Why We Need Mentoring by Tammy Keene

Tammy Keene is the leader of the mentoring ministry Touching Another Generation, TAG, at First Baptist Church of Riverview. I’m looking forward to meeting Tammy and speaking at her church in 2019. Tammy knows I’m on a book deadline and offered to write her thoughts on mentoring, and I welcomed them. This will be a two-part post, so check back next week for the conclusion. So here’s Tammy!

Why We Need Mentoring by Tammy Keene

Why We Need Mentoring by Tammy Kenne leadero of Touching Another Generation Mentoring Ministry

I have the privilege of leading my church’s women’s mentoring ministry, Touching Another Generation, TAG. We model our ministry after the Titus 2 woman, and our key verse is Psalm 145:4, “One generation shall praise your works to another and shall declare your mighty acts.”

In the past when I shared my testimony, I would begin with God’s call on my life in 2015. After reflecting on the blessings that I’ve received, God has illuminated another truth in my life, mentoring has been a lifelong process.

[Tweet “Mentoring is a lifelong process”]

Mentoring has enriched my life!

[Tweet “Mentoring is necessary for women”]

Mentoring is necessary for women, and I know that God uniquely designed me and gave me this passion for mentoring.

Janet Thompson’s Woman to Woman Mentoring Ministry DVD kit was an invaluable tool to create a mentoring ministry at my church. Her step-by-step approach provided the information necessary to launch and sustain our mentoring ministry. The kit provided me with a ready-made outline for our first Orientation Coffee and Kickoff Event including the following:

  • From Lucibel Van Atta’s book – Women Encouraging Women:

“Mentoring isn’t just another activity to scrunch into our already over-crowded calendars. It is a relationship, a commitment, a step of faith. A faith defined as giving God the opportunity to fulfill His promise through our lives. And this is indeed what pleases God, ‘And without faith it is impossible to please God’ (Hebrews 11:6).”

  • A Mentor is ‘someone close and trusted and experienced.’ Mentoring requires no special talent. All God asks is for us to take seriously the task of nurturing and building up other women.
  • As Christian women we are to share with another Christian woman how Christ has helped us through the joys and pains of our lives. We are to remind our younger sisters in Christ to go to Christ and let Him walk beside us, comfort us, and guide us.

[Tweet “Mentoring is an intentional relationship, sharing your faith journey with another woman”]

  • Mentoring is an intentional relationship, sharing your faith journey with another woman because women need women!
  • A mentor is someone who has experienced life and is willing to walk alongside of a sister in Christ.
  • A mentee is simply a spiritually younger woman willing to be mentored by an experienced sister in Christ. She may not have all of the answers but she is willing to walk alongside of you.                       

Mentoring is a two-way relationship!

[Tweet “Mentoring is a two-way relationship!”]

           Why mentoring?

  • It’s biblical.

God instructs women to model godly behavior for other women.

In the same way, older women are to be reverent in behavior, not slanderers, not slaves to excessive drinking. They are to teach what is good, so that they may encourage the young women to love their husbands and to love their children, to be self-controlled, pure, workers at home, kind, and in submission to their husbands, so that God’s word will not be slandered. Titus 2:3-5 (CSB)

The Apostle Paul provides specific instructions for teaching sound doctrine with a specific admonition to women. We’re responsible for training godly women, how else are they to learn what is expected of them?

           Why mentoring?

  • It’s a blessing. God will bless you through the relationship.

Her mouth speaks wisdom, and loving instruction is on her tongue. Proverbs 31:26 (CSB)

Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of mercies and God of all comfort.  Who comforts us in all our affliction, so that we may be able to comfort those who are in any affliction, with the comfort with which we ourselves are comforted by God. For as we share abundantly in Christ’s sufferings, so through Christ we share abundantly in comfort also. 2 Corinthians 1:3-5

So if there is any encouragement in Christ, any comfort from love, any participation in the Spirit, any affection and sympathy. Complete my joy by being of the same mind, having the same love, being in full accord of one mind. Philippians 2:1-2

[Tweet “Mentoring not only blesses us, but we are able to bless others.”]

Mentoring not only blesses us, but we are able to bless others.

A mentor in Janet Thompson’s book, Mentoring for All Seasons, stated: “Comfort with the same comfort we received from God in our difficult season. God puts people in our path going through something we’ve experienced and survived with his help and he expects us to reach out to them with the power of his love, healing, and forgiveness.” (p. 186).

And God is able to make every grace overflow to you, so that in every way, always having everything you need, you may excel in every good work. 2 Corinthians 9:8

          Why mentoring?

  • It builds you. God will use the mentoring relationship to build your confidence in yourself, but especially your confidence in His Word.

[Tweet “God will use the mentoring relationship to build your confidence in yourself, but especially your confidence in His Word.”]

Having a mature sister in Christ will help keep you focused on putting first things first, which will build your confidence. Character building is encouraged by having a godly woman walking beside you. When you’re in a mentoring relationship, you have another woman to share prayer requests and life challenges. Having a godly woman to walk alongside of you as you walk through life’s daily challenges is a blessing, but it also will illuminate the biblical foundation built through the relationship and the strengthening of your relationship with God.

In the fall of 2014, my husband and I learned that at the end of the year we both would lose our jobs. I know that God was teaching me to trust Him in all things, but especially with our careers. I reached out to my mentor Tisha and asked her to pray for wisdom and discernment with our job search.

As she faithfully prayed, I kept her updated with my search and interviews. It was the middle of January, she prayed that God would knock my socks off and He did. I had seven interviews scheduled in one week! I actually had to cancel one. Tisha was modeling a very important lesson, pray specifically and wait for God to show up! God answered our prayers and my husband and I both had new jobs by March.

How has mentoring blessed your life?

If you received this blog by email, please leave a comment here.

Tammy Keene is the founder and leader of Touching Another Generation Mentoring Ministry at First Baptist Church of Riverview. I love this picture of Tammy!

Tammy Keene writes about Why Mentoring Is Necessary

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The Hospitality Gap by Cyndee Ownbey

I know you will all appreciate this article from Cyndee Ownbey, our guest blogger. I wonder how many of you have experienced the “Hospitality Gap” in a church you visited or maybe weren’t aware of the gap in your own church. The Lord reminds us how important hospitality is to people we might not know. Your church may have had a visit from an angel but no one introduced themself to him or her. 

