smirks.

Five Tactics Satan Uses to Destroy Churches by Invading Holiness with Worldliness.

“The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy; I have come that they may have life, and have it to the full.” —John 10:10

Secularism

In a Washington Post article, Michelle Boorestein quoted Pastor Rick Scarborough, who has spent 20 years trying to politically mobilize evangelical voters: “Evangelicals are so divided….It’s because we are living in a growing age of secularism that is forcing itself on people who hold traditional values . . . . Some frame the split as Christian pragmatists vs. Christian idealists.”

No one, not even Satan, can “force” secularism or pragmatism on people who hold traditional values. It’s a choice.

[Tweet ” Culture never trumps Scripture.”]

Satan is hijacking high-profile liberal pastors and several mainline denominations who expound that: the Bible isn’t inerrant or relevant, God is a myth, Jesus is a legend, and the church needs to catch up with the culture. Culture never trumps Scripture. Even if you’ve been a member for years of one of these denominations or churches that now succumbs to this unbiblical, satanical teaching—run—leave immediately, and take your family with you.*

These “liberals” defiantly ignore Jesus’s warning that Christians are in the world, but not of the world. And Jesus didn’t come to conform to the culture; he came to reform the culture.*

Do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is—his good, pleasing and perfect will. —Romans 12:2

Selfishness

The center of all divisiveness is selfishness and pride. We want things our way, the way we think is right. The church often doesn’t agree on what Christ wants for His church.

Adults in churches usually divide into groups such as seniors, empty nesters, young adults, singles, marrieds, which is fine for small groups or Bible studies; but when those groups think more about their own wants and needs than what’s best for the church and the future of the church, it’s selfish. The church laments that they’re losing the youth, but are they willing to make the selfless effort to save them?

[Tweet “The church is failing to reach out to the next generation with a message relevant to the world they live in today”]

The church is failing to reach out to the next generation with a message relevant to the world they live in today; but the secular world is ready and waiting for them. The next generation is falling away from the church in droves or erroneously choosing a pseudo-gospel of compromise and feel-good theology. Today, even children from Bible-believing homes may not have the tools or fortitude to equip them to face a liberal world drifting away from the God of the Bible.*

Many churches don’t want to change the way they’ve always done things. Selfish pride is at the root of arguments, dissension, hurt feelings, gossip, complaining, refusal to change . . . and God hates pride, which means that Satan loves it.

[Tweet “God hates pride, which means that Satan loves it. “]

For everything in the world—the lust of the flesh, the lust of the eyes, and the pride of life—comes not from the Father but from the world.—1 John 2:16

Sin

[Tweet “How many in congregations today are living a sinful life without feeling any pangs of remorse because the church isn’t confronting them? “]

How many in congregations today are living a sinful life without feeling any pangs of remorse because the church isn’t confronting them? How many pastors are afraid of retaliation if they call homosexuality, living together, adultery, abortion, lying, or cheating a sin? Satan is the father of sin and he has done well when the church cowers in fear of being called judgmental, haters, prejudiced. Why did Jesus have to endure the painful cross for forgiveness of our sins, if the church now refuses to call sin, a sin?

Jesus loves all people, but he hates sin—that’s why he went to the cross. Not so we could keep on sinning, but because, “the wages of sin is death, but the gift of God is eternal life in Christ Jesus our Lord” (Rom. 6:23). If a church doesn’t understand how to love the sinner without embracing the sin, it may either abandon the sinner, or avoid confronting the sin and thus condone it.

Woe to the world because of the things that cause people to stumble! Such things must come, but woe to the person through whom they come!—Matthew 18:7

Scandal

[Tweet “Churches don’t always have, or enforce, a system of accountability and mentoring at every level of leadership. “]

Many pastors, church leaders, and prominent Christians succumb to moral or financial failures. Churches don’t always have, or enforce, a system of accountability and mentoring at every level of leadership. Or some church staff may think they’re safe and above needing such protective measures, and that’s right where Satan wants them with a target on their back.

When one of these Christian leaders, or someone in their family falls, the media, and many Christians and fellow pastors, are quick to voice opinions and denounce them publically. The church may not respond biblically, which is why nonbelievers characterize Christians as the only group that “eats its own.”

Brothers and sisters, if someone is caught in a sin, you who live by the Spirit should restore that person gently. But watch yourselves, or you also may be tempted.—Galatians 6:1

Social Acceptance

[Tweet “The church should only seek the exclusive acceptance of, and answer to, the Head of the Church—Jesus Christ.”]