Do not forget to show hospitality to strangers, for by so doing some people have shown hospitality to angels without knowing it. Hebrews 13:2

The Hospitality Gap by Cyndee Ownbey

The Hospitality Gap

Nowadays most churches have a procedure in place for welcoming guests.

Many churches have clearly marked parking spaces.

Signage is clear.

The entrance is marked.

You may even be ushered by a parking lot greeter to the connection center, table, or desk in the lobby.

You’ll likely be asked to complete an information card.

A free gift awaits after the service.

Due to several moves and a year-long stint in a rental home after our last move, we’ve had the opportunity to visit a large number of churches.

The welcome we’ve received has varied from church to church, but all had one thing in common.

Each church we visited suffered from a hospitality gap.

A hospitality gap occurs when a warm welcome shifts to a frigid silence.

[Tweet “A hospitality gap occurs when a warm welcome shifts to a frigid silence.”]

We’ve experienced a hospitality gap not just as we’ve attended worship services, but also when we’ve attended church events.

In every church the attempts to welcome stopped as we crossed the threshold of the sanctuary or event doors.

After being greeted warmly at the outside doors with many shouts of “Welcome!” and “Good morning!” we encountered an almost icy silence as we passed through the doors and found a seat.

No one sought us out. No one talked to us. We sat in silence as members and regular attendees greeted each other warmly with hugs and conversation.

Inside the sanctuary, folks were friendly, but only to each other.

[Tweet “Inside the sanctuary folk were friendly, but only to each other.”]

In some churches, we were able to navigate that awkward feeling of not belonging by reading through the Sunday bulletin, though many churches no longer distribute them.

At events, the hospitality gap was much more pronounced and much more painful.

Friends would rush in to grab a seat by those they love and know, while the empty chairs around me sat empty until necessity required someone to sit in the chairs beside me.

There is a solution to the hospitality gap.

In addition to positioning greeters at the doors, hospitality teams need to position greeters inside the venue.

[Tweet “To eliminate the hospitality gap in churches, hospitality teams need to position greeters inside the venue.”]

At least three people, more for larger churches and events, should be tasked with approaching and welcoming those who appear to be new or newer faces in the crowd.

This elite team needs to be staffed with people who are outgoing, warm, and friendly. They must be able to shake off the embarrassment of accidentally welcoming long-time members as new guests. They need to be trained to ask good questions and listen to those answers.

  • I don’t believe we’ve met before, how long have you been attending First Baptist?
  • Welcome! Sure is a hot one out there today! Are you all enjoying your summer?
  • Hello, I’m Marie. I couldn’t help but notice you have a son that looks to be about the same age as mine. What grade is he in?
  • Good morning! Are you all new to The Refuge?

Earlier this year I shared on Facebook about an experience I had at a church event where I experienced the hospitality gap. I pre-registered so there was every reason for the planning team to know I was a new person.

Not only was the hostess missing from her post at the door, but I sat alone for almost 10 minutes, watching all of the other women warmly greet one another.

I felt so unwelcome…

Many women commented that they wouldn’t have stayed. One even said she would have hidden in the bathroom. Another said she would have cried.

I admit, part of me wanted to cry and part of me wanted to bolt never to return again.

I have no doubt God allowed me to experience that awkward loneliness so I could share my experience and encourage those in leadership to literally stand in the gap. In this case, the hospitality gap.

Many of your visitors won’t give your church a second chance to make them feel unwanted.

I pray we’ll take that extra step, fill our hospitality gaps, and warmly welcome every person that walks through the door.

Have you ever experienced the hospitality gap at a church worship service or event?

What steps can you take to make certain the guests at your church don’t fall through the cracks?

If you received this blog by email, please leave a comment here.

The Hospitality Gap by Cyndee Ownby

Cyndee Ownbey is passionate about ensuring every guest receives a warm welcome. With almost 20 years of experience ministering to women, she encourages and equips women’s ministry leaders and Bible study leaders with an abundance of resources on her site: Women’s Ministry Toolbox. You’re invited to follow and connect with Cyndee on Facebook and Instagram.

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Laughing All the Way by Karen O’connor

Our guest blogger this week is long time friend and author Karen O’Connor sharing about her new book Laughing All the Way. No matter what season of life you’re in right now, we’re all going to grow older, and Karen gives wise perspective on how to enjoy the life God has granted to each of us.

Karen is offering a free copy of Laughing All the Way. Just leave a comment below to enter the drawing. It would make a great gift!

I came across this quote in Our Daily Bread (9/7/18) article “Unchanging Love” by James Banks, “We grow older and the world around us may change, but God’s love doesn’t. He can always be trusted to take care of those who turn to Him.”

Laughing All the Way

By Karen O’Connor

Laughing All the Way by Karen O'Connor

“The tragedy of life is not that it ends too soon, but that we wait so long to begin it,” said William Mather Lewis, American teacher, university president, and state and national government official.

[Tweet “”The tragedy of life is not that it ends too soon, but that we wait so long to begin it,” William Mather Lewis”]

This quote gave me pause as I considered my own life now that I’m heading down the home stretch. Do I give up and just watch TV or do I open the door and walk outside eager for what God might bring my way today? I want to open the door but sometimes I’m afraid or worried or anxious about what might be out there.

[Tweet “Karen O’Connor says I decided that hiding out, using old age as an excuse, was completely contrary to my personality and my experience.”]

I decided that hiding out, using old age as an excuse, was completely contrary to my personality and my experience so I decided to write one more book, continue teaching writing to young people online, and sign up for substitute teaching one day a week at a nearby school.

Once I put all these actions in motion, I watched my fears and worries melt away. I was smiling more and pretty soon laughing at the obstacles I had erected for myself. I share my experiences and those of others in my new book: Laughing All the Way: Wit, Wisdom, and Willpower for the Golden Years. (Harvest House Publishers, 2018).

[Tweet “Karen O’connor says If you feel the need for mentoring from an old gal who’s been there and done that, I hope my book will provide it”]

If you feel the need for a bit of mentoring from an old gal who’s been there and done that, I hope my book will provide it through chapters in the following sections:

Making New Choices will cover some of the ways we can become involved with new people and places, as well as new ways of thinking.

Accepting New Challenges will highlight the inevitable experiences that are part of the aging process: illness, loss of a loved one, financial worries and so on, and how we can accept and work with them in positive ways—and even smile through them.

Taking New Chances will prompt you to risk more and worry less, to do that thing you’ve always wanted to do—whether it’s singing lessons, or running a marathon for seniors, or repairing a broken friendship before it’s too late.

Opening New Chapters will suggest ways to rekindle your relationship with God, how to live in the heartland of gratitude and joy regardless of the circumstances, and coming to realize that growing old is truly a ‘privilege few people get to experience.’

[Tweet “Growing old is truly a ‘privilege few people get to experience.’Karen O’Connor”]

I’d love to hear from you about what you’re doing to make the most of growing older with wit, wisdom, and willpower. Please visit me:

https://www.karenoconnor.com

https://www.facebook.com/karen.p.oconnor

Don’t forget to leave a comment below to join the drawing to receive a copy of Karen’s new book. If you received this blog by email, please leave a comment here.

Laughing All the Way by Karen O'Connor

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10 Ways To Teach Babies, Toddlers, And Young Children Biblical Principles by Lee Ann Mancini

Our guest blogger this week is Lee Ann Mancini whose new book Forever With Jesus released earlier this month. Lee Ann shares my heart for reaching the next generation for Christ, and the earlier we start with our children and grandchildren the better. She offers some great ideas complete with websites of ways to introduce young children to the love of Christ in ways they will understand and appreciate. Enjoy and share with everyone who has children in their life! Also a chance to enter a drawing for a free copy signed by Lee Ann. Just leave a comment. Would make a great birthday, Christmas, or baby shower gift!

10 WAYS TO TEACH BABIES, TODDLERS, AND YOUNG CHILDREN BIBLICAL PRINCIPLES USING TOOLS CHILDREN WILL LOVE!  

By Lee Ann Mancini

HOW TO TEACH BABIES, TODDLERS AND YOUNG CHILDREN BIBLICAL PRINCIPLES USING VARIOUS TOOLS CHILDREN LOVE! by Lee Ann Mancini 

All of us want our children and grandchildren to grow up to be filled with hope, joy, and love rather than the negativism, despair, and pessimism that is so prevalent in the modern era.

[Tweet “Young children have the ability to develop a sense of confidence, trust, and truth that comes from God.”]

Do your children have a strong foundation in Jesus? Do they exhibit the fruit of the Spirit? Young children have the ability to develop a sense of confidence, trust, and truth that comes from God. They develop this from watching their parents respond to the daily challenges of life.

When I was young, there was a picture of Jesus that hung on the wall of our tiny house. My mother would often pray to Jesus and ask him for help. Although I was just a little girl, I remember watching her and feeling happy because I knew that Jesus would take care of all our needs. I developed this strong confidence in God from seeing my mother live out her faith.

At a young age, my mother placed me in Sunday School. I recall that I adored my Sunday School teacher. Like my mother, she was also a woman of great faith. She expressed the love of Jesus to me through her every action. I could tell she loved me dearly, and that love she had for me solidified my desire at a young age to know Jesus.

[Tweet “10 ways for teaching babies and preschoolers about the love of Jesus”]

Here are 10 ideas for teaching babies and preschoolers about the love of Jesus:

  1. The “Jesus Loves Me” Lullaby Teddy Bear by Gund is an adorable baby gift. By the time your child enters preschool, they will be familiar with the words and excitedly exclaim, “I know this song!” when they hear the teacher play it in class. This happened with my son!
  2. Babies love board books that are filled with colorful pictures and fun pages to touch and feel.  All God’s Creatures by Karen Hill is a really good example. It concludes, “Thank you for animals, big and small. Heavenly Father, you made them all!”
  3. Wee Believers https://weebelievers.com offers an adorable stuffed animal lamb that says prayers. BibleToys.com and ThePuppetStore.com also have some great Christian toys for young children.
  4. Breath prayers are wonderful. These are prayers that are short and can be said within one breath. For example, while you are out walking, find a pretty flower to show to your preschooler and say, “Thank you, God, for this beautiful flower!”
  5. Kneel with your child at bedtime and pray with them. Let them see and hear you pray often.
  6. Tell your children how much you love both them and Jesus. I remember telling my kids, “I love you and Jesus so much!” You want your children to learn to say, “I love Mommy, Daddy, and Jesus!” all in the same sentence. As parents, we should never miss an opportunity to help our children build a strong foundation in Christ!
  7. Do arts and crafts projects together that revolve around biblical concepts. You can find a wonderful list of biblical ideas for arts and crafts at http://www.truthforkids.com/crafts-for-bible-lessons.
  8. Throw a Bible-themed birthday party for your kids. Turn their special day into an opportunity to have some godly fun. Make goody bags filled with religious candy and stickers. (Oriental Trading is a good source for these.) Play Christian card games that are educational. ChildrensMinistry.com has a nice list of biblical games for preschoolers ().
  9. Read Bible stories to your kids. There is a plethora of Bibles geared towards young children. Also, read picture books that teach children to pray to Jesus in real life situations. My series, Adventures of the Sea Kids, helps children build a foundation in Christ and learn to love others as Christ loves us. My books are available at.
  10. Most importantly, make sure your children know how much you love Christ. Try to show the love of Christ to everyone you encounter. Remember that your actions speak louder than your words!

Which of the above 10 Ways do you think the young child in your life would enjoy the most?

[Tweet “Lee Ann Mancini has an award-winning series titled, “Adventures of the Sea Kids” that helps children learn how to have a relationship with Jesus,”]

In my mission to help build a strong foundation in Christ for children under seven, I have an award-winning series titled, “Adventures of the Sea Kids” that helps children learn how to have a relationship with Jesus, and how to be like Jesus during difficult situations that children face.

[Tweet “Forever With Jesus by Lee Ann Mancini deals with sin, salvation, and death. Children learn there is nothing to fear about death for those who believe in Jesus!”]

Please visit http://glmpublishing.net/for trailers and more information. Each book has discussion questions, word search, quizzes, and coloring sheets to help parents integrate the biblical principles taught. Also, there is a hidden symbol on each page that the children and parents love to find! Our latest book, Forever With Jesus, deals with sin, salvation, and death. Children learn there is nothing to fear about death for those who believe in Jesus!

HOW TO TEACH BABIES, TODDLERS AND YOUNG CHILDREN BIBLICAL PRINCIPLES USING VARIOUS TOOLS CHILDREN LOVE! By Lee Ann Mancini

We would love to hear about any new ideas or questions you may have!!