Many voices are screaming louder than the church, which in its attempt to be culturally relevant, may widen the road that Jesus said is narrow. Political correctness and ideological inclusiveness, overshadows biblical truthfulness. The church should only seek the exclusive acceptance of, and answer to, the Head of the Church—Jesus Christ.

If you belonged to the world, it would love you as its own. As it is, you do not belong to the world, but I have chosen you out of the world. That is why the world hates you.—John 15:19

Sensationalism

[Tweet “Cultural Christianity creates an entertainment church, emphasizing popular people more than Holy God. “]

Cultural Christianity creates an entertainment church, emphasizing popular people more than Holy God. Churches try the latest trend rather than leading from the Holy Spirit. Parishioners often want a pastor who doesn’t challenge them. Concert-style worship can detract from the purpose of musical worship—inviting in the Holy Spirit and drawing close to God, an atmosphere Satan hates. But Satan loves it when earplugs accompany the bulletin, little children plug their ears, and only those on stage sing because the music is so loud parishioners can’t hear themselves or each other.

Many churches today are dark inside, pitch black with a few strobe lights. Bible verses project on a screen because it’s too dark to read a Bible, so many people don’t even take a Bible to church. Oh how Satan loves that because he knows they’ve put down their swords—the Word of God.

Repeatedly, the Bible tells us to come out of the dark and into the light. Underground churches have to meet in the dark, and maybe only have one Bible to share with everyone; but we own Bibles and we can still lift the blinds, throw open the windows, and let the Son shine in so others can see us coming back to the heart of worship.

For once you were full of darkness, but now you have light from the Lord. So live as people of light! For this light within you produces only what is good and right and true. —Eph. 5:8-9 NLT

What Should the Church do to Combat Satan’s Divisive Tactics?

Believers must agree to stand together united as the Christian church—led by Christ and based on biblical truths—and fight Satan using prayer and the Sword of the Spirit—the World of God—as our battle plan and strong fortress.

But, dear friends, remember what the apostles of our Lord Jesus Christ foretold. 18 They said to you, “In the last times there will be scoffers who will follow their own ungodly desires.” These are the people who divide you, who follow mere natural instincts and do not have the Spirit.

But you, dear friends, by building yourselves up in your most holy faith and praying in the Holy Spirit, keep yourselves in God’s love as you wait for the mercy of our Lord Jesus Christ to bring you to eternal life. —Jude 1:17-21

Otherwise, “If a house is divided against itself, that house cannot stand” (Mark 3:25). “I appeal to you, brothers and sisters, in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ, that all of you agree with one another in what you say and that there be no divisions among you, but that you be perfectly united in mind and thought” (1 Cor. 1:10).

How do you see Satan using these tactics in your church?

*Excerpts from Forsaken God?: Remembering the Goodness of God Our Culture Has Forgotten

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October 10, 2016
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Remember Not Every Woman is “Happy” on Mother’s Day

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My daughter Kim and I were just on the phone making Mother’s Day plans. As we chatted about what we would do to celebrate her being the mother of my three darling grandchildren, and me being Kim’s mom . . . my mind wandered back to a Mother’s Day twelve years ago that wasn’t so happy for Kim.

In Dear God, Why Can’t I Have a Baby? A Companion Guide for Couples on the Infertility Journey, Kim shares a painful and heartbreaking Mother’s Day:

Dear God,

It’s almost Mother’s Day and I don’t know if I can handle seeing all those happy moms at church and brunch. I’m trying to focus on my mom and not think about how I’m missing out on being a mommy on yet another Mother’s Day. This year is especially hard since we’ve been trying to be parents for so long and so hard, only to be repeatedly disappointed. At the store looking for a card for my mom, I see the cute cards at the end of the aisle “To Mommy”…oh God, I wish I were someone’s mommy! I look away and continue focusing at the task ahead, getting my mom and mothers-in-law their cards.

Today’s the day, it’s Mother’s Day. I don’t think I can bear it. It’s just begun and already I want this day over. I pull myself out of bed and get ready for church. I’m not looking forward to the sermon about children being a blessing and honoring mothers. God, help me focus on my mom.