It is the responsibility of all adults to help raise the next generation in Christ! 

[Tweet “It is the responsibility of all adults to help raise the next generation in Christ!”]

Leave a comment for a chance to win a free copy of Forever with Jesus. If you received this blog by email, leave a comment here.

HOW TO TEACH BABIES, TODDLERS AND YOUNG CHILDREN BIBLICAL PRINCIPLES USING VARIOUS TOOLS CHILDREN LOVE!

http://www.leeannmancini.com

Lee Ann Mancini’s series Adventures of the Sea Kids, published by GLM Publishing LLC, has won numerous accolades. Lee Ann Mancini graduated with a Bachelor of Arts in Religious Studies from Regent University, a Masters in Biblical and Theology Studies from Knox Seminary, and a Masters in Christian Studies from Trinity Evangelical Divinity School. In addition to writing Christian children’s books, Lee Ann is currently an adjunct professor at South Florida Bible College and Theological Seminary. Lee Ann also speaks to women groups regarding the redemptive power of the gospel represented though the types of brides of the church.

Lee Ann is married and has two children. She loves to read, jog, and teach the Word of God.

Adventures of the Sea Kids  Facebook link

https://twitter.com/GLMPublishing

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Hope for the Lonely By Jennifer Slattery

When I started the Woman to Woman Mentoring Ministry, the common theme I heard from women joining the ministry was, “I’m lonely!” Others said, they had friends, but no Christian friends and they felt lonely without another woman to share their faith. Our guest blogger today, Jennifer Slattery, has a passion for helping women discover, embrace, and live out who they are in Christ. 

Hope for the Lonely By Jennifer Slattery

Hope for the Lonely by Jennifer Slattery gives hope to women who struggle with lonliness

She’s the woman whose kids are grown and so busy launching their new lives, she feels there’s no room for her. She’s the young adult who, after accepting a job halfway across the country, spends every evening alone. And she’s the mother, the wife, or caregiver who, for countless reasons, spends her day engaging with hundreds of virtual friends on Facebook wishing one of them would step away from their screens to see her, truly see her.

[Tweet “She’s the mother, wife, or caregiver who spends her day engaging with hundreds of friends on Facebook, wishing one of them would step away from their screens to see her, truly see her.”]

We’ve become the lonely, disconnected generation. According to statistics, nearly one quarter of us don’t have anyone we feel we can rely on and half of us don’t have a single confidant outside of family. This means, on any given Sunday, there’s a 50-50 chance the woman sitting next to us is deeply in need of a friend.

[Tweet “From the beginning of time, God placed the need to connect deep within our hearts.”]

We weren’t meant to live in solitude. From the beginning of time, God placed the need to connect deep within our hearts. This need, embedded within us, was designed to draw us closer to one another and closer to our Savior.

In a perfect, grace-filled world, that’s exactly what would happen. But sin invaded the creation God once called very good and tainted our relationships and wounded our hearts, driving wedges between us.

Sins’ isolating effects

If you're lonely God can help. There's hope for the lonely says Jennifer Slattery

We long for connection, but we fear this at the same time, because true relationship requires risk. A risk that leaves us vulnerable to pain and open to rejection.

[Tweet “We try to change who we are to gain acceptance in an attempt to fill the gaping hole within instead of surrendering our hearts, longing, and pain to Christ.”]

So we hide, or strive to change who we are in order to gain acceptance in an attempt to fill in the gaping hole in our soul through our own strength. I’ve seen this again and again, and the casualty that results after years of defensive, destructive living.

I’ve seen the pain. I’ve heard the stories of abandonment and betrayal, of fear and self-protection. Of longing for relational intimacy.

What we fear

[Tweet “Statistics say women fear loneliness more than a cancer diagnosis”]

Statistics say women fear loneliness more than a cancer diagnosis

Think about that for a moment. They fear feeling insignificant, unknown, and unseen over contracting a potentially terminal illness. And yet, that doesn’t really surprise me. We all know the joy of spending a lazy, giggly day with someone we love. When a dear friend was dying of brain cancer, what pained her most wasn’t her loss of vision or speech or motor skills, but the time she’d never have with her three little boys. Those moments were precious, made all the more so because she knew they wouldn’t last.

[Tweet “Relationships matter. They’re a core part of who we are.”]

And so, I get it. Relationships matter. They’re a core part of who we are. Who we were created to be. Of course, we ache when that necessary piece of life is missing. But even in our pain, there’s hope, because we follow a reconciling, uniting God. The Hand that formed us from the dust, that breathed life into our mortal lungs, and created within us a need for connection, unites us by His blood.

God can help

He’s our Creator and Provider, which means, if He planted this need deep within us, He will fill it. But it might take time. It’ll take pushing through hard conversations, holding tight to relationships when others don’t behave as we’d hoped. It’ll take digging deep into our hurts and fears and insecurities and handing those over to Jesus.

[Tweet “Friendships require digging deep into our hurts, fears, and insecurities and handing those over to Jesus.”]

It’ll take finding an imperfect yet grace-filled church family we can plant our roots deep into. Because here’s the deal—we don’t need random, superficial relationships. Those will only leave us feeling empty and depleted.

[Tweet “we don’t need random, superficial relationships. Those will only leave us feeling empty and depleted.”]

We need unity. Sisterhood. A strong and committed family.

Are you lonely? There's hope by Jennifer Slattery

And as much as we need this, our sisters do as well. You may have heard the phrase: If you want a friend, be one. The same sentiment applies here, because nearly 50% of the women you and I meet in a given day are lonely. Deeply lonely. Painfully lonely.

You can be their friend. You can help fill that hole. As you do, maybe you’ll find your hole fills as well.

Did anything resonate with you today?

  • How might past hurts and the fears those can generate be keeping you from deep and lasting community?
  • How might surrendering those to Jesus bring you to a deeper level of freedom and friendships?
  • Or perhaps God’s calling you to reach out to someone else. What might it look like to truly be Jesus to that person?

Share your thoughts, examples, and suggestions with us in the comments below, because we can all learn from and encourage one another!

If you received this blog by email, please leave a comment here.

Pictures above courtesy of Unsplash.

Hope for the Lonely by Jennifer Slattery

Jennifer Slattery is a writer, editor, and speaker who’s addressed women’s groups, church groups, Bible studies, and writers across the nation. She’s the author of six contemporary novels and maintains a devotional blog found at JenniferSlatteryLivesOutLoud.com.  As the founder of Wholly Loved Ministries, she and her team partner with churches to facilitate events designed to help women rest in their true worth and live with maximum impact. Visit her online to find out more about her speaking or to book her for your next women’s event. When not writing, reading, or editing, Jennifer loves going on mall dates with her adult daughter and coffee dates with her hilariously fun husband.

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Caregiving Lessons Aren’t Just for Caregivers by Cheri Swalwell

I have a big favor to ask. Would you take a short quick survey to help my publisher and me with the title of the book I’m currently writing! It won’t take five minutes. Thanks so much. Here’s the link.

This week’s guest blogger is Cheri Swalwell. I know you’ll enjoy her lessons learned from caregiving that we can apply to all areas of our life.
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Caregiving Lessons Aren’t Just for Caregivers by Cheri Swalwell

This past spring, I co-lead my first life group. While we studied the book Caring for the Caregiver, God used the time to teach me multiple truths, which apply to many areas of life, not just caregiving.

I’m Not in Control

One lesson God has been teaching me through the study is “I’m not in control.” So true when providing care for another. While I may be able to control when I offer food, rest, medication, and/or bathroom privileges, I cannot force someone to eat, drink, sleep, use the bathroom, or take medication. I’m not in control of the other person agreeing and following through.

The same is true whether dealing with friends, family, or just strangers on the street. So, you may ask: What can we do when the control is out of our hands?

[Tweet “Pray – before, during, and after every situation we find ourselves.”]

Pray – before, during, and after every situation. When we invite in Jesus before we make any decisions, He takes control. I don’t have to control anything.

Knowing Who You Serve

Another lesson He taught me through caregiving: You must know the person you’re blessed to serve. Study their preferences. Introverted or extroverted? Prefer to spend time alone or crave the company of others? A high or low pain tolerance?

The same principles apply to everyday life. When we’re interacting with loved ones, friends, or strangers, pay attention, listen, and ask questions.

I like to start each day asking God to use me in whatever way He wants. I ask Him to help me slow down and see opportunities where He wants to use me as a blessing.

Approaching life this way, God will provide opportunities for us to bless others. He will give the “wiggle room” in our schedules to take the time to get to know others so our interactions with them are genuine.

[Tweet “We’re here on earth to share about God’s plan with those who don’t know Him and to encourage brothers and sisters in Christ who feel like giving up.”]

We’re here on earth to share God’s plan with those who don’t know Him and to encourage brothers and sisters in Christ who feel like giving up. Best done through relationships. Taking a genuine interest in those God puts in our circles.

Know Your Own Limits

Equally as important as knowing the person you’re called to serve, is staying close enough to God to know your own limits.

This past spring was a busy season for our family. We were dealing with a few serious health crises of family members, emotional burdens of other family members, and added busyness of “end-of-the-school-year activities.” Our oldest graduated from high school, with the added joy of planning his party.

One day, I was attempting to juggle a doctor’s appointment while fielding updates from another family member’s serious illness, while gathering prices at various stores for the party we were planning. While running errands, I looked up when a urinal caught my eye – I had walked into the men’s bathroom!

Two stores later, I “woke up” from my thoughts with enough time to stop from nearly shoplifting three containers of juice. I’d hit my limit. I couldn’t put one more thing in my brain. I shouldn’t make major decisions until I allowed myself time to rest and recover, if only for a few hours.

[Tweet “Fill up with God before you allow yourself to get completely depleted.”]

Know your limits and fill up with God before you get completely depleted. Sometimes, life hits hard and fast and we can’t fill up as fast as we have to pour out. That’s when relying on God’s strength is the best decision we can make.

My recent busyness has included obligations not usually on my plate. Most are good things like celebrations to enjoy and cherish. However, busy is busy and there are still only 24 hours in each day.

[Tweet “Too busy leads to stress. Stress can make a person act differently. Stress can give license to unleash their “crazy.””]

Too busy leads to stress. Stress can make us act differently. Stress can give license to unleash our “crazy.” During the busy, stressful times is when people around us take notice. How will she act in this situation? How will she handle such and such? Especially, if one professes to be a Christ follower.

[Tweet “When we’re at our busiest or when we’re faced with the worst trials, people tend to look the closest and our true character shines through.”]

When we’re at our busiest or when we’re faced with the worst trials, people tend to look the closest and our true character shines through. I had to look in the mirror and decide if I liked the character traits I saw, or if I needed to make some adjustments. More than anything, I want people to see more of Jesus and less of me at all times, but especially in the times of busy.

Busy seasons will always be a part of life. How we prepare ahead of time for them determines how much of Jesus others will see in us during those times. I, for one, want others to see more of Jesus and less of me as I mature and become closer to Jesus’ likeness.

What Characteristics Does Caregiving and Busy Bring Out in You?

I’m Not In Control?

Knowing Who You Serve?

Knowing Your Own Limits?

If you received this blog by email, leave a comment here.

Cheri Swalwell is a Christ follower who thoroughly enjoys her calling to be a wife, mother, and writer, in that order. She enjoys writing regularly for Book Fun Magazine. Her Spoken from the Heart Series is available through Amazon in both eBook and paperback versions. Her book, Hope During Heartache, a compilation of 13 men and women’s stories told from their viewpoint about hope after the loss of a child, is also available at Amazon in both paperback and eBook versions as well as her Bible study, Caring for the Caregiver. To read one of her many articles on life from a Christian perspective, visit her blog. She loves to interact with her readers and would love for you to visit her website or send an email to [email protected] or “like” her on Facebook or interact with her on Twitter, LinkedIN, or Goodreads.

 

 

 

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7 Principles For Making Wise Choices by Dawn Wilson

Today’s guest post is from a dear friend and author, Dawn Wilson. I’m chained to the computer writing a new book with a short deadline. I found it interesting that Dawn’s blog provides us seven principles for making wise choices and the first chapter in my book is “Brave Choices.” I also just finished Chapter Eight “Brave Discernment.” Reading Dawn’s post gives me some new thoughts to consider. I know it will you too because we all make zillions of decisions from the time we get up until we go to bed, and each decision is a “choice.” Enjoy!

 7 Principles For Making Wise Choices by Dawn Wilson

Some people make choices in a “spaghetti” fashion, throwing options at a wall to see what sticks. They’re not sure what to do, so they guess at what God might bless and use.