We met my parents at church and I put on my happy face, when inside I was crying watching all the mothers with big smiles dressed in pretty spring dresses and children running all around. This was a day of celebration and I just wanted to go back to bed. The pastor started the message with asking all the mothers to stand up. Hundreds of women stood and everyone applauded. I couldn’t take it any longer and sat slouched over in my seat quietly crying. Toby put his arm around me and my mom held my hand, but nothing took away the pain. I barely heard the rest of the message.

After brunch, I came home, collapsed on my bed, and cried myself to sleep where I remained the rest of the day. God, please don’t make me go through another Mother’s Day with this hole in my heart. I want to stand up in church with all those other mothers beaming from ear to ear and have everyone applaud me. God, please let me stand up next year.

Some of you identify with Kim’s cry out to God.

“I hate Mother’s Day!” admitted a dear friend longing for a baby. “You know that women struggling with infertility don’t go to church on Mother’s Day.” Kris agrees, “I was that mom-in-waiting for sixteen years. I stayed away from baby showers, church, and pregnant friends. I didn’t stop praying, but it was the worse pain.”

Lisa concurs, “I am guilty of having skipped church on Mother’s Day a few years before we adopted my son.”

[Tweet “1 in 6 Women Experience Infertility”]

Someone You Know is Struggling with Infertility

Mother’s Day is especially hard for mommies-in-waiting, but for most of these women, every day is hard. With 1 in 6 couples experiencing infertility, you are, or know, a woman experiencing this heartache. Often we don’t know what to say to them, so we say nothing, or maybe unintentionally say something that makes them feel worse. Kris says, “We cannot ignore them [women longing for a child]. I know how hard it was for people to talk to me. But I would have loved it if they did.”

[Tweet “We cannot ignore them [women longing for a child]. I know how hard it was for people to talk to me. But I would have loved it if they did.””]

Avoidance only adds to these hurting women’s feelings of isolation and loneliness. When you don’t know what to say or do these suggestions might help: “Top Fifteen Things Not to Say or Do and to Say or Do to Someone Experiencing Infertility.”

[Tweet “It breaks my heart to hear that many women say the one place they feel the loneliest is in the church.”]

It breaks my heart to hear that many women say the one place they feel the loneliest is in the church. Doesn’t that break your heart too? Jesus said he came for the sick, and that includes heartsick. The church should be a safe place for the hurting, not a place where they feel shunned or like outcasts.

How does your church comfort mommies-in-waiting on Mother’s Day … and every day?

Mothers of Prodigals

[Tweet “Mothers of prodigals are another group of women who dread Mother’s Day. “]

Mothers of prodigals are another group of women who dread Mother’s Day. They may not know where their child is, or know all too well where he or she is, and that breaks a mother’s heart and the heart of God. These moms need comforting, a hug, and assurance that this day is for them too.

Mothers Who Have Lost a Child

A mother who has lost a child, lives with that grief every day, but Mother’s Day is a painful reminder of the precious child they lost. I can’t imagine that pain, but I watched the sadness in my Granny Reed’s eyes that was always there over the murder of my father, her beloved son, a week before his 37th birthday. She had six other living children who she loved dearly, but there was always pain for the one she lost.

Women Who Have Lost Their Mother

[Tweet “There’s a void and ache that never goes away when your mom is no longer living on Mother’s Day “]

Mother’s Day is about celebrating your mom, but there’s a void and ache that never goes away when your mom is no longer living, and Mother’s Day becomes a sad reminder of all the years you celebrated her on Mother’s Day. It can also be a joyous time of remembering, but still there’s no one to buy a card for, give a hug to, and a special gift for the years she devoted to raising you. Even after you become a mom yourself and your children are celebrating you, there’s a generational celebration as you are still somebody’s little girl, just all grown up.

I hope that you will not ignore but love on the mommies-in-waiting, the moms of prodigals, or the moms who have lost a child or their own mom, who may need a shoulder to cry on . . . a prayer . . . an understanding hug this Mother’s Day.

[Tweet “If you’ve been where they’re at, mentor them like only someone who has been in their shoes can. “]

If you’ve been where they’re at, mentor them like only someone who has been in their shoes can. If you haven’t been in their shoes, let them know you can’t possibly understand, but you’re there for them and God is too!

“Therefore encourage one another and build each other up, just as you are already doing.”—1 Thessalonians 5:11 (NLT)

Lindsey Bell shared another helpful blog post on my website 6 Thing Not to Say to Someone Who is Hurting (And What to Say Instead)

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May 2, 2016
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