I used to do that, and ended up making some bad—or not the best—decisions. I concluded it’s far wiser to ask God how to make better biblical choices.

7 Principles for Making Wise Choices by Dawn Wilson

Discernment comes from understanding our inclination toward sin and foolishness, and from knowing the Word of God (Hebrews 5:13-14). The Bible offers clear principles to guide us in making wise big decisions and everyday choices.

[Tweet “The Bible offers clear principles to guide us in making wise big decisions and everyday choices.”]

This is good news whether we’re searching for answers ourselves, or encouraging and mentoring others. Few in our culture have a biblical framework for making healthy, positive decisions—spiritually, emotionally, mentally, socially and physically. We especially need to give new Christ-followers principles for developing discernment and making wise choices so they won’t be easy prey for the enemy.

Principles for Making Godly Decisions

  1. Conscience Principle

Our conscience is the part of our human psyche that causes mental anguish and guilt feelings when we violate our value system. We have feelings of well-being when we conform to our value system. This is often referred to as our moral consciousness—moral awareness—or moral compass. A weak or immature conscience is the product of a faulty value system. Our conscience can be hi-jacked by worldly beliefs, the enemy’s lies, or our own sinful nature. But as believers mature in the faith, our conscience strengthens in the will and ways of God.

[Tweet “Our conscience can be hi-jacked by worldly beliefs, the enemy’s lies, or our own sinful nature.”]

Ask:

  1. Counsel Principle

Our Heavenly Father counsels His children, Jesus is our Wonderful Counselor according to Isaiah 9:6, and He left us another Counselor, the Holy Spirit. We also find counsel in Scripture. God also equips us with wise counsel from Christian teachers and mentors.

Ask:

  1. Convictions Principle

Convictions aren’t our opinions. They’re our firmly held beliefs that ultimately determine who we are and what we do. Convictions often chart our course for life, because they drive our choices. They help us set healthy boundaries. We have convictions about our relationships, career, time, finances, health, entertainment, and our spiritual priorities.

[Tweet “Convictions often chart our course for life, because they drive our choices.”]

Ask:

  1. Cause Principle

Our motives—the underlying reason for our actionsmatter to God. We can serve God from impure motives, but He won’t be impressed! The Bible says our motives will be exposed, and impure motives can hinder our prayers, so we need to carefully check them.

[Tweet “We can serve God from impure motives, but He won’t be impressed!”]

Ask:

  1. Control Principle

Jesus cautioned believers to consider whether we call Him Lord, but still want to be lord of our own life.

Ask:

  1. Consequences Principle

There are good and bad possible consequences of our choices. If we’re wise, we’ll anticipate these natural consequences before moving forward.

Ask:

  1. Concern Principle

[Tweet “It’s so easy to think about our own agenda and not consider how our choices affect others.”]

We live in a selfish world. It’s so easy to think about our own agenda and not consider how our choices affect others. This isn’t a biblical way to live.

Ask:

The more we seek the Lord’s direction for our decisions, the more we will benefit ourselves, bless others, and bring glory to God.

[Tweet “The more we seek the Lord’s direction for our decisions, the more we will benefit ourselves, bless others, and bring glory to God.”]

You may find some principles easier to act on than other principles. What is the hardest one for you to follow regarding your choices?

If you received this blog by email, leave a comment here.

7 Principles for Making Wise Choices__

Dawn Wilson and her husband Bob live in Southern California. They have two married sons and three granddaughters. A former journalist for Christian newspapers, Dawn now assists author and radio host Nancy DeMoss Wolgemuth with research and works with various departments at Revive Our HeartsShe is also the founder and director of Heart Choices Today, publishes UPGRADE with Dawn, and writes for Crosswalk.com and TrueWoman.com. Dawn occasionally travels with her husband Bob with Pacesetter Global Outreach.

https://www.facebook.com/dawnmariewilson

https://twitter.com/dawnmariewilson

Graphic adapted, courtesy of Ben White at Unsplash

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Love Your Body—For Longer Than Thirty Days

Love Your Body Longer Than 30 Days talks about the challenges of keeping weight off beyond the 30 days. Is it a way of eating you could do for life? If not it will be a disappointment.

Love Your Body Like God Loves It

Last week, a Facebook friend posted that she ended up in the hospital after trying a weight-loss drink. My heart sank. Fortunately, she’s fine now, but she’ll never do that again. If you follow my last Monday of the month Love Your Body series, you’ve heard me speak so often about the dangers of quick weight loss products and diets. How many people do you know who have gone on a weight loss shake or product or shots and kept the weight off? These are costly and comprised of chemicals, not natural food no matter how they try to advertise “natural” or even organic. You might lose weight for the short-run, but no one is going to spend the rest of her or his life drinking expensive shakes for a meal or buying the packaged foods some of the programs tout, or going to meetings . . . and as you start slipping back into your old eating habits, (because you haven’t learned new healthy ones) the weight returns, maybe even more than you lost. So this week, I’m rerunning a post as a reminder of how to Love Your Body Like God Loves Your Body!

I know I’m going to take some heat for this blog post, so let me start off by reminding everyone that the only reason I write this series on the last Monday of the month is because I care about your health. My first degree in college was a Bachelor of Science in Dietetics, and I spent a year internship to become a Registered Dietitian, R.D. While I don’t currently practice that profession, I always say, “Once a dietitian, always a dietitian.” When you’ve learned the principles of how to eat the way God made our bodies, why would you ever want to do anything differently?!

[Tweet “Most people want a quick fix and not a lifetime of eating healthy”]

But I didn’t stay in that profession for one reason; most people want a quick fix and not a lifetime of eating healthy. It was a thankless career. I began as a clinical R.D. in hospitals and thought I could be the Florence Nightingale of dietetics and help everyone on the path to wellness. I quickly learned that an R.D. was the meanie. You would think we were taking away their whole reason for living, instead of helping them to live longer! Even though in so many illnesses like diabetes, heart disease, high blood pressure, and weight-related, diet plays such a key role, people are often in denial. They want to take a pill or find an easy solution so they can keep eating the way they love, often more than they love their own bodies and loved ones.

[Tweet ” Easy fast weight loss is not possible. “]

Today the world of nutrition has garnered more respect, but many still ignore advice and wise counsel. Every few months, there’s a new diet touted as easy, fast weight loss, which by the way is not possible. Just look at the most well-known yo-yo celebrity dieter, Oprah. She’s probably tried them all, but the weight always returns.

Or Kirstie Alley and Valerie Bertinelli, who lost weight as spokeswomen for Jenny Craig, but both started gaining it back when the contract ended. Why? No one is going to eat Jenny Craig food for the rest of her life.

Nothing changed about why these women overeat. They didn’t modify their eating habits for life, just the duration of the program. Or the diet got boring and gradually the old eating habits returned. Maybe you’ve been there too.

I have many friends lose weight with Weight Watchers, but when they stopped going to meetings and measuring food, the weight started creeping back on, because again they aren’t going to attend Weight Watchers for life.

[Tweet “Everyone wants to find a way to eat more calories than God made their bodies to need or use, and in some cases will do harm, and still lose weight”]

Everyone wants to find a way to eat more calories than God made their bodies to need or use, and in some cases will do harm, and still lose weight. It isn’t going to happen unless you adopt eating habits good for your body for life.

My Thoughts on the 30-Day Diet

[Tweet “The 30-Day Diet is the latest quick fix weight loss attempt.”]

When I started seeing people on Facebook talking about the latest diet rage, the 30-day diet, my heart sank. I went online and saw that people like Dr. Oz were approving it; but seriously how many other diets has he already approved? I can answer that: whatever is the latest quick fix. For once, it isn’t a bad diet with drinks or shakes you have to purchase or major foods groups to eliminate (except maybe sources of calcium). But almost everyone who is overweight is going to lose weight and detox with only eating 1200 calories, no processed foods, not eating for 12 hours after dinner—everyone should do that—and drinking lots of water—again we all should—and eating kale chips and roasted chickpeas for snacks. Hmm could you live with that as your only snack for longer than 30 days? And exercise is good, but jumping rope I’m not sure many could do as one website suggested.

And of course, there’s always a book for sale.

[Tweet “Is the 30 Day Diet a way of eating someone would do for life? “]

Again, I ask: Is this a way of eating someone would do for life? It wouldn’t be a bad way to eat, but I appreciated this disclaimer at the end of one the descriptions of the diet: Also, like any weight-loss plan, you might regain any weight you lost once you go back to your usual eating habits. To minimize regain, incorporate some of things you learned over the 30-day diet, such as mindful eating and focusing your meals on whole, fresh food.

If you want to do the 30-day diet, I don’t see anything that would hurt you. But as the disclaimer said, don’t start it unless you’re ready to change your eating patterns for life, or it will just be another failed disappointing diet.

What did people learn over the 30 days? Did they learn “mindful eating”?

Why they overeat and food has such a stronghold?

When they overeat?

How to avoid overeating?

What they’re overeating?

Why isn’t reaching their goal and looking amazing in their clothes enough incentive for not gaining back the weight?

Let God Help

[Tweet “The only way to stop overeating for life is not a quick-fix diet”]

The only way to stop overeating for life is not a quick-fix diet; it’s to find the answers to the above questions and I believe God can help you answer them. I had the privilege of writing a Bible study God’s Best for Your Life for First Place 4 Health, a ministry program I highly endorse. It’s not just a diet program focused on a quick weight loss, but a plan for a healthy lifestyle and eating habits for life. Helping those who are in a struggle with weight and food look at the whole body physically, emotionally, spiritually, and mentally from God’s perspective, often in a group setting, but you can also do it on your own with one of their Bible studies.

A Mentor Offers Accountability

[Tweet ” a mentoring relationship can provide the same accountability.”]

The benefit of being in a group setting is accountability, but a mentoring relationship can provide the same accountability. In Mentoring for All Seasons, I discuss how to have a quality accountability relationship. Interestingly the Stages of Mentoring chapter shares a story of a mentor and mentee who met in a First Place 4 Health group at their church. The mentee Tara was leading the group, but she was seeking spiritual wisdom from an older woman, which she found in Jerre.

Many have told me they’ve lost and kept off weight just from the mentoring tips I’ve given in this Love Your Body series. That blesses me beyond words! I’ve seen so much pain and illness from something God made to nourish and sustain us be abused and misused by the evil one causing obsession, and yes, addiction to unhealthy eating patterns.

Love Your Body for More Than 30 Days discusses how an accountabiilty partner helping you stay on a healthy diet is more successful than going on a quick fix diet like the 30 Day diet where even they admit the weight will return if you go back to old eating habits.

Love Your Body Like God Loves Your Body, eat healthy

Here are some previous Love Your Body articles you might enjoy on the topic of developing healthy eating habits to lose and maintain weight loss:

Written by my daughter Love Your Body—Use Technology to Lose Weight

Love Your Body—Break the Food Strongholds, Debbie Dittrich shared her story

Love Your Body—Weight Loss is Not the Goal, Debbie Dittrich shares more of her story

If you received this blog by email, please leave a comment here. Tell us how you’re keeping your weight under control or if you’ve tried the 30-Day Diet.

 

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How To Stand Against Cultural Opposition & Disunity In The Church By Erica Wiggenhorn

Erica Wiggenhorn, author of An Unexplainable Life: Recovering the Wonders and Devotion of the Early Church, is our guest blogger and Erica and I both have a heart for the church today to learn from the church of the past to impact our current culture. In Forsaken God?: Remembering the Goodness of God Our Culture Has Forgotten, I trace the mishaps of the Israelites and how we can learn from their mistakes and forgetfulness of God’s goodness. Erica traces the biblical conflict that started right from the beginning of the church and offers solutions of how to confront inevitable conflict in the current church that is sadly influencing our culture away from God and the church. I’ve also written about resolving conflict biblically in Face-to-Face with Euodia and Syntyche: From Conflict to Community.

I also wrote a recent article for Crosswalk.com you might enjoy reading, Biblical Responses for When the Church Offends or Hurts You.

Enjoy and pray about Erica’s post below.

How can the church not be effected by today's culture

Author/Mentee Erica Wiggenhorn

One of the very first things I noticed about the early Christian church is that trouble started right away. The church was barely a week old before issues arose.

This shouldn’t be a surprise since the Christian church is made up of people—flawed, imperfect human beings. Yet we are somehow shocked today when issues occur within the church. We shake our heads in disbelief when believers disagree with one another, or are outraged when others come against the church because we don’t condone their lifestyle or support their beliefs.

[Tweet “The early Christians in the book of Acts realized that regardless of what they faced, God was on their side and the church was going to continue.”]

The church should expect opposition within its walls and without. By living in a false mentality that the Christian church will perpetually function in peace and unity, we are deceived into not dealing with it. We think something is wrong. But what if we opened up the pages of Scripture, realized that there have always been issues, and therefore actively prepared for them? What if we intentionally wrestle and pray through difficulties before they even arise?

[Tweet “Disagreement and opposition are nothing more than the enemy’s plans to thwart the church.”]

Disagreement and opposition are nothing more than the enemy’s plans to thwart the church. Here are just a handful of accusations that came against the early Christian church within weeks of its inception:

  • Prejudice
  • Favoritism
  • Insurrection
  • Governmental and social unrest
  • Hypocrisy
  • Deceit

How many of these do we see today? Nothing has changed, friends. But what if we changed, went back to the beginning, and prayed specific, powerful prayers like the early believers did?

[Tweet ” Nothing has changed, friends. But what if we changed, went back to the beginning, and prayed specific, powerful prayers like the early believers did?”]

How Should We Respond? What Should We Do?

[Tweet “Next time you feel overwhelmed by cultural opposition—pray. Next time you’re discouraged by disunity within your church—pray. Even before either one happens—pray, because it’s going to happen. Make sure you’re ready.”]

“You spoke by the Holy Spirit through the mouth of your servant, our father David: ‘Why do the nations rage and the peoples plot in vain? The kings of the earth rise up and the rulers band together against the Lord and against his anointed one’ … Now, Lord, consider their threats and enable your servants to speak your word with great boldness.” (Acts 4:25-26, 29)

Look at what God did as a result of this prayer: “After they prayed, the place where they were meeting was shaken. And they were all filled with the Holy Spirit and spoke the word of God boldly.” (Acts 4:31)

God gave them a visible demonstration that His power was mightier than Rome’s greatest emperor! The early Christians didn’t cower in the corner wringing their hands because they faced opposition. They confronted it head-on by addressing the One powerful enough to help them overcome it! They prayed to God. The early Christians in the book of Acts realized that regardless of what they faced, God was on their side and the church was going to continue.

[Tweet “But what if we opened up the pages of Scripture, realized that there have always been issues, and therefore actively prepared for them? “]

God has warned us that we need to prepare for disagreement and opposition. We need to prayerfully decide how we are going to respond to difficult issues. We need to study the Word of God so we are aware of our enemy’s schemes.

We need to realize that trouble is often our greatest indicator that our enemy is threatened and God is at work. And as we study, pray, and come together with other believers wrestling through issues and injustices, the Holy Spirit will move with power—wall shaking power—and give us everything we need to continue to spread the news of Jesus! Two thousand years later, the gospel is still spreading!

[Tweet “The early Christians didn’t cower in the corner wringing their hands because they faced opposition. They confronted it head-on by addressing the One powerful enough to help them overcome it!”]

Next time you feel overwhelmed by cultural opposition—pray. Next time you’re discouraged by disunity within your church—pray. Even before either one happens—pray, because it’s going to happen. Make sure you’re ready.

[Tweet “God has warned us that we need to prepare for disagreement and opposition. We need to prayerfully decide how we are going to respond to difficult issues.”]

[Tweet “Next time you feel overwhelmed by cultural opposition—pray. Next time you’re discouraged by disunity within your church—pray. Even before either one happens—pray, because it’s going to happen. Make sure you’re ready.”]

For more information about her latest Bible study, An Unexplainable Life: Recovering the Wonder and Devotion of the Early Church, and Erica’s Every Life Ministry click here.

Now It’s Your Turn

What is your general response when disunity occurs within your church?

How do you specifically pray for your church’s protection against cultural opposition?

What is one key way to prepare ourselves for opposition within our church or from without?

You can comment below or if you received this blog by email comment here.

An Unexplainable Life

Euodia and Syntyche: From Conflict to Community

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Holy Nectar By Saundria Keck

It’s happening again! I’m blessed to be writing a new book with Leafwood Publishers who have given me a very short deadline. I just started writing and it’s due 9/30/18!! Yikes! So rather than take a hiatus from Monday Morning Blogs, which I did earlier in the year when we were on vacation, I’ve asked some of my author/speaker friends if they would like to share some of their thoughts with you. I know you’ll be blessed, and I’ll add some of my posts as time allows. You know I won’t be able to stay silent if there’s a pressing topic I feel the Lord wants me to share with you.

Today’s guest blogger is Saundria Keck. Enjoy how a hummingbird inspired her to share this message with us, one I needed to hear myself especially as I work towards this deadline in the middle of summer. It’s short and like me, maybe perfect for a refreshing quick read today! Enjoy!

Holy Nectar by Saundria Keck

Holy Nectar from a hummingbird and God

Recently a hummingbird managed to get herself trapped in our garage. When I noticed her, she was flying in a panic near the ceiling, trying desperately to find a way out. As I watched her, I thought: How can I help herJust then, she dropped to the top of my car, wings widespread, breathing laboriously. She was exhausted.

I ran into the house to tell my husband Lee about the bird. He managed to scoop her up in a towel, the sweet thing. He took her outside, placed a capful of nectar near her bill, and gave her a chance to sip and recoup. Eventually she took a sip, and we watched as her breathing became less labored. She rested. She recouped. Then in a flash she flew off. Restored!

[Tweet “Girls, is this you? You are going ninety to nothing? You are exhausted. Do you need a sip of Holy Nectar?”]

Girls, is this you? You are going ninety to nothing? You are exhausted. Do you need a sip of Holy Nectar? Fall. Fall into the arms of Jesus for awhile. Sip on His Word. He will restore you.

[Tweet “Fall into the arms of Jesus for awhile. Sip on His Word. He will restore you.”]

Then you can fly again.

“Yes, my soul, find rest in God; my hope comes from him. Truly he is my rock and my salvation; he is my fortress, I will not be shaken.” Psalm 62:5-6, NIV

If you received this blog by email, leave a message here.

Saundria lives in Franklin, Tennessee with her husband Lee. They have two grown children and six grandchildren. Saundria served in Christian publishing for many years but is now retired. She is nonetheless busy writing books, curriculum and blogs. She also leads a Moms’ Ministry in her church. As a hobby she flower gardens.

A hummingbird reminds us to stop and smell the flowers in Holly Nectar by Saundria Keck

Saundria Keck

